1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:18,680
there was something in the air

2
00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:24,340
the stars were i think that's is that right is that the lyric i don't know

3
00:00:24,340 --> 00:00:27,120
Something in the air that night

4
00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:29,540
The stars were bright

5
00:00:29,540 --> 00:00:30,700
Fernando

6
00:00:30,700 --> 00:00:36,460
ABBA has a good

7
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Thank you

8
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They have a good catalog

9
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They do

10
00:00:42,340 --> 00:00:43,060
Do you know that

11
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The band's name is

12
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A-B-B-A

13
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Because that's the initials

14
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And what are the odds it just happens to sound like a word

15
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Yeah

16
00:00:54,000 --> 00:01:00,360
Or what if they called themselves Baba instead of Abba?

17
00:01:01,060 --> 00:01:03,000
Or what if they called themselves Bab?

18
00:01:06,220 --> 00:01:09,720
They probably had this exact conversation and going through all of them.

19
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They probably have it every day.

20
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Still.

21
00:01:12,500 --> 00:01:13,660
We should have gone with Bab.

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Can you imagine, what if they would have been like a completely,

23
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do you think the name would have made a difference?

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like yes we would not have embraced them if they were there is a there is like a feeling that comes

25
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with a sound yeah you know yeah yeah i'm not searching for bab again what's the feeling that

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that sound makes you have it's sheepish well yeah yeah it's field music it's a wolf feeling

27
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and baba that's like baby babies drink obviously it was like a slavic sound you know

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baba there are there are a bunch of babies yeah who who is the slavics

29
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at large oh i didn't know i don't know yeah they're fine

30
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slavs if you're listening they are big front of the pod that makes me wonder

31
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what other bands do we not know about that would have been humongous hits?

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Yeah, we'll never know.

33
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We'll never know.

34
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There's no way to know because they were just so poorly named.

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You know, I have another opinion about bands that I don't even,

36
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I'm not going to name this band because I don't want to get heat,

37
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but there's this band that I really like and it's, they're popular,

38
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but they're not as popular as I think they would be if the lead singer was hot.

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Like it's a great band and they make great music and stuff that we all know.

40
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But I feel like if it was a hot lead singer, it would be like.

41
00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:49,480
Now I have to know what band this is.

42
00:02:51,940 --> 00:02:54,940
You mouthed it to Joe, but I didn't make it out.

43
00:02:55,380 --> 00:02:56,280
Okay, I'm just going to say it.

44
00:02:56,340 --> 00:02:56,620
Say it.

45
00:02:57,220 --> 00:02:58,320
You know I think everyone's hot.

46
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So this person must be really a huge dog.

47
00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:05,160
No, that's not why I said that.

48
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I said that because I don't feel this way.

49
00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:09,400
I just feel like if everyone else.

50
00:03:09,580 --> 00:03:12,300
Oh, if you think he's hot or she's hot.

51
00:03:12,420 --> 00:03:13,060
Yeah, yeah.

52
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,640
I'm talking about Death Cab.

53
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Oh, okay.

54
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Ben Gibbons.

55
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Zoe Deschanel thinks he's hot.

56
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She did.

57
00:03:20,860 --> 00:03:21,460
Not anymore.

58
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They're divorced.

59
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So maybe update your knowledge base?

60
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Yeah.

61
00:03:27,460 --> 00:03:27,700
Look.

62
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She's with one of those like twin property brothers guys now.

63
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Oh, really?

64
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Yeah.

65
00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:32,940
Oh, weird.

66
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Those guys creep me out.

67
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Yeah.

68
00:03:34,580 --> 00:03:34,780
Yeah.

69
00:03:34,780 --> 00:03:35,240
Why would she?

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00:03:35,440 --> 00:03:37,380
You guys, I feel bad about name dropping.

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00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:42,420
No, I, but here's my counter to that.

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If he was hot, he wouldn't have made the great music.

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The great music.

74
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Yeah.

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The art would have suffered.

76
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:50,160
Yeah.

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00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:51,800
If he was hot, it just...

78
00:03:51,800 --> 00:04:00,000
Yeah, but there's plenty of middling art that was boosted by the hotness of the singer.

79
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They didn't suffer.

80
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Like, no doubt.

81
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No doubt was...

82
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That's the example that comes to mind first in terms of, like, hot lead singer made them way more popular than they should have been.

83
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I like No Doubt.

84
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Yeah.

85
00:04:15,260 --> 00:04:21,220
Their talent is not commensurate with the level of fame that they reached.

86
00:04:21,380 --> 00:04:21,560
No.

87
00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:28,220
And also the other members of the band are so ugly and unappealing.

88
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All of the hotness is contained in Gwen Stefani for that band.

89
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So I think that's a good example of exactly what you're talking about.

90
00:04:37,340 --> 00:04:40,180
But she wasn't making the music, right?

91
00:04:40,180 --> 00:04:42,560
I don't know who wrote that music, but I doubt it was her.

92
00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:49,580
You doubt that there was sugar crush.

93
00:04:51,020 --> 00:04:52,680
One day I'm not going to laugh when you do those.

94
00:04:52,860 --> 00:04:53,720
Sorry if that ruins what you think.

95
00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:54,440
No,

96
00:04:54,620 --> 00:04:55,100
it makes it,

97
00:04:55,380 --> 00:04:56,100
I think it makes it better.

98
00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:56,660
Also,

99
00:04:56,700 --> 00:05:01,900
they sound so good on the soundboard that I think it sounds like we're doing it.

100
00:05:02,140 --> 00:05:02,720
When you laugh,

101
00:05:02,740 --> 00:05:03,340
I think it's good.

102
00:05:03,380 --> 00:05:05,220
It lets the audience know that that was actually a button.

103
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:06,540
It's not Francis saying it.

104
00:05:07,060 --> 00:05:07,580
Thank you.

105
00:05:07,740 --> 00:05:07,920
Yeah.

106
00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:08,620
Great feedback.

107
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Thanks.

108
00:05:09,460 --> 00:05:10,560
I call it a feedy bee.

109
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maybe it'd be more popular if you named it something else

110
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welcome to very fine friends uh we are music critics extraordinaire i think oh yeah i think

111
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this is excellent insight by us and thank god ava was named ava and thank god's wife

112
00:05:34,420 --> 00:05:46,100
you know she never gets any credit yeah i noticed that um well this is a very exciting

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episode oh yeah this is our one year anniversary episode

114
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isn't that exciting yes it's very exciting

115
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In a way, it feels like it's been longer than a year.

116
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Yeah.

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Because it just feels like we've been just doing this.

118
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I can't imagine that it was only.

119
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Yeah, exactly.

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I can't imagine it was only a year ago that we weren't doing this.

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Let's each do our most excited sound.

122
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Okay.

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Ready?

124
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One, two, three.

125
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That's good.

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Wow.

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Yeah.

128
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I really hope someone was listening high volume with headphones at that moment.

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You're welcome.

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Yeah.

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You're welcome, listeners.

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We did something that most people could never do.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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So, yeah, congratulations to us.

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And thank you, listeners, for listening for a whole year.

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Yeah.

138
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And I want to extend a very special thank you to Francis.

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00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:54,920
What?

140
00:06:55,580 --> 00:07:03,340
Well, first of all, I also want to extend a very special thank you to Joe for always being here,

141
00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:06,700
despite not always wanting to do it.

142
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Despite the terrible decisions that I make the night before

143
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that put a lot of hurdles in between getting from my house to your house.

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But you made it, and you always make it, and I appreciate that.

145
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And, Francis, I appreciate you so much because we've done,

146
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this is now our 54th episode that we're recording right now.

147
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Oh, my God.

148
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And you have had 54 different inventions.

149
00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:32,940
No.

150
00:07:33,340 --> 00:07:44,480
what you said this is our 54th yeah you had one mention okay i had one okay so well i'm assuming

151
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you have a new one today we just invented a little perspective didn't we you're right never

152
00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:53,380
mind i take that thank you back no uh no but that's so impressive that every week you can

153
00:07:53,380 --> 00:07:59,220
come up with something new and you seem to not show any signs of slowing down which is unfathomable

154
00:07:59,220 --> 00:08:08,880
unfathomable to me um and also um i would like mostly the two of you but uh i guess this is a

155
00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:15,440
a group thank you i could barely include myself in this we have also never repeated a middle segment

156
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:23,200
we've had fit well we will have had 54 unique yeah segments too which i think is actually that

157
00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:24,860
to me is a very impressive feat.

158
00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:26,620
So good for us.

159
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:29,920
And they're almost all 10s.

160
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Yeah.

161
00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:31,940
I know.

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00:08:33,700 --> 00:08:48,816
Hey you got to throw a 7 in there every now and again to appreciate the 10s You need a plain Jane to let the hotties shine Yeah if everybody a ten nobody a ten Well Jenna we would be remiss if we didn also thank you

163
00:08:48,816 --> 00:08:50,556
and show our gratitude and appreciation.

164
00:08:51,336 --> 00:08:53,256
You are the lighthouse that brings this ship home.

165
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Okay.

166
00:08:56,316 --> 00:08:57,216
Thank you, baby.

167
00:08:57,376 --> 00:09:01,176
I am the less funny lighthouse guiding this ship.

168
00:09:01,176 --> 00:09:01,896
No, that's not true at all.

169
00:09:02,336 --> 00:09:02,976
I am.

170
00:09:03,036 --> 00:09:03,736
And your voice.

171
00:09:04,316 --> 00:09:05,556
You know, I wish I had your voice.

172
00:09:05,836 --> 00:09:09,056
Do you know how weird my voice would sound coming out of your body?

173
00:09:09,676 --> 00:09:10,276
That would be interesting.

174
00:09:10,436 --> 00:09:11,196
It would be interesting.

175
00:09:11,216 --> 00:09:12,336
But also I would just do radio work.

176
00:09:12,396 --> 00:09:13,256
You should be on the radio.

177
00:09:13,416 --> 00:09:15,156
You should be doing radio stuff.

178
00:09:15,736 --> 00:09:16,096
Thanks.

179
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:16,536
Yeah.

180
00:09:16,636 --> 00:09:18,256
I don't want you to because we're doing this, but.

181
00:09:18,376 --> 00:09:18,556
Right.

182
00:09:19,016 --> 00:09:20,956
No, I appreciate that.

183
00:09:21,056 --> 00:09:22,376
It's good to know, I guess.

184
00:09:22,536 --> 00:09:22,716
Yeah.

185
00:09:23,156 --> 00:09:24,756
You're such a great content machine.

186
00:09:25,076 --> 00:09:25,696
You're hilarious.

187
00:09:26,456 --> 00:09:26,936
Thank you.

188
00:09:28,396 --> 00:09:29,216
You're a guide.

189
00:09:29,416 --> 00:09:30,236
You're a good guide.

190
00:09:30,456 --> 00:09:31,036
I'm a guide.

191
00:09:31,216 --> 00:09:31,716
You're a guide.

192
00:09:31,876 --> 00:09:32,576
I'm a good guide.

193
00:09:33,416 --> 00:09:33,696
Yeah.

194
00:09:34,136 --> 00:09:34,336
Yeah.

195
00:09:34,336 --> 00:09:36,036
Keep things humming.

196
00:09:36,356 --> 00:09:37,496
You're like a train conductor.

197
00:09:38,996 --> 00:09:42,136
You're like a hummingbird's throat box.

198
00:09:43,076 --> 00:09:43,556
What?

199
00:09:44,356 --> 00:09:45,256
What did you hear?

200
00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:47,416
A hummingbird's throat box.

201
00:09:47,536 --> 00:09:48,116
Keeps things humming.

202
00:09:49,096 --> 00:09:51,896
Oh, that's not how they hum, is it?

203
00:09:52,236 --> 00:09:53,676
No, I don't think they hum.

204
00:09:53,816 --> 00:09:58,376
I also was imagining a hummingbird with one of those little machine things that smokers have.

205
00:09:58,536 --> 00:10:00,176
That's what I thought you meant by voice box.

206
00:10:00,876 --> 00:10:02,456
Rather than that part of the body.

207
00:10:02,456 --> 00:10:03,536
No, that's okay.

208
00:10:04,336 --> 00:10:09,596
um all right and then i said to myself well i'm afraid you're being a dumb bitch

209
00:10:09,596 --> 00:10:20,356
oh we did it yeah well okay sorry listeners that you had to hear us congratulate ourselves

210
00:10:20,356 --> 00:10:28,296
they're all crying at home oh this is our moment what is our moment and you won't have to hear us

211
00:10:28,296 --> 00:10:36,196
talking like this for another year yeah so shut up yeah silence you assholes yeah and your assholes

212
00:10:36,196 --> 00:10:47,616
wives yeah behind every asshole there's an asshole wife that's probably true yeah it's just numbers

213
00:10:47,616 --> 00:10:55,796
cold hard math quick interruption every week on the podcast we do something where our producer joe

214
00:10:55,796 --> 00:11:01,976
gives Francis and I each our own secret word. Throughout the course of the podcast,

215
00:11:02,336 --> 00:11:07,996
we need to find a way to slip the secret word into our conversation without the other person

216
00:11:07,996 --> 00:11:14,176
noticing. If the other person can correctly guess the secret word, they get a point. And

217
00:11:14,176 --> 00:11:21,356
right before we die, we add up all the points. And then we get a prize, whoever has the most

218
00:11:21,356 --> 00:11:27,016
points for guessing the most secret words. Here's Joe with today's secret words.

219
00:11:27,756 --> 00:11:33,956
Jenna's secret word is criminalistics. Jenna's decoy word is bewitched. Francis's secret word

220
00:11:33,956 --> 00:11:41,816
is iguanas. Francis's decoy word is tablecloths. Back to the pod. Since I'm the train conductor,

221
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I'm going to keep this train moving and say it's time for the invention of the week.

222
00:11:48,076 --> 00:11:51,016
inventions.

223
00:11:54,256 --> 00:11:56,316
Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga.

224
00:11:58,756 --> 00:12:00,756
Oh, I regret everything.

225
00:12:02,576 --> 00:12:04,896
Well, first of all, thank you again for that lovely,

226
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:06,816
the lovely words.

227
00:12:07,256 --> 00:12:10,676
This week's unique invention is a umbrella for your car.

228
00:12:12,916 --> 00:12:14,736
Oh my God, that would be so funny

229
00:12:14,736 --> 00:12:17,636
if we just basically re-recorded every episode.

230
00:12:18,076 --> 00:12:25,716
no no no no um you can't improve on perfection so i'm gonna leave that one where it is okay

231
00:12:25,716 --> 00:12:32,616
i have a i have a fun idea this week oh finally yeah finally it's time for fun

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00:12:32,616 --> 00:12:45,796
tempo the fun um and here it is you know how sometimes there's intruders i do know that you

233
00:12:45,796 --> 00:12:51,636
You know how people have fear mongered the entire country and everyone worries about a break in?

234
00:12:52,356 --> 00:12:52,716
Yes.

235
00:12:52,716 --> 00:12:53,236
Hmm.

236
00:12:54,836 --> 00:13:05,136
Well, wouldn't it be great if there was a new kind of home security system that could traumatize the intruder?

237
00:13:05,956 --> 00:13:06,556
Yeah.

238
00:13:07,976 --> 00:13:08,576
Okay.

239
00:13:08,736 --> 00:13:11,536
Well then, Jenna, you're going to love this.

240
00:13:11,636 --> 00:13:11,996
Great.

241
00:13:13,676 --> 00:13:14,876
And here's why.

242
00:13:15,796 --> 00:13:27,676
My new security system is a psychological buffer that will scare any intruder that comes into your home.

243
00:13:27,776 --> 00:13:28,456
Let me explain how it works.

244
00:13:29,936 --> 00:13:31,696
Somebody gains entry into your house.

245
00:13:32,036 --> 00:13:32,136
Okay?

246
00:13:32,516 --> 00:13:36,856
It's not like the traditional where it sets off a blaring alarm.

247
00:13:37,156 --> 00:13:37,656
Boring.

248
00:13:38,156 --> 00:13:38,976
Old news.

249
00:13:39,276 --> 00:13:40,216
Well, they're expecting that.

250
00:13:40,256 --> 00:13:41,056
It doesn't work.

251
00:13:41,256 --> 00:13:42,756
They're mentally prepared for that.

252
00:13:42,756 --> 00:13:43,016
Yeah.

253
00:13:43,016 --> 00:13:47,396
Yeah. Most home burglaries, they're in and out within eight minutes.

254
00:13:48,456 --> 00:13:48,676
Yeah.

255
00:13:48,876 --> 00:13:51,016
Yeah. How long do you think it's going to take about cops to get there?

256
00:13:52,416 --> 00:13:53,316
I don't know.

257
00:13:53,776 --> 00:13:59,396
I know. Cops are reactive. They're not, they don't prevent crime. They just document it.

258
00:13:59,536 --> 00:14:02,576
Yeah. Even if they're right there, what if they're on break? Sorry, Ken, I'm on break.

259
00:14:02,996 --> 00:14:03,676
Yeah. Union.

260
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:11,116
Well, don't worry. That's gone now because my new invention, oh, here it comes.

261
00:14:11,116 --> 00:14:17,816
someone comes in breaks into your house okay okay picturing it they trip the like motion or whatever

262
00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:22,376
system we've set up right probably probably a combination of things whatever door sensor

263
00:14:22,376 --> 00:14:28,436
window glass break whatever motion sensor whatever when they come into the house

264
00:14:28,436 --> 00:14:39,176
it automatically kills all the lights in the house so it goes pitch black eerie music starts to play

265
00:14:39,176 --> 00:14:45,876
the lights come back on but it's like a a red light throughout the entire house

266
00:14:45,876 --> 00:14:53,196
and then there's like our our equipment comes with little projectors that puts things on the

267
00:14:53,196 --> 00:14:58,796
walls like a crawling like demon type thing that will like scatter across the wall you know and

268
00:14:58,796 --> 00:15:07,076
stuff like that that will literally like terrify the burglar you know yeah and like a tv will come

269
00:15:07,076 --> 00:15:09,036
on like an old

270
00:15:09,036 --> 00:15:11,236
fashioned big like a

271
00:15:11,236 --> 00:15:13,096
like a TV. Oh yeah.

272
00:15:13,276 --> 00:15:14,696
You know like a like a

273
00:15:14,696 --> 00:15:17,056
90s TV CRT. Wait is that right?

274
00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:18,836
It comes out with like snow

275
00:15:18,836 --> 00:15:20,996
and a hand is like on the other

276
00:15:20,996 --> 00:15:22,956
side of the glass like we're gonna scare

277
00:15:22,956 --> 00:15:23,736
these assholes.

278
00:15:24,656 --> 00:15:26,836
You know. So basically

279
00:15:26,836 --> 00:15:28,276
this invention is

280
00:15:28,276 --> 00:15:30,916
come live in a haunted house.

281
00:15:31,176 --> 00:15:33,096
Make your house a haunted house for the burglar.

282
00:15:33,656 --> 00:15:35,296
But it also has alerted the authorities.

283
00:15:36,356 --> 00:15:36,516
Yeah.

284
00:15:36,516 --> 00:15:41,076
who are on the way but they're gonna be gone until they get there because what the fuck is happening

285
00:15:41,076 --> 00:15:52,396
you know yeah so what do you think i think i love the idea i think that

286
00:15:52,396 --> 00:16:01,836
um i think that we have to be careful that to not stand that we need to have

287
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:03,836
a bunch of different things because

288
00:16:03,836 --> 00:16:06,316
people, criminals are going to get wise

289
00:16:06,316 --> 00:16:08,676
to the fact that this is

290
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:12,436
like something that happens.

291
00:16:12,636 --> 00:16:14,076
It's just similar to an alarm,

292
00:16:14,216 --> 00:16:16,076
like how they're expecting a loud noise

293
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:16,876
when they break in.

294
00:16:17,196 --> 00:16:19,936
They'll be expecting a haunted house feel.

295
00:16:20,476 --> 00:16:23,196
So I think we need to have a bunch of varied

296
00:16:23,196 --> 00:16:25,756
styles.

297
00:16:27,856 --> 00:16:28,376
And

298
00:16:28,376 --> 00:16:30,496
yeah.

299
00:16:30,496 --> 00:16:34,116
But I like the idea of the psychological torture.

300
00:16:34,296 --> 00:16:43,236
I'm not a, I mean, not an expert on crime or would that be criminalistics, whatever.

301
00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:53,016
But I think if we can vary it enough, then people will not expect it.

302
00:16:53,016 --> 00:17:03,656
so what other kinds of psychological torture could we do it's not like haunted housey well

303
00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:07,916
here's another part of it our technology comes with a built-in gun in the attic

304
00:17:07,916 --> 00:17:28,912
okay that points straight down so there if and if the alarm is tripped and someone someone goes to where there like a pressure sensor in the floor and they stand there it shoots them in the head So even if burglars know okay this is

305
00:17:29,172 --> 00:17:32,472
they have the scary security.

306
00:17:32,732 --> 00:17:33,412
Ooh, write that down.

307
00:17:33,812 --> 00:17:34,352
Scary security.

308
00:17:35,792 --> 00:17:36,592
Scared secure.

309
00:17:36,812 --> 00:17:37,232
Write that down.

310
00:17:39,092 --> 00:17:41,092
They know that, oh shit, if I walk in this somewhere,

311
00:17:41,232 --> 00:17:43,432
I could step wrong in this house and I could have my head blown off.

312
00:17:43,672 --> 00:17:45,212
Like, oof, it's not worth it.

313
00:17:45,652 --> 00:17:45,872
You know?

314
00:17:46,672 --> 00:17:50,612
I think that might be enough right there.

315
00:17:51,412 --> 00:17:51,892
Yeah.

316
00:17:52,252 --> 00:17:56,512
This feels like a hat on a hat, so to speak.

317
00:17:56,672 --> 00:17:58,012
A gun on a gun, if you will.

318
00:17:58,272 --> 00:18:00,652
That's the second time I've heard the phrase hat on a hat recently.

319
00:18:00,852 --> 00:18:01,952
Oh, really? I love that phrase.

320
00:18:03,472 --> 00:18:08,412
What if it was like there was an AI companion that did a face scan

321
00:18:08,412 --> 00:18:12,072
on whoever breaks in as soon as it happens

322
00:18:12,072 --> 00:18:15,472
and then figures out if they have any loved ones

323
00:18:15,472 --> 00:18:21,132
and then it like projects like the loved ones and like a picture of like them holding up a

324
00:18:21,132 --> 00:18:25,072
newspaper and they're like they have like duct tape over their mouth and they're all scared and

325
00:18:25,072 --> 00:18:31,652
they're standing in front of someplace called like rapists and murderers incorporated well i love it

326
00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:38,412
i know that's good right um and then but llc that means we every single day yeah we need that

327
00:18:38,412 --> 00:18:42,812
protection we need to take a picture of every family with duct tape over the mouth holding

328
00:18:42,812 --> 00:18:48,272
today's newspaper just in case their dad decides to go do something like that.

329
00:18:48,532 --> 00:18:55,452
Luckily, though, the Rapists and Murderers LLC building backdrop, we can just green screen

330
00:18:55,452 --> 00:18:55,712
that.

331
00:18:55,912 --> 00:18:57,132
So that's easy.

332
00:18:57,432 --> 00:18:58,052
That's easy.

333
00:18:58,232 --> 00:18:59,132
That's modern tech.

334
00:18:59,292 --> 00:19:03,792
I actually have that stock footage already, actually, now that I think about it.

335
00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:04,092
Right.

336
00:19:04,312 --> 00:19:06,972
Well, what if...

337
00:19:06,972 --> 00:19:07,552
Now, hear me out.

338
00:19:08,012 --> 00:19:09,252
Because I like the shooting them ankle.

339
00:19:09,252 --> 00:19:17,932
i feel like we keep coming back to shooting them in the head yeah i'm thinking what if the gun

340
00:19:17,932 --> 00:19:23,832
would come out from the wall and it was like on a swivel okay and here's what i'm thinking

341
00:19:23,832 --> 00:19:29,892
when you set up your home security device you it's motion and it's motion sensing

342
00:19:29,892 --> 00:19:35,212
you set up who's allowed to come in so you know people have their own passwords

343
00:19:35,212 --> 00:19:37,452
you get a scan of yourself

344
00:19:37,452 --> 00:19:39,072
so it's like okay that's mom, that's dad

345
00:19:39,072 --> 00:19:41,392
so you're a blacklist basically

346
00:19:41,392 --> 00:19:42,432
a kill list

347
00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:44,672
or it's a non-kill list

348
00:19:44,672 --> 00:19:46,732
this is the safe party

349
00:19:46,732 --> 00:19:48,052
so it's like these are the people that live here

350
00:19:48,052 --> 00:19:49,832
these are the people that we've given access to the home

351
00:19:49,832 --> 00:19:52,492
if it isn't these people and they come in

352
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:53,732
shoot them

353
00:19:53,732 --> 00:19:55,952
how funny would it be

354
00:19:55,952 --> 00:19:57,912
if some guy who just got married

355
00:19:57,912 --> 00:20:01,012
is carrying his new bride across the threshold

356
00:20:01,012 --> 00:20:02,072
they're like wow

357
00:20:02,072 --> 00:20:05,012
we haven't had sex yet, we haven't been living together

358
00:20:05,012 --> 00:20:09,692
now we get to move into a marital home and he's like oh shit i forgot to put her on the white

359
00:20:09,692 --> 00:20:15,112
well the thing would see him holding her and be like oh it's my inference oh okay you know yeah

360
00:20:15,112 --> 00:20:21,932
now it's it's advanced what if it's the other way around she's holding him what if it's her house

361
00:20:21,932 --> 00:20:29,032
and the groom's moving in he just gets shot and then she falls to the ground no because the other

362
00:20:29,032 --> 00:20:34,232
person's in the is there so the thing will be like oh and it's it's advanced tech so it's going to be

363
00:20:34,232 --> 00:20:39,032
like oh he's holding her they know each other not like oh he's got like a gun to her head like

364
00:20:39,032 --> 00:20:45,812
then i could shoot him i feel like we're gonna get a lot of erroneous deaths if we all if it's

365
00:20:45,812 --> 00:20:53,632
just a whitelist situation what if your house is on fire and then the firemen run it it's just like

366
00:20:53,632 --> 00:20:59,912
that won't happen because you know how the there's like a knock box for the fire department

367
00:20:59,912 --> 00:21:02,032
like they can go get a key to a building

368
00:21:02,032 --> 00:21:02,772
because it's like

369
00:21:02,772 --> 00:21:03,692
yeah

370
00:21:03,692 --> 00:21:05,672
so it's like there's like a thing that's like oh

371
00:21:05,672 --> 00:21:07,952
they've got the system and they can deactivate it

372
00:21:07,952 --> 00:21:08,832
with the fireman's key

373
00:21:08,832 --> 00:21:13,872
so they gotta waste valuable

374
00:21:13,872 --> 00:21:14,412
time

375
00:21:14,412 --> 00:21:17,912
well they have to do that for businesses anyway

376
00:21:17,912 --> 00:21:19,912
to get in

377
00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:21,732
has anyone ever

378
00:21:21,732 --> 00:21:22,612
thought of being

379
00:21:22,612 --> 00:21:25,092
stealing a fireman's key

380
00:21:25,092 --> 00:21:27,732
and breaking into places

381
00:21:27,732 --> 00:21:28,192
that way

382
00:21:28,192 --> 00:21:34,252
I don't know if anyone's ever thought of it

383
00:21:34,252 --> 00:21:39,132
I'm just picturing firemen just have one big keychain

384
00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:40,852
just like for the whole city

385
00:21:40,852 --> 00:21:42,912
just like thousands and thousands

386
00:21:42,912 --> 00:21:44,272
I gotta try the next one

387
00:21:44,272 --> 00:21:48,132
but is that

388
00:21:48,132 --> 00:21:52,252
I kind of forgot about the fireman's key thing

389
00:21:52,252 --> 00:21:53,852
well okay anyway

390
00:21:53,852 --> 00:21:57,952
I'm gonna not try and

391
00:21:57,952 --> 00:21:59,952
think about that too much

392
00:21:59,952 --> 00:22:04,132
I like the idea of

393
00:22:04,132 --> 00:22:06,072
is there a way we can

394
00:22:06,072 --> 00:22:09,952
psychologically torture them like mental

395
00:22:09,952 --> 00:22:11,992
like prey on their deepest

396
00:22:11,992 --> 00:22:12,512
fears

397
00:22:12,512 --> 00:22:15,772
how are we gonna get that information

398
00:22:15,772 --> 00:22:17,732
I know well

399
00:22:17,732 --> 00:22:21,472
I don't know we could

400
00:22:21,472 --> 00:22:24,192
quickly because you know how the brain can process

401
00:22:24,192 --> 00:22:25,972
certain frames per second?

402
00:22:26,212 --> 00:22:26,432
Yeah.

403
00:22:26,932 --> 00:22:29,852
We can quickly show multiple frames

404
00:22:29,852 --> 00:22:31,092
of different things that are scary

405
00:22:31,092 --> 00:22:34,692
and know which ones the person reacted to

406
00:22:34,692 --> 00:22:36,392
and be like, that's what they're afraid of.

407
00:22:36,392 --> 00:22:38,312
And then we adjust our security posture.

408
00:22:40,072 --> 00:22:41,512
Yeah, that's a good idea.

409
00:22:45,892 --> 00:22:47,632
We have a voice that comes over.

410
00:22:48,332 --> 00:22:49,732
Son, this is your father.

411
00:22:52,432 --> 00:22:53,672
I came back.

412
00:22:54,472 --> 00:22:56,992
The reason, you're the reason that I left.

413
00:22:58,332 --> 00:23:01,732
I want the criminal to be weeping, is my point.

414
00:23:01,852 --> 00:23:03,992
Yeah, a little PA system comes on that says,

415
00:23:04,092 --> 00:23:05,932
attention, someone who was raised poorly

416
00:23:05,932 --> 00:23:07,472
has just broken into the house.

417
00:23:08,812 --> 00:23:10,932
An uggo is entering the house.

418
00:23:11,592 --> 00:23:14,372
If this person was the main singer of the band,

419
00:23:14,432 --> 00:23:15,512
they'd never make it.

420
00:23:16,612 --> 00:23:18,672
But the art would be great.

421
00:23:21,472 --> 00:23:23,032
Just to be clear, Death Cup did make it.

422
00:23:25,452 --> 00:23:27,992
I just like the outcome where they're dead.

423
00:23:30,612 --> 00:23:33,092
Which is a different outcome than what you started with.

424
00:23:33,132 --> 00:23:34,272
Well, no, first you scare them.

425
00:23:34,812 --> 00:23:36,032
If they leave, guess what?

426
00:23:36,072 --> 00:23:36,912
They save their own life.

427
00:23:37,472 --> 00:23:38,292
Good for you.

428
00:23:38,792 --> 00:23:39,832
Good for you.

429
00:23:39,952 --> 00:23:40,132
Yeah.

430
00:23:40,212 --> 00:23:44,152
If they keep going, they're probably, I mean, there's probably some, they could be on drugs.

431
00:23:45,012 --> 00:23:45,312
Yeah.

432
00:23:45,612 --> 00:23:49,792
So it's like, you know how they say, I don't know if this is an urban legend, but someone who's like hopped up on meth

433
00:23:49,792 --> 00:23:54,972
can take like multiple bullets and keep going because they're like on planet

434
00:23:54,972 --> 00:23:55,492
zero on.

435
00:23:55,772 --> 00:23:56,092
Yeah.

436
00:23:57,432 --> 00:23:59,572
If we get to that point of the invasion,

437
00:24:00,032 --> 00:24:02,792
we're going to have to bring out the swivel gun.

438
00:24:04,652 --> 00:24:05,092
Oh,

439
00:24:05,092 --> 00:24:06,532
I thought you were going to say it like where they,

440
00:24:06,632 --> 00:24:08,432
we shoot them and then they're,

441
00:24:08,492 --> 00:24:13,112
they're still like hopped up on drugs and didn't die.

442
00:24:13,332 --> 00:24:13,612
Well,

443
00:24:13,652 --> 00:24:13,932
you can,

444
00:24:14,032 --> 00:24:14,732
as the homeowner,

445
00:24:15,252 --> 00:24:18,392
you can set the kill setting to whatever you're comfortable with.

446
00:24:18,392 --> 00:24:23,532
So if you just wanted to pop out both knees and then, so they're like, but then they can't

447
00:24:23,532 --> 00:24:25,192
then they're in your house.

448
00:24:25,312 --> 00:24:26,352
And the cops are on the way.

449
00:24:26,792 --> 00:24:27,132
Yeah.

450
00:24:27,252 --> 00:24:28,252
They're in your house dead.

451
00:24:28,372 --> 00:24:28,832
What's the difference?

452
00:24:28,932 --> 00:24:29,112
Yeah.

453
00:24:29,212 --> 00:24:34,972
It's like, cause they're setting for like two to the chest, one between the eyes or something.

454
00:24:35,152 --> 00:24:35,812
John Wick style.

455
00:24:36,012 --> 00:24:36,252
Yeah.

456
00:24:36,472 --> 00:24:36,752
Yeah.

457
00:24:37,412 --> 00:24:39,752
That's the, it's like quick, quick and steady.

458
00:24:39,752 --> 00:24:40,732
That's the number four.

459
00:24:40,912 --> 00:24:43,052
A lot of our customers love this option.

460
00:24:43,052 --> 00:24:43,672
It's a built in preset.

461
00:24:45,792 --> 00:24:46,152
Okay.

462
00:24:46,152 --> 00:24:48,392
So we're still having the scaring them at the beginning

463
00:24:48,392 --> 00:24:49,652
and then shooting them.

464
00:24:52,652 --> 00:24:53,092
Yes.

465
00:24:53,572 --> 00:24:55,632
The scaring them is to get them to leave.

466
00:24:55,992 --> 00:24:57,392
If they don't leave, they will die.

467
00:24:57,672 --> 00:24:59,712
How embarrassing would it be if we shot them first

468
00:24:59,712 --> 00:25:00,812
and then tried to scare them?

469
00:25:01,832 --> 00:25:02,272
Oops.

470
00:25:03,872 --> 00:25:05,212
A little bit of a blooper.

471
00:25:06,852 --> 00:25:08,572
Well, if it happens, it happens.

472
00:25:09,472 --> 00:25:10,272
You shouldn't have come in.

473
00:25:11,152 --> 00:25:11,552
Yeah.

474
00:25:12,192 --> 00:25:14,252
I had a name for it

475
00:25:14,252 --> 00:25:16,652
when it was originally just a haunted house.

476
00:25:16,832 --> 00:25:17,152
Oh, okay.

477
00:25:18,332 --> 00:25:19,852
Mi casa es bu casa.

478
00:25:20,732 --> 00:25:22,512
I think we can shorten that to bu casa.

479
00:25:23,532 --> 00:25:23,712
Yeah.

480
00:25:23,972 --> 00:25:25,272
Yeah, that's good.

481
00:25:26,372 --> 00:25:27,252
Air boo and boo.

482
00:25:29,192 --> 00:25:29,952
Das boo.

483
00:25:33,192 --> 00:25:34,412
I like that. That's good.

484
00:25:34,652 --> 00:25:34,972
Thank you.

485
00:25:36,752 --> 00:25:38,432
I like scary security too.

486
00:25:39,752 --> 00:25:40,552
Scared secure.

487
00:25:41,392 --> 00:25:42,452
Ding dong dead.

488
00:25:42,452 --> 00:25:47,532
I think that's already the title of something's gotta be that's like it sounds like a bad movie

489
00:25:47,532 --> 00:25:51,812
no I think like a goosebumps now yeah I was just gonna say that to me I think I is my brain's telling

490
00:25:51,812 --> 00:25:56,532
me that that's like a goosebumps book ding dong dead ding dong you're dead R.L. Stine if you're

491
00:25:56,532 --> 00:26:07,648
listening we know you are if you wrote a book called that just forget about it can copyright a title I famously once said on this podcast You right because you a lawyer

492
00:26:07,928 --> 00:26:08,228
That's right.

493
00:26:08,348 --> 00:26:08,648
Yeah, I know.

494
00:26:09,048 --> 00:26:09,448
We know.

495
00:26:09,528 --> 00:26:10,248
Day one of law school.

496
00:26:11,348 --> 00:26:11,608
Yep.

497
00:26:12,128 --> 00:26:13,368
So, you love it.

498
00:26:14,368 --> 00:26:14,768
Yes.

499
00:26:15,068 --> 00:26:17,348
We'll get this passed.

500
00:26:18,308 --> 00:26:21,108
I want to think of the scary part.

501
00:26:21,208 --> 00:26:23,408
I want to come up with more scary stuff.

502
00:26:23,408 --> 00:26:33,488
because that's like classic okay this is uh i would say okay here's

503
00:26:34,628 --> 00:26:42,028
i'm sorry i had three things going on in my head at the time uh okay i would say a good way to scare

504
00:26:42,028 --> 00:26:48,808
people would be to make them think that they just got infected with something really deadly

505
00:26:48,808 --> 00:26:53,128
just by entering your house oh like a dart comes out with one of those darts with like the the

506
00:26:53,128 --> 00:26:59,068
red feathers on the end and it shoots across the room and or just like like you've entered a

507
00:26:59,068 --> 00:27:06,168
quarantine zone you are now infected with whatever terrible virus that would be scary

508
00:27:06,168 --> 00:27:11,848
yeah like you have this amount of time to leave otherwise your skin will start falling off your

509
00:27:11,848 --> 00:27:16,888
body or whatever and like who's gonna mess around with that and okay but i was thinking about this

510
00:27:16,888 --> 00:27:17,388
And I don't know.

511
00:27:17,528 --> 00:27:18,148
I can't believe that.

512
00:27:18,688 --> 00:27:20,888
This is a suburban neighborhood.

513
00:27:21,968 --> 00:27:24,048
Why does this house have a disease in it?

514
00:27:25,248 --> 00:27:28,868
Oh, but a demon crawling on the walls?

515
00:27:28,868 --> 00:27:31,868
People are deathly afraid of paranormal things.

516
00:27:32,788 --> 00:27:34,668
They're also deathly afraid of dying.

517
00:27:35,948 --> 00:27:41,788
Again, not an expert on crime or criminalistics or whatever.

518
00:27:43,088 --> 00:27:44,328
I'm just saying.

519
00:27:46,888 --> 00:27:52,988
And this, I think this is another tactic that would work. I think there might be people that

520
00:27:52,988 --> 00:28:00,668
aren't scared by haunted houses that are scared by like thinking they're going to die. And I think,

521
00:28:01,308 --> 00:28:05,428
okay, well, this is the reason why I thought of it too. This is what was going through my head

522
00:28:05,428 --> 00:28:15,768
when I was stumbling over my words. So I've often thought or like thought for a long time that if

523
00:28:15,768 --> 00:28:24,668
like I was about to be raped, this sounds so terrible. I would just be like, go ahead. I have

524
00:28:24,668 --> 00:28:34,048
AIDS. This is an idea I came up with like at the age of like 15, by the way. Solid. Yeah. This is

525
00:28:34,048 --> 00:28:38,848
going to be my plan. Like just act like, you know, like fine jokes on you. You're going to get,

526
00:28:38,848 --> 00:28:43,968
you know, like I realized AIDS is something that's more manageable now. Yeah. Yeah. Um,

527
00:28:43,968 --> 00:28:44,208
but,

528
00:28:44,508 --> 00:28:46,068
but at the time when I was 15,

529
00:28:46,148 --> 00:28:47,168
that was a death sentence.

530
00:28:48,088 --> 00:28:49,048
What if he just,

531
00:28:49,268 --> 00:28:50,228
what if they're just like,

532
00:28:50,468 --> 00:28:51,708
so do I know.

533
00:28:51,808 --> 00:28:55,488
And then you actually have AIDS or what if he just pauses and like,

534
00:28:55,488 --> 00:28:55,908
it's like,

535
00:28:55,968 --> 00:28:57,268
I was going to get it.

536
00:28:58,928 --> 00:29:00,148
He's a safe rapist.

537
00:29:00,328 --> 00:29:00,468
Yeah.

538
00:29:00,588 --> 00:29:03,388
What kind of a rapist is walking around with a condom?

539
00:29:04,848 --> 00:29:08,828
I think I don't think he's like no glove,

540
00:29:08,928 --> 00:29:09,828
no forced love.

541
00:29:11,068 --> 00:29:12,268
That's my rule.

542
00:29:12,268 --> 00:29:14,048
I don't know.

543
00:29:14,108 --> 00:29:16,168
Do you think they mostly don't use them?

544
00:29:16,368 --> 00:29:17,328
A hundred percent.

545
00:29:17,488 --> 00:29:18,468
Oh, but that's DNA.

546
00:29:21,608 --> 00:29:28,108
I think, I mean, I'm not a man, but men don't like wearing condoms, right?

547
00:29:28,268 --> 00:29:29,588
Right, but this is crime.

548
00:29:29,688 --> 00:29:31,008
I'm wearing one right now.

549
00:29:31,848 --> 00:29:33,688
Not for, I mean, you wear it for fun.

550
00:29:33,688 --> 00:29:33,888
It's a condom on a condom.

551
00:29:35,968 --> 00:29:37,468
It's a condom on a condom.

552
00:29:37,468 --> 00:29:45,468
But if you're about to commit a felony and you know that what you're going to leave behind will tie the crime to you, why would you...

553
00:29:47,408 --> 00:29:49,288
Why are we trying to get into the mind of a rapist?

554
00:29:49,448 --> 00:29:52,108
Who knows what they're thinking and what they're doing.

555
00:29:52,648 --> 00:29:57,848
Well, I just have to go to Rapists and Murderers LLC and interview a few of them.

556
00:29:58,148 --> 00:29:58,308
Yeah.

557
00:29:59,128 --> 00:30:01,768
Make sure when you walk in the building, you announce your disease.

558
00:30:05,008 --> 00:30:05,788
Lupus coming.

559
00:30:07,468 --> 00:30:11,208
I was thinking one that they would be scared of getting from hurting you.

560
00:30:11,768 --> 00:30:12,988
That'd be really funny.

561
00:30:13,508 --> 00:30:15,888
Just be like, go ahead.

562
00:30:16,168 --> 00:30:17,368
I have polio.

563
00:30:18,488 --> 00:30:19,888
Go ahead.

564
00:30:19,968 --> 00:30:21,488
I just recovered from a cold.

565
00:30:22,608 --> 00:30:24,368
Not sexually transmittable.

566
00:30:25,768 --> 00:30:28,108
I think the disease thing, if we could somehow affect it,

567
00:30:28,148 --> 00:30:30,368
I think that that would scare people more because it's like,

568
00:30:30,968 --> 00:30:33,388
there are probably a lot of people that could like take a second,

569
00:30:33,388 --> 00:30:36,248
like realize what's going on and then just be like, okay.

570
00:30:36,248 --> 00:30:46,508
And I know you added the extra layer of guns, which is, that's always an effective option.

571
00:30:48,708 --> 00:30:50,848
You just invented gun ownership.

572
00:30:52,208 --> 00:30:54,688
But when you're not home.

573
00:30:56,168 --> 00:30:58,248
Is that legal?

574
00:30:59,408 --> 00:31:00,248
Can you rig something?

575
00:31:01,328 --> 00:31:02,128
We'll just lobby.

576
00:31:02,588 --> 00:31:02,848
Okay.

577
00:31:02,848 --> 00:31:05,468
I feel like that's

578
00:31:05,468 --> 00:31:06,688
It's kind of like

579
00:31:06,688 --> 00:31:08,048
Like self-driving cars

580
00:31:08,048 --> 00:31:08,488
Or whatever

581
00:31:08,488 --> 00:31:09,388
Yeah

582
00:31:09,388 --> 00:31:09,808
Right?

583
00:31:10,428 --> 00:31:10,688
Yeah

584
00:31:10,688 --> 00:31:12,088
Why do you need someone

585
00:31:12,088 --> 00:31:14,088
Behind the wheel of a gun?

586
00:31:14,768 --> 00:31:15,468
I mean

587
00:31:15,468 --> 00:31:17,588
If the gun can kill the intruder

588
00:31:17,588 --> 00:31:19,168
If it's programmed correctly

589
00:31:19,168 --> 00:31:20,188
Yeah, why do I need to be there?

590
00:31:20,188 --> 00:31:21,068
Then it's actually probably gonna

591
00:31:21,068 --> 00:31:22,408
Have fewer

592
00:31:22,408 --> 00:31:23,268
Bad

593
00:31:23,268 --> 00:31:24,908
Deaths

594
00:31:24,908 --> 00:31:25,828
Plus I don't wanna see it

595
00:31:25,828 --> 00:31:27,368
It could all be taken care of

596
00:31:27,368 --> 00:31:27,928
Before I get home

597
00:31:27,928 --> 00:31:28,648
Yeah

598
00:31:28,648 --> 00:31:30,408
Saves you the

599
00:31:30,408 --> 00:31:31,928
Feeling of having murdered somebody

600
00:31:31,928 --> 00:31:33,868
100%

601
00:31:33,868 --> 00:31:34,508
which is a

602
00:31:34,508 --> 00:31:36,008
I think that's

603
00:31:36,008 --> 00:31:36,888
unless that's something

604
00:31:36,888 --> 00:31:37,648
you're looking for

605
00:31:37,648 --> 00:31:38,648
in Francis' case

606
00:31:38,648 --> 00:31:41,208
I feel like that's

607
00:31:41,208 --> 00:31:41,928
one of those things

608
00:31:41,928 --> 00:31:43,188
that people think

609
00:31:43,188 --> 00:31:43,988
they wouldn't want to know

610
00:31:43,988 --> 00:31:44,648
what it feels like

611
00:31:44,648 --> 00:31:45,468
and then they find out

612
00:31:45,468 --> 00:31:46,028
and then they're like

613
00:31:46,028 --> 00:31:46,588
oh crap

614
00:31:46,588 --> 00:31:47,708
I can't unfeel this

615
00:31:47,708 --> 00:31:48,308
it's the worst feeling

616
00:31:48,308 --> 00:31:48,788
in the world

617
00:31:48,788 --> 00:31:49,988
well now I'm addicted

618
00:31:49,988 --> 00:31:52,488
they went two different

619
00:31:52,488 --> 00:31:53,208
routes on that one

620
00:31:53,208 --> 00:31:54,988
what about something

621
00:31:54,988 --> 00:31:55,468
with animals

622
00:31:55,468 --> 00:31:56,948
because people are scared

623
00:31:56,948 --> 00:31:57,308
of

624
00:31:57,308 --> 00:31:59,188
like you know

625
00:31:59,188 --> 00:31:59,548
I was talking about

626
00:31:59,548 --> 00:32:00,288
the projection of like

627
00:32:00,288 --> 00:32:00,788
the spiders

628
00:32:00,788 --> 00:32:02,308
I didn't say spiders

629
00:32:02,308 --> 00:32:05,188
What if it was like spiders

630
00:32:05,188 --> 00:32:05,728
Or

631
00:32:05,728 --> 00:32:07,988
I don't know reptiles

632
00:32:07,988 --> 00:32:09,488
I thought you meant like pretend like

633
00:32:09,488 --> 00:32:12,588
How people have a fake dog barking noise

634
00:32:12,588 --> 00:32:13,908
Oh yeah

635
00:32:13,908 --> 00:32:15,328
No I wasn't thinking that

636
00:32:15,328 --> 00:32:16,768
I was thinking like

637
00:32:16,768 --> 00:32:19,708
This is my pet spider he's gonna get you

638
00:32:19,708 --> 00:32:24,388
Yeah

639
00:32:24,388 --> 00:32:25,088
I mean

640
00:32:25,088 --> 00:32:27,828
Is there an animal that would scare you?

641
00:32:27,828 --> 00:32:37,028
um well i i think i've told you before i might even sit on pod i often have dreams where alligators

642
00:32:37,028 --> 00:32:43,688
or crocodiles i don't know what are are like in the room and i can't get away from like i am

643
00:32:43,688 --> 00:32:50,748
like i feel like they're gonna attack me imminently i don't know why okay that that would be that see

644
00:32:50,748 --> 00:32:56,348
that's scary though because it's like if you see now i think the human brain right if you see an

645
00:32:56,348 --> 00:33:05,068
alligator even if it's not real for you like out of there anything that startles like your reptile

646
00:33:05,068 --> 00:33:10,248
like if you're not expecting it like do you ever like sometimes see a shadow that you think is like

647
00:33:10,248 --> 00:33:16,248
and you're like oh yeah and then take but it's still like if if something enters your vision

648
00:33:16,248 --> 00:33:22,428
that is unexpected your brain makes makes like sense of it in a way to see if it like is dangerous

649
00:33:22,428 --> 00:33:24,448
to you. So it like looks for ways it could be

650
00:33:24,448 --> 00:33:26,148
dangerous. So I think that's why you

651
00:33:26,148 --> 00:33:28,428
like think it could be this.

652
00:33:28,548 --> 00:33:29,988
Yeah. Because like your brain's trying to save you.

653
00:33:30,268 --> 00:33:31,788
Yeah. And if you see an alligator or a crocodile,

654
00:33:32,148 --> 00:33:34,448
that's going to get triggered immediately. It's not going to get

655
00:33:34,448 --> 00:33:36,388
triggered probably

656
00:33:36,388 --> 00:33:37,148
by a little spider.

657
00:33:38,408 --> 00:33:40,128
Yeah. The cat. Right.

658
00:33:40,188 --> 00:33:41,668
Tree frog. Yeah. Iguanas.

659
00:33:42,708 --> 00:33:43,988
Well, an iguana. It might

660
00:33:43,988 --> 00:33:46,348
startle me for a second, but I won't be like scared

661
00:33:46,348 --> 00:33:48,368
scared. Yeah, but you've been

662
00:33:48,368 --> 00:33:49,668
conditioned because we did that scene

663
00:33:49,668 --> 00:33:52,148
where our son

664
00:33:52,148 --> 00:34:02,088
you don't talk about we did we did a part part iguana wasn't wouldn't wait wait oh yeah and we

665
00:34:02,088 --> 00:34:09,028
kept like the last scene was we send him to school yeah yeah that's right yeah well uh

666
00:34:09,028 --> 00:34:15,868
i do like this i think it'll work i think people will buy it thank you um and i hope

667
00:34:15,868 --> 00:34:20,648
i hope everyone remembers to put everyone on the white list that's supposed to be on there

668
00:34:20,648 --> 00:34:23,608
so they don't get friends and family members shot.

669
00:34:24,208 --> 00:34:24,228
Right.

670
00:34:24,328 --> 00:34:26,168
Well, there's extensive waiver, so we're good.

671
00:34:26,408 --> 00:34:26,888
Okay, cool.

672
00:34:26,928 --> 00:34:27,748
As long as we're not liable.

673
00:34:27,808 --> 00:34:28,288
Yeah, we're good.

674
00:34:28,488 --> 00:34:28,808
All right.

675
00:34:30,288 --> 00:34:32,408
Scared Secure, Boo Casa.

676
00:34:34,648 --> 00:34:36,028
All of these are available now.

677
00:34:36,648 --> 00:34:37,788
Go to veryfinefriends.com.

678
00:34:37,968 --> 00:34:38,188
Yep.

679
00:34:38,668 --> 00:34:40,948
To set up a home consultation.

680
00:34:41,288 --> 00:34:42,048
Start your background check.

681
00:34:42,268 --> 00:34:42,468
Yep.

682
00:34:42,888 --> 00:34:43,288
Start your house.

683
00:34:43,344 --> 00:34:44,524
I know.

684
00:34:44,744 --> 00:34:45,904
No, your house has a felony.

685
00:34:46,404 --> 00:34:46,924
Sorry.

686
00:34:47,964 --> 00:34:50,724
Well, that wraps up the invention of the week.

687
00:34:52,624 --> 00:34:53,144
Okay.

688
00:34:53,624 --> 00:34:57,004
It's time for our next segment, and I'm very excited for this one.

689
00:34:58,384 --> 00:35:00,004
Dennis or DeVito.

690
00:35:01,664 --> 00:35:07,824
It's time for another episode of America's favorite game show, Dennis or DeVito.

691
00:35:10,124 --> 00:35:12,084
Joe, do you want to explain this segment?

692
00:35:12,084 --> 00:35:14,044
I would love to explain this segment.

693
00:35:15,384 --> 00:35:21,064
So listeners, last night I had the pleasure of meeting over the phone

694
00:35:21,064 --> 00:35:23,784
the wonderful Dennis.

695
00:35:24,884 --> 00:35:25,624
Bleep it.

696
00:35:25,884 --> 00:35:26,624
We'll bleep that out.

697
00:35:27,484 --> 00:35:28,044
Yeah.

698
00:35:30,324 --> 00:35:32,784
And yeah, I asked him.

699
00:35:33,404 --> 00:35:34,164
Francis's dad.

700
00:35:34,484 --> 00:35:35,344
Five questions.

701
00:35:35,544 --> 00:35:37,304
I asked Francis's dad five questions.

702
00:35:37,864 --> 00:35:41,224
And yeah, I got some choice quotes from the interaction

703
00:35:41,224 --> 00:35:44,944
and we're going to be comparing those against quotes from Danny DeVito.

704
00:35:45,104 --> 00:35:49,084
And I'm going to see if Jenna and Francis can tell who said what.

705
00:35:49,984 --> 00:35:50,244
Okay.

706
00:35:50,564 --> 00:35:52,744
So we're going to, are we both voting?

707
00:35:53,744 --> 00:35:54,064
Yes.

708
00:35:54,364 --> 00:35:54,704
All right.

709
00:35:55,064 --> 00:35:59,244
Listeners, Jenna and Francis each have little cards in their hand,

710
00:35:59,344 --> 00:36:01,084
one that says Dennis and one that says DeVito.

711
00:36:01,284 --> 00:36:02,764
They're going to be voting.

712
00:36:03,284 --> 00:36:05,084
So you'll have to tell the audience how we voted.

713
00:36:05,724 --> 00:36:06,164
Well, yeah.

714
00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:10,564
This is just so that we both know

715
00:36:10,564 --> 00:36:12,424
we're not influencing each other's answers.

716
00:36:12,624 --> 00:36:15,124
We lock in our answer, then we'll say what our answer is.

717
00:36:15,124 --> 00:36:15,944
Three, two, one.

718
00:36:16,864 --> 00:36:18,024
God bless, God bless.

719
00:36:21,084 --> 00:36:21,724
Alright.

720
00:36:23,724 --> 00:36:24,624
Starting off.

721
00:36:26,944 --> 00:36:28,244
I'll tell you one thing.

722
00:36:28,444 --> 00:36:30,064
It's a cruel, cruel world.

723
00:36:30,064 --> 00:36:40,124
um tick tock tick tock tick tock okay i have my answer locked in okay all right three two one

724
00:36:40,124 --> 00:36:47,624
shoot devito that's a devito that's a devito quote what was what was the what was that in

725
00:36:47,624 --> 00:36:56,084
response to or from i don't know goodreads.com didn't give me the context okay okay did my dad

726
00:36:56,084 --> 00:36:58,704
say anything? Can you tell us what the other one was?

727
00:36:59,564 --> 00:37:01,044
Or did you not do it that way?

728
00:37:01,364 --> 00:37:06,164
I got the DeVito quotes first and then I asked him

729
00:37:06,164 --> 00:37:09,304
questions that would prompt him to give responses

730
00:37:09,304 --> 00:37:09,984
that are similar.

731
00:37:12,484 --> 00:37:17,304
The key to parenting is don't be mean, just be honest

732
00:37:17,304 --> 00:37:18,364
and make sure they go to school.

733
00:37:26,084 --> 00:37:26,504
I'm ready.

734
00:37:27,704 --> 00:37:28,964
Okay, I'm ready too.

735
00:37:29,364 --> 00:37:30,724
Three, two, one.

736
00:37:32,364 --> 00:37:32,804
Dennis.

737
00:37:33,004 --> 00:37:33,564
It's Dennis.

738
00:37:33,744 --> 00:37:34,004
What?

739
00:37:34,004 --> 00:37:34,304
Wow.

740
00:37:36,644 --> 00:37:38,284
And Francis Gastevito.

741
00:37:38,524 --> 00:37:39,484
That's so funny.

742
00:37:40,304 --> 00:37:42,564
That you got the one about parenting wrong.

743
00:37:42,684 --> 00:37:44,724
Well, because he said, don't be mean.

744
00:37:44,864 --> 00:37:47,424
I think that maybe threw Francis off.

745
00:37:47,424 --> 00:37:48,504
I was like, I know.

746
00:37:48,764 --> 00:37:50,264
You knew I was going down on this.

747
00:37:50,604 --> 00:37:52,944
Well, I was like, when he said that, I was like,

748
00:37:52,964 --> 00:37:55,944
I could think of three stories right now.

749
00:37:56,084 --> 00:37:58,884
where Francis was like, I was so mean to my dad.

750
00:38:00,644 --> 00:38:02,104
Or the other way around.

751
00:38:02,224 --> 00:38:02,604
He was mean to me.

752
00:38:02,744 --> 00:38:02,964
Yeah.

753
00:38:04,864 --> 00:38:05,924
A load of shit.

754
00:38:08,304 --> 00:38:09,504
I love women.

755
00:38:09,724 --> 00:38:11,644
I used to get in all kinds of trouble.

756
00:38:14,484 --> 00:38:16,564
You're setting me up.

757
00:38:18,964 --> 00:38:20,224
Okay, well, I have my answer.

758
00:38:20,224 --> 00:38:20,624
Okay.

759
00:38:24,944 --> 00:38:25,504
Francis?

760
00:38:25,504 --> 00:38:26,084
I'm ready.

761
00:38:27,284 --> 00:38:27,584
Shoot.

762
00:38:28,164 --> 00:38:28,724
Dennis.

763
00:38:29,324 --> 00:38:30,884
You're both wrong.

764
00:38:31,264 --> 00:38:31,304
No.

765
00:38:31,304 --> 00:38:32,044
It's Danny DeVito.

766
00:38:33,204 --> 00:38:33,504
Oh.

767
00:38:33,764 --> 00:38:33,864
Wow.

768
00:38:34,304 --> 00:38:35,424
Maybe they're really similar.

769
00:38:36,544 --> 00:38:37,844
I, yeah.

770
00:38:38,044 --> 00:38:39,364
I kind of got that impression.

771
00:38:40,944 --> 00:38:48,344
Oh, I have such a, I have such a favorite Dennis memory that involves ladies.

772
00:38:48,584 --> 00:38:54,224
Well, I mean, I haven't met him, but, but I can't, I don't know if I should, I shouldn't

773
00:38:54,224 --> 00:38:56,164
say it on. There was that one time

774
00:38:56,164 --> 00:38:58,424
we were out. We were at the theater

775
00:38:58,424 --> 00:38:59,824
for sketch practice.

776
00:39:00,024 --> 00:39:01,404
Oh, that one.

777
00:39:01,784 --> 00:39:04,464
You got an alert on your phone.

778
00:39:04,624 --> 00:39:06,004
I had to call and be like, stop it.

779
00:39:06,704 --> 00:39:06,944
Yeah.

780
00:39:08,624 --> 00:39:09,864
Stop using the internet.

781
00:39:11,084 --> 00:39:11,844
But just

782
00:39:11,844 --> 00:39:14,004
the website that he went to

783
00:39:14,004 --> 00:39:15,244
was so funny to me.

784
00:39:15,244 --> 00:39:15,504
Yeah.

785
00:39:19,024 --> 00:39:20,544
Listeners, if you want to know what it is,

786
00:39:20,604 --> 00:39:22,204
you're going to have to donate

787
00:39:22,204 --> 00:39:23,704
$465

788
00:39:23,704 --> 00:39:25,484
and we'll tell you.

789
00:39:26,024 --> 00:39:27,124
In small bills.

790
00:39:27,964 --> 00:39:29,324
Yes. Unmarked.

791
00:39:29,644 --> 00:39:31,864
They can be marked. Or DM us

792
00:39:31,864 --> 00:39:33,324
at Very Fine Friends

793
00:39:33,324 --> 00:39:35,464
on socials and then...

794
00:39:35,464 --> 00:39:36,804
If you're hot, we'll tell you. Yeah.

795
00:39:36,904 --> 00:39:39,004
And then I'll send you a link.

796
00:39:40,224 --> 00:39:40,904
Yeah, click it.

797
00:39:42,704 --> 00:39:43,664
We'll act it out

798
00:39:43,664 --> 00:39:44,124
for you.

799
00:39:45,964 --> 00:39:47,724
All right. We've got to come back

800
00:39:47,724 --> 00:39:48,764
on this. Okay.

801
00:39:48,764 --> 00:39:50,764
If you're going to have kids,

802
00:39:51,024 --> 00:39:52,984
they have to know they're the most important

803
00:39:52,984 --> 00:40:01,204
thing in your life i would have gone okay well francis instantly held up devito which is correct

804
00:40:01,204 --> 00:40:07,764
oh and i said dennis i'm thrown off by his parenting advice i know that that was all right

805
00:40:07,764 --> 00:40:14,404
so we're back even again we both got the first one right i got the second one right you neither

806
00:40:14,404 --> 00:40:18,684
one of us got the third one and you get the fourth one all right just the last one just

807
00:40:18,684 --> 00:40:20,484
I know this is going by so fast.

808
00:40:20,544 --> 00:40:21,584
I want like 80 of these.

809
00:40:22,264 --> 00:40:23,644
No, I got a good amount.

810
00:40:24,064 --> 00:40:24,544
I got a good amount.

811
00:40:24,624 --> 00:40:25,304
I said you had five.

812
00:40:25,504 --> 00:40:26,324
I thought you said you had five.

813
00:40:26,524 --> 00:40:28,144
I asked him five questions, but.

814
00:40:28,444 --> 00:40:29,104
Oh, but you have a bunch of.

815
00:40:29,204 --> 00:40:29,664
Okay, cool.

816
00:40:29,924 --> 00:40:30,104
Yeah.

817
00:40:31,564 --> 00:40:32,024
Let me.

818
00:40:32,524 --> 00:40:32,764
Let's.

819
00:40:33,384 --> 00:40:33,584
Let me.

820
00:40:34,204 --> 00:40:34,804
I don't know what.

821
00:40:34,904 --> 00:40:35,164
The points.

822
00:40:35,344 --> 00:40:35,544
Yeah.

823
00:40:37,484 --> 00:40:37,804
Okay.

824
00:40:39,344 --> 00:40:39,664
Okay.

825
00:40:40,504 --> 00:40:41,024
Keep going.

826
00:40:41,824 --> 00:40:42,084
Okay.

827
00:40:47,404 --> 00:40:48,624
When you treat your kids right,

828
00:40:48,684 --> 00:40:50,144
They just give you stuff constantly.

829
00:40:54,664 --> 00:40:55,064
Okay.

830
00:40:55,124 --> 00:40:56,104
I have my answer locked in.

831
00:40:56,104 --> 00:40:56,944
Me too.

832
00:40:58,164 --> 00:40:58,524
Draw.

833
00:40:59,724 --> 00:41:00,124
Dennis.

834
00:41:00,884 --> 00:41:01,324
DeVito.

835
00:41:02,104 --> 00:41:03,184
Oh, good job, Francis.

836
00:41:03,424 --> 00:41:04,544
I loved when I saw that one.

837
00:41:04,604 --> 00:41:05,584
I was like, this is perfect.

838
00:41:05,864 --> 00:41:08,944
This sounds exactly like Dennis.

839
00:41:11,784 --> 00:41:15,524
I know his kid and he gives him stuff constantly and hates it.

840
00:41:15,524 --> 00:41:19,664
yes and he doesn't enjoy giving him

841
00:41:19,664 --> 00:41:20,444
the stuff

842
00:41:20,444 --> 00:41:24,144
love you dad

843
00:41:24,144 --> 00:41:27,244
he's not listening

844
00:41:27,244 --> 00:41:31,964
I'm a strong guy I've had to deal

845
00:41:31,964 --> 00:41:34,044
with plenty of ups and downs it's like a roller coaster

846
00:41:34,044 --> 00:41:36,064
but you have to stay with the grind don't give up

847
00:41:41,584 --> 00:41:42,024
okay

848
00:41:42,024 --> 00:41:42,984
I have my answer

849
00:41:42,984 --> 00:41:44,664
okay go

850
00:41:44,664 --> 00:41:45,584
Dennis

851
00:41:45,584 --> 00:41:47,244
It's Dennis

852
00:41:47,244 --> 00:41:48,744
We both got it right

853
00:41:48,744 --> 00:41:49,724
Some words of wisdom

854
00:41:49,724 --> 00:41:51,844
From the man himself

855
00:41:51,844 --> 00:41:58,504
Uh

856
00:41:58,504 --> 00:42:01,104
Are you

857
00:42:01,104 --> 00:42:02,304
Women

858
00:42:02,304 --> 00:42:04,144
We can't live with them

859
00:42:04,144 --> 00:42:05,864
But we certainly can't live without them

860
00:42:05,864 --> 00:42:09,304
Ready

861
00:42:09,304 --> 00:42:12,184
Yeah

862
00:42:12,184 --> 00:42:14,884
yeah,

863
00:42:15,484 --> 00:42:16,204
I'm ready.

864
00:42:17,464 --> 00:42:17,904
Draw.

865
00:42:18,564 --> 00:42:19,064
DeVito.

866
00:42:20,484 --> 00:42:20,764
Nope.

867
00:42:21,184 --> 00:42:21,424
Dennis?

868
00:42:22,004 --> 00:42:22,264
Mm-hmm.

869
00:42:23,364 --> 00:42:23,844
Dang.

870
00:42:24,224 --> 00:42:25,704
And I went against my instinct.

871
00:42:25,824 --> 00:42:27,004
I want to just guess all of Dennis

872
00:42:27,004 --> 00:42:27,804
for all of them.

873
00:42:32,404 --> 00:42:32,884
Okay,

874
00:42:33,144 --> 00:42:33,664
there we go.

875
00:42:35,204 --> 00:42:36,124
I'm in Brooklyn

876
00:42:36,124 --> 00:42:36,984
and I'm all alone

877
00:42:36,984 --> 00:42:38,004
at a big hotel suite

878
00:42:38,004 --> 00:42:39,444
and the thing sticks in.

879
00:42:40,204 --> 00:42:41,424
Can I finish the quote,

880
00:42:41,544 --> 00:42:41,824
please?

881
00:42:42,184 --> 00:42:45,564
I'm in Brooklyn.

882
00:42:45,744 --> 00:42:49,164
I'm all alone in a big hotel suite and the thing sticks in my foot.

883
00:42:49,304 --> 00:42:51,744
And it's just the funniest thing that's ever happened to me.

884
00:42:55,524 --> 00:42:56,064
You ready?

885
00:42:56,184 --> 00:42:57,944
This is the actual quote, by the way, verbatim.

886
00:42:58,024 --> 00:42:58,264
Okay.

887
00:43:02,904 --> 00:43:03,304
Okay.

888
00:43:05,704 --> 00:43:06,104
Dennis.

889
00:43:06,764 --> 00:43:07,824
It's Tang to me now.

890
00:43:07,984 --> 00:43:08,964
Oh, Tang.

891
00:43:10,224 --> 00:43:11,544
Okay, Francis got that one right.

892
00:43:12,184 --> 00:43:14,184
Why were you laughing so hard?

893
00:43:14,184 --> 00:43:16,184
Because I don't know if he's ever been to Brooklyn.

894
00:43:16,184 --> 00:43:17,184
Oh, really?

895
00:43:17,184 --> 00:43:18,184
Yeah.

896
00:43:18,184 --> 00:43:29,433
From New York He from upstate New York Yeah but He been to New York City I don know if he in Brooklyn It right there What are you doing Just go It right there

897
00:43:29,533 --> 00:43:31,233
Look, it's right there. Just get on the train.

898
00:43:31,293 --> 00:43:31,593
Just go.

899
00:43:35,213 --> 00:43:37,033
I was at American Idol. I wanted to sit down

900
00:43:37,033 --> 00:43:38,653
and watch the performances and of course

901
00:43:38,653 --> 00:43:40,953
they found me within

902
00:43:40,953 --> 00:43:42,953
seconds and let me know I was in the completely wrong

903
00:43:42,953 --> 00:43:44,253
seat. Brought me to the right one.

904
00:43:44,253 --> 00:43:49,913
oh man this is

905
00:43:50,913 --> 00:43:53,633
tough

906
00:43:53,633 --> 00:43:56,493
what's so funny about this is

907
00:43:56,493 --> 00:44:01,533
that this should be the easiest one to do

908
00:44:01,533 --> 00:44:06,073
because it's like well I know like every like I would go that's not my dad

909
00:44:06,073 --> 00:44:08,693
my dad's never been to a taping of American Idol

910
00:44:08,693 --> 00:44:11,133
but Dennis has

911
00:44:11,133 --> 00:44:13,093
okay

912
00:44:13,093 --> 00:44:16,073
alright

913
00:44:16,073 --> 00:44:18,033
this one's just

914
00:44:18,033 --> 00:44:21,053
okay well I got my answer

915
00:44:21,053 --> 00:44:21,753
okay

916
00:44:21,753 --> 00:44:23,993
you do?

917
00:44:24,533 --> 00:44:26,193
yeah alright me too

918
00:44:26,193 --> 00:44:27,953
ready?

919
00:44:28,253 --> 00:44:28,733
reveal

920
00:44:28,733 --> 00:44:30,493
Dennis

921
00:44:30,493 --> 00:44:33,133
we both got it right

922
00:44:33,133 --> 00:44:39,153
so he was in the wrong seat

923
00:44:39,153 --> 00:44:39,853
at American Idol

924
00:44:39,853 --> 00:44:46,613
okay so i asked him just like tell me a funnier entertaining story from like

925
00:44:46,613 --> 00:44:54,233
a place that you've traveled to before and then he goes funny story funny story

926
00:44:54,233 --> 00:45:02,213
well i was i was in la and i went to american idol and and i i sat in the completely wrong seat

927
00:45:02,213 --> 00:45:07,193
and then they found me and then i i got picked to to go because they wanted me to do the danny

928
00:45:07,193 --> 00:45:08,033
DeVito commercial.

929
00:45:08,573 --> 00:45:11,093
I was like, I gotta find

930
00:45:11,093 --> 00:45:12,053
something to use here.

931
00:45:13,073 --> 00:45:14,993
It's so funny that he just brought up

932
00:45:14,993 --> 00:45:17,153
American Idol. The last time

933
00:45:17,153 --> 00:45:18,573
we did that, I think I was

934
00:45:18,573 --> 00:45:20,053
18.

935
00:45:21,433 --> 00:45:23,133
Well, I woke up in a

936
00:45:23,133 --> 00:45:24,493
bed and I stumbled in the kitchen.

937
00:45:24,833 --> 00:45:26,673
He just must have made a huge impression on him.

938
00:45:27,353 --> 00:45:27,713
Maybe.

939
00:45:28,893 --> 00:45:29,253
Maybe.

940
00:45:30,753 --> 00:45:33,073
You got the point. Just two years

941
00:45:33,073 --> 00:45:34,613
ago. I know.

942
00:45:34,613 --> 00:45:35,173
Yeah.

943
00:45:35,173 --> 00:45:38,013
a little ingenue you

944
00:45:38,013 --> 00:45:45,813
I'll watch Ricky Gervais

945
00:45:45,813 --> 00:45:46,833
anything he does

946
00:45:46,833 --> 00:45:52,113
I'm ready

947
00:45:52,113 --> 00:45:53,873
okay I'm ready too

948
00:45:53,873 --> 00:45:55,233
one two three

949
00:45:55,233 --> 00:45:55,873
DeVito

950
00:45:55,873 --> 00:45:56,573
yeah

951
00:45:56,573 --> 00:45:58,953
I'm reasonably sure my dad does not know that name

952
00:45:58,953 --> 00:46:00,013
really

953
00:46:00,013 --> 00:46:00,493
yeah

954
00:46:00,493 --> 00:46:03,873
oh you're winning by two

955
00:46:03,873 --> 00:46:04,693
oh my god

956
00:46:04,693 --> 00:46:08,953
I'm self-centered.

957
00:46:09,133 --> 00:46:10,353
I just adore myself.

958
00:46:19,093 --> 00:46:25,693
Listeners, let the record reflect that Francis is taking quite a heavy moment of reflection on this one.

959
00:46:26,613 --> 00:46:27,313
I'm ready.

960
00:46:27,593 --> 00:46:27,813
Okay.

961
00:46:28,093 --> 00:46:28,353
Okay.

962
00:46:28,853 --> 00:46:30,213
Three, two, one.

963
00:46:30,353 --> 00:46:30,953
Oh my God.

964
00:46:31,213 --> 00:46:31,893
I was going to say DeVito.

965
00:46:32,513 --> 00:46:33,213
This is DeVito.

966
00:46:33,473 --> 00:46:33,993
Oh.

967
00:46:34,353 --> 00:46:34,573
Okay.

968
00:46:34,693 --> 00:46:42,333
man falling behind everything sounds like dennis to me everything reminds me of him

969
00:46:42,333 --> 00:46:52,473
uh kevin hart is my favorite comedian without a doubt that's a name he might know this is tough

970
00:46:52,473 --> 00:47:00,153
did you ask what was the lead up no we can no no okay all right all right

971
00:47:00,153 --> 00:47:02,053
I just pulled a bunch of quotes.

972
00:47:04,833 --> 00:47:05,553
All right.

973
00:47:07,113 --> 00:47:08,773
One, two, three.

974
00:47:08,973 --> 00:47:09,273
Dennis.

975
00:47:10,053 --> 00:47:10,293
Yeah.

976
00:47:10,573 --> 00:47:11,973
Oh, really?

977
00:47:12,153 --> 00:47:12,853
Yeah, it is.

978
00:47:12,993 --> 00:47:13,533
Yeah, it's good.

979
00:47:13,633 --> 00:47:16,133
He said, I love him because he's five, two like me.

980
00:47:16,973 --> 00:47:18,553
I should have seen that coming.

981
00:47:22,973 --> 00:47:27,413
I even thought about including that, but then I was like, wait, is Danny DeVito five, two?

982
00:47:27,413 --> 00:47:28,933
He's like, no, he's like four, ten.

983
00:47:29,133 --> 00:47:29,273
Yeah.

984
00:47:29,273 --> 00:47:31,073
So I was like, all right, well, I can't include that.

985
00:47:32,033 --> 00:47:32,633
All right.

986
00:47:35,513 --> 00:47:36,193
Last one.

987
00:47:36,253 --> 00:47:36,713
You guys ready?

988
00:47:36,933 --> 00:47:37,193
Yeah.

989
00:47:37,333 --> 00:47:41,453
Well, I can't win, but I still want to play.

990
00:47:41,593 --> 00:47:42,213
But you participated.

991
00:47:42,213 --> 00:47:43,953
We can make the last one worth five points.

992
00:47:45,013 --> 00:47:45,373
Okay.

993
00:47:46,273 --> 00:47:48,473
Last one for a whopping five points.

994
00:47:54,033 --> 00:47:54,593
All right.

995
00:47:54,653 --> 00:47:55,093
You guys ready?

996
00:47:55,253 --> 00:47:55,493
Yeah.

997
00:47:56,533 --> 00:47:58,633
My son's name is Francis and he lives in Arizona.

998
00:47:59,273 --> 00:48:02,493
I love everyone.

999
00:48:02,493 --> 00:48:04,393
I love everyone that I work with on.

1000
00:48:04,473 --> 00:48:05,113
It's always sunny.

1001
00:48:09,293 --> 00:48:10,133
You know what?

1002
00:48:12,833 --> 00:48:14,993
I'm sticking in my guns here.

1003
00:48:15,213 --> 00:48:15,573
Me too.

1004
00:48:15,733 --> 00:48:15,893
Ready?

1005
00:48:16,633 --> 00:48:17,113
Dennis.

1006
00:48:19,073 --> 00:48:19,553
Yes.

1007
00:48:20,473 --> 00:48:21,813
We both got it right.

1008
00:48:21,893 --> 00:48:22,633
It was Dennis.

1009
00:48:25,293 --> 00:48:27,373
Love it.

1010
00:48:27,373 --> 00:48:32,493
So now that the game has been played, what were the questions that you asked?

1011
00:48:32,833 --> 00:48:39,913
Well, the first one I mentioned was, what's a funny or entertaining story from somewhere you traveled?

1012
00:48:40,273 --> 00:48:42,513
And he gave me that pig and lipstick.

1013
00:48:42,993 --> 00:48:50,033
But second one was, what's the secret to parenting?

1014
00:48:50,673 --> 00:48:54,013
And that's when he said, don't be mean, just be honest and make sure he goes to school.

1015
00:48:54,013 --> 00:49:03,153
um what's the third one oh yeah what's a what's your coping mechanism for like stress or when

1016
00:49:03,153 --> 00:49:15,233
life gets difficult um and then I asked him the fourth one was just give me like a one to two

1017
00:49:15,233 --> 00:49:20,213
minute like manifesto on like your thoughts about women like the female of the species

1018
00:49:20,213 --> 00:49:23,233
and he just goes, women are wonderful.

1019
00:49:23,973 --> 00:49:24,833
Can't live with them.

1020
00:49:24,913 --> 00:49:26,493
You certainly can't live without them.

1021
00:49:26,753 --> 00:49:27,773
I'm like, yeah, great.

1022
00:49:28,133 --> 00:49:28,473
Thanks.

1023
00:49:29,113 --> 00:49:31,473
Such sage and unspoken words about women.

1024
00:49:31,833 --> 00:49:32,773
To the gay kid.

1025
00:49:33,013 --> 00:49:33,233
Yeah.

1026
00:49:34,253 --> 00:49:37,093
It's like, you're doing just fine without women.

1027
00:49:37,293 --> 00:49:37,553
Yeah.

1028
00:49:39,553 --> 00:49:41,853
I presented some mask over the phone.

1029
00:49:41,973 --> 00:49:43,853
I was like, maybe he'll be proud of me.

1030
00:49:44,353 --> 00:49:45,613
Will you be my son?

1031
00:49:47,913 --> 00:49:49,173
I'll send you to school.

1032
00:49:49,173 --> 00:49:50,433
I won't be mean

1033
00:49:50,433 --> 00:49:51,273
I'll be honest

1034
00:49:51,273 --> 00:49:53,933
and then the last one was just who's your favorite comedian

1035
00:49:53,933 --> 00:49:56,893
because I already had the Ricky Gervais one

1036
00:49:56,893 --> 00:49:57,393
interesting

1037
00:49:57,393 --> 00:49:59,753
well thanks for doing the hard journalism

1038
00:49:59,753 --> 00:50:00,313
yes

1039
00:50:00,313 --> 00:50:00,713
yeah

1040
00:50:00,713 --> 00:50:06,513
that must have been a fun time for you

1041
00:50:06,513 --> 00:50:07,293
it was fun

1042
00:50:07,293 --> 00:50:09,673
it was fun to talk to him

1043
00:50:09,673 --> 00:50:11,233
just because he's a mythic creature

1044
00:50:11,233 --> 00:50:13,273
but I absolutely

1045
00:50:13,273 --> 00:50:15,293
hate talking on the phone

1046
00:50:15,293 --> 00:50:18,053
especially with someone that I haven't met before

1047
00:50:18,053 --> 00:50:19,153
like something that I don't know,

1048
00:50:19,253 --> 00:50:21,473
like just feels so awkward.

1049
00:50:21,473 --> 00:50:21,933
And like,

1050
00:50:21,953 --> 00:50:22,513
I hate it.

1051
00:50:22,673 --> 00:50:22,833
Yeah.

1052
00:50:24,253 --> 00:50:24,693
Yeah.

1053
00:50:24,773 --> 00:50:24,933
Well,

1054
00:50:24,933 --> 00:50:26,013
thank you for doing the work.

1055
00:50:26,393 --> 00:50:27,253
I appreciate it.

1056
00:50:28,393 --> 00:50:31,573
That wraps up Dennis or DeVito.

1057
00:50:34,793 --> 00:50:35,553
Thank you,

1058
00:50:35,653 --> 00:50:35,993
Dennis.

1059
00:50:39,413 --> 00:50:41,573
One final segment time.

1060
00:50:43,573 --> 00:50:44,093
Francis.

1061
00:50:44,553 --> 00:50:44,833
Yeah.

1062
00:50:45,873 --> 00:50:47,633
It's time for the big question.

1063
00:50:48,053 --> 00:50:51,073
The question is very big.

1064
00:50:52,233 --> 00:50:55,333
What are the odds you have a big question?

1065
00:50:55,813 --> 00:50:56,393
I don't know, love.

1066
00:50:56,473 --> 00:50:57,633
You're looking for a big one?

1067
00:50:57,833 --> 00:50:58,913
A huge one, please.

1068
00:50:59,073 --> 00:51:01,073
A question that's humongous.

1069
00:51:02,133 --> 00:51:05,133
So big, it can't fit in this house.

1070
00:51:05,353 --> 00:51:06,313
All right, all right.

1071
00:51:08,893 --> 00:51:10,133
I do have a question.

1072
00:51:10,473 --> 00:51:10,713
Great.

1073
00:51:12,093 --> 00:51:15,093
You know how there's, like, people who, like, stand on the street,

1074
00:51:15,193 --> 00:51:16,913
sometimes on a soapbox, and they're, like, a prophet?

1075
00:51:17,233 --> 00:51:17,513
Yeah.

1076
00:51:17,513 --> 00:51:21,333
Like in the hit film life or something like it starring Angelina Jolie and

1077
00:51:21,333 --> 00:51:21,673
Monk.

1078
00:51:23,693 --> 00:51:25,953
My favorite actor,

1079
00:51:26,073 --> 00:51:26,333
Monk.

1080
00:51:28,113 --> 00:51:33,533
My question is how would you convince people that you were a legitimate

1081
00:51:33,533 --> 00:51:33,973
prophet?

1082
00:51:33,973 --> 00:51:41,093
And then what would you do with that information to like pull a big con?

1083
00:51:41,093 --> 00:51:50,113
I love how so many of our big questions

1084
00:51:50,113 --> 00:51:51,873
are just centered around the concept of like

1085
00:51:51,873 --> 00:51:54,853
how would you trick a large number of people

1086
00:51:54,853 --> 00:51:56,153
into thinking this thing

1087
00:51:56,153 --> 00:51:59,253
and money and technology is no object

1088
00:51:59,253 --> 00:52:09,442
what else is there are money and technology no object I think Joe has answered that question Okay

1089
00:52:10,002 --> 00:52:11,482
They never have been before,

1090
00:52:11,662 --> 00:52:14,622
miss third grade field trip to the Louvre.

1091
00:52:15,762 --> 00:52:18,342
Miss commandeer a cruise ship.

1092
00:52:20,782 --> 00:52:24,382
And send all of the Six Flags employees on the cruise ship.

1093
00:52:24,982 --> 00:52:26,882
Surprisingly cheaper than you'd think.

1094
00:52:27,482 --> 00:52:28,262
Group discounts.

1095
00:52:28,262 --> 00:52:29,543
It was a Groupon.

1096
00:52:30,002 --> 00:52:40,762
Um, okay. All right.

1097
00:52:43,822 --> 00:52:50,742
So I need people to become bewitched by me, essentially.

1098
00:52:50,742 --> 00:53:00,642
and all right they need they need to fully believe whatever i say

1099
00:53:00,642 --> 00:53:08,683
uh okay well let's

1100
00:53:08,683 --> 00:53:17,002
let's start well so i like this cruise ship was thrown out let's do let's do something with a

1101
00:53:17,002 --> 00:53:25,882
cruise ship. So I would go on a cruise like a regular passenger. See, I would have it be.

1102
00:53:28,943 --> 00:53:34,303
Who's the most gullible? I think boomers and old people are the most gullible,

1103
00:53:34,702 --> 00:53:40,862
the most prone, but people, because whoever, whoever you get first on board needs to be able

1104
00:53:40,862 --> 00:53:45,082
to then get other people on board for you. It's kind of like a pyramid scheme thing with a cult,

1105
00:53:45,082 --> 00:53:50,362
right um they need to convince others so i would say

1106
00:53:50,362 --> 00:53:56,142
i would say

1107
00:53:56,142 --> 00:54:01,002
i'd need a mix i'd need it to be

1108
00:54:01,002 --> 00:54:05,702
it's a grandparents grandkids cruise

1109
00:54:05,702 --> 00:54:14,582
one of those classic grandparents grandkid cruises or yeah screw it it's not a themed cruise

1110
00:54:15,082 --> 00:54:17,043
It's just a regular cruise.

1111
00:54:17,202 --> 00:54:19,362
I am just a regular passenger on this cruise.

1112
00:54:19,362 --> 00:54:32,183
What they don't know is I have paid people to pretend to be pirates

1113
00:54:32,183 --> 00:54:35,602
that were going to take over the cruise.

1114
00:54:36,022 --> 00:54:37,162
So we're all on this cruise.

1115
00:54:37,162 --> 00:54:40,902
and

1116
00:54:40,902 --> 00:54:43,622
I'm going to

1117
00:54:43,622 --> 00:54:45,242
one night at dinner

1118
00:54:45,242 --> 00:54:48,902
and we're all going to

1119
00:54:48,902 --> 00:54:50,803
I'm going to be very sociable

1120
00:54:50,803 --> 00:54:52,303
and having a lot of fun

1121
00:54:52,303 --> 00:54:54,222
this is like a 10 day cruise

1122
00:54:54,222 --> 00:54:55,543
we're in day 5

1123
00:54:55,543 --> 00:54:57,502
so at this point in time

1124
00:54:57,502 --> 00:54:58,722
halfway through the cruise

1125
00:54:58,722 --> 00:55:01,183
I've made 30 new friends

1126
00:55:01,183 --> 00:55:03,183
we're all doing fun stuff together

1127
00:55:03,183 --> 00:55:06,062
all brand new people I've just met

1128
00:55:06,062 --> 00:55:11,342
but we're hanging out. We all eat dinner together. Like it's like we've become this big group. Right.

1129
00:55:13,482 --> 00:55:21,443
And so we're going to be, it's going to be after dinner, we're all going to be sitting around.

1130
00:55:21,522 --> 00:55:29,382
We just had a huge meal. We're going to be waiting for the standup comedian to come on

1131
00:55:29,382 --> 00:55:35,122
because we're, we're doing standup tonight and then we're all going to do karaoke after.

1132
00:55:35,122 --> 00:55:44,702
yes Kevin R or Ricky Gervais and I'm gonna and I'm like a fun lively person right and then so

1133
00:55:44,702 --> 00:55:50,082
like that's what they know about me already but I'm gonna be sitting there in this cruise and

1134
00:55:50,082 --> 00:55:56,602
waiting for the stand-up to come on and be like I it's the weirdest thing I just had this

1135
00:55:56,602 --> 00:56:05,082
this like flash or this vision like something something's something's gonna happen like

1136
00:56:05,082 --> 00:56:07,342
I just, I could see it so clearly, right?

1137
00:56:07,342 --> 00:56:15,402
There was, I could hear screaming and, and, and Tanya, you were, it was like, I saw you,

1138
00:56:15,462 --> 00:56:16,902
you were crying and you were crying.

1139
00:56:17,102 --> 00:56:20,302
And, but there was like people running around and it was daylight.

1140
00:56:20,502 --> 00:56:23,662
So it was, it's not, it's nothing scary at night, but like something bad is going to

1141
00:56:23,662 --> 00:56:24,622
happen on this cruise.

1142
00:56:24,982 --> 00:56:27,482
And this is very out of character for me, right?

1143
00:56:27,502 --> 00:56:29,322
Cause I'm the fun levity.

1144
00:56:29,423 --> 00:56:32,322
And they're like, are you sure you're not just trying to get out of seeing a crappy

1145
00:56:32,322 --> 00:56:32,722
comedian?

1146
00:56:32,962 --> 00:56:35,022
And I'm like, Tanya, you're hilarious.

1147
00:56:35,082 --> 00:56:42,702
you should be up on that stage uh no uh i know this was very real like it was like it was like

1148
00:56:42,702 --> 00:56:47,862
i was there i could see it and i was like there were these strange men with guns and everyone's

1149
00:56:47,862 --> 00:56:51,762
kind of like freaked out it's like it was like the most vivid dream i've ever had except for i

1150
00:56:51,762 --> 00:56:58,642
wasn't asleep and and then they're gonna be like that is weird right and i'm like guys i'm sorry

1151
00:56:58,642 --> 00:57:03,642
this was just so jarring for me you don't mind i don't even think i can do karaoke later i'm just

1152
00:57:03,642 --> 00:57:11,082
going to go, I'm going to go to my bed. Just going to call it a night. Maybe it's something I ate,

1153
00:57:11,142 --> 00:57:19,562
right? Yeah. So then I'm going to leave basically give them a chance to kind of talk about and be

1154
00:57:19,562 --> 00:57:24,423
like, that was weird. Jenna's not normally like that. I hope everything's okay. And then

1155
00:57:24,423 --> 00:57:31,002
the next day is going to go by day six. Everything's great. I'm back to normal.

1156
00:57:31,002 --> 00:57:37,742
the whole thing is back to normal. We're doing a conga line on the deck. Everybody's having fun.

1157
00:57:37,982 --> 00:57:42,022
We're making, you know, putting laser on each other's next, making jokes about getting laid,

1158
00:57:42,183 --> 00:57:50,982
all that fun cruise stuff that I'm assuming people do on cruises. So then the next morning,

1159
00:57:50,982 --> 00:57:55,222
when we're all doing basket weaving.

1160
00:57:56,742 --> 00:58:01,542
That's when the pirates are going to attack.

1161
00:58:02,462 --> 00:58:05,902
And then, so they're going to be boarding this ship

1162
00:58:05,902 --> 00:58:10,782
and suddenly there's men with guns

1163
00:58:10,782 --> 00:58:12,122
and it's all happening.

1164
00:58:12,122 --> 00:58:13,602
I was like, oh my God, I saw that.

1165
00:58:13,802 --> 00:58:14,622
I was like, wait, wait, wait.

1166
00:58:15,362 --> 00:58:16,342
I saw this.

1167
00:58:17,282 --> 00:58:18,382
I know how to stop it.

1168
00:58:18,423 --> 00:58:20,683
And Tanya's crying and she's like, oh my God, I am crying.

1169
00:58:20,683 --> 00:58:26,462
and it's daylight and people are screaming and I'm going to go and I'm going to talk to the pirates

1170
00:58:26,462 --> 00:58:32,183
and I'm going to basically talk them down. I'll be like, pirates, pirates, pirates, pirates.

1171
00:58:37,183 --> 00:58:42,262
You don't need to do this. You don't need to do this. Put your guns down and I'm going to be in a

1172
00:58:42,262 --> 00:58:45,702
very soothing voice. I'm going to be talking to them and they're going to, people are going to

1173
00:58:45,702 --> 00:58:52,702
be watching basically these pirates get kind of like hypnotized by me um and just like as i

1174
00:58:52,702 --> 00:58:59,862
basically what they think is saving all of their lives right so then um

1175
00:59:00,462 --> 00:59:08,542
yeah they're they've they have watched these pirates become bewitched by me so then they

1176
00:59:08,542 --> 00:59:14,423
will in turn be like you know i thought jenna was interesting i thought she was fun but like

1177
00:59:14,423 --> 00:59:22,062
holy crap there's like a whole other level to her right and then so they now have this and then

1178
00:59:22,062 --> 00:59:25,982
we're gonna everyone's like looking at me a little differently now we have the last few days of the

1179
00:59:25,982 --> 00:59:32,862
cruise they're looking at me differently then we all get back to land day 10 and i make sure like

1180
00:59:32,862 --> 00:59:38,902
we all stay in touch uh create a little discord server so we can all keep talking and hanging out

1181
00:59:38,902 --> 00:59:41,562
Cause we're not making Facebook groups.

1182
00:59:41,702 --> 00:59:42,162
That's stupid.

1183
00:59:42,423 --> 00:59:42,502
Right.

1184
00:59:43,122 --> 00:59:43,522
Um,

1185
00:59:43,683 --> 00:59:44,022
obviously.

1186
00:59:44,242 --> 00:59:44,423
Yeah.

1187
00:59:44,423 --> 00:59:48,382
So then we're all keeping in touch and then I'm going to orchestrate

1188
00:59:48,382 --> 00:59:49,722
something else.

1189
00:59:49,822 --> 00:59:50,222
Like,

1190
00:59:50,522 --> 00:59:51,582
like a few weeks later,

1191
00:59:51,582 --> 00:59:55,782
I'm going to be at the scene of a fire.

1192
00:59:55,842 --> 00:59:56,122
Basically.

1193
00:59:56,122 --> 00:59:58,183
I'm going to rescue a whole bunch of people out of a fire.

1194
00:59:58,482 --> 01:00:01,522
What people don't know is I basically orchestrated the fire.

1195
01:00:01,622 --> 01:00:02,702
So I knew it,

1196
01:00:02,923 --> 01:00:05,062
but I'm going to say this like same thing.

1197
01:00:05,062 --> 01:00:05,362
So I'm,

1198
01:00:05,462 --> 01:00:06,362
it's making national news.

1199
01:00:06,362 --> 01:00:07,382
Cause like I saved a,

1200
01:00:07,382 --> 01:00:09,942
like a whole family of people and family.

1201
01:00:10,042 --> 01:00:12,842
I'm sorry that I couldn't let you be in on this plan.

1202
01:00:13,662 --> 01:00:14,102
Um,

1203
01:00:14,102 --> 01:00:14,522
but I,

1204
01:00:14,642 --> 01:00:16,442
I needed the fear in your eyes to be real.

1205
01:00:16,902 --> 01:00:18,282
So sorry about that.

1206
01:00:19,322 --> 01:00:22,423
So you put them in a home with scared secure.

1207
01:00:23,002 --> 01:00:23,442
Yeah.

1208
01:00:24,082 --> 01:00:26,022
And I took them off the white list.

1209
01:00:27,082 --> 01:00:27,522
So,

1210
01:00:27,662 --> 01:00:28,062
uh,

1211
01:00:28,242 --> 01:00:28,602
anyway,

1212
01:00:28,782 --> 01:00:29,182
then,

1213
01:00:29,182 --> 01:00:30,822
so this is national.

1214
01:00:30,923 --> 01:00:31,762
And then I'm going to say,

1215
01:00:31,902 --> 01:00:32,622
I was like,

1216
01:00:32,683 --> 01:00:35,943
I would say it was just right place,

1217
01:00:36,022 --> 01:00:36,762
right time thing.

1218
01:00:36,762 --> 01:00:40,802
But I, I saw a vision of this house and I knew I needed to be here at this time.

1219
01:00:41,242 --> 01:00:51,772
I didn know why But and then and then the people on the cruise there was enough of them and they scattered around the country enough that they going to be like I know I know her

1220
01:00:51,852 --> 01:00:57,032
I know this person, like, this is not the first time she's had a premonition and she's saved

1221
01:00:57,032 --> 01:01:04,972
people. Right. Um, and so then suddenly like words going to spread and like into these little

1222
01:01:04,972 --> 01:01:14,532
pockets. And then, um, then I'm going to, I'm going to do this one other time. Um, what am I?

1223
01:01:14,752 --> 01:01:26,412
I'll, I'll, the, a laser tag is going to collapse and I'm going to, I'm going to save all, it's

1224
01:01:26,412 --> 01:01:30,292
going to be a, I'm going to make sure it happens when there's a bunch of families there for

1225
01:01:30,292 --> 01:01:37,912
birthdays. So it'd be like a Saturday afternoon, something like that. And, um, and, but I will have

1226
01:01:37,912 --> 01:01:43,212
gone in to the laser tag and been like, gone to one of the laser tag marshals and been like,

1227
01:01:43,432 --> 01:01:46,772
you got to keep everyone out of squadron a just trust me. And you're going to be like,

1228
01:01:46,772 --> 01:01:50,592
and he's gonna be like, okay, whatever lady get out. You're, you don't even have a pack on.

1229
01:01:50,752 --> 01:01:54,852
And I'm going to grab him by his vest. I'm going to go, God damn it. You listen to me. You get

1230
01:01:54,852 --> 01:01:59,012
everybody out of quadrant a. And then he's like, fine, fine. There's a crazy lady yelling at me.

1231
01:01:59,012 --> 01:02:01,272
And so he's just like, everybody out of quadrant A.

1232
01:02:01,432 --> 01:02:05,392
And then, and then like three minutes later, quadrant A is going to collapse.

1233
01:02:05,652 --> 01:02:08,672
And he's going to be like, what the hell just happened?

1234
01:02:09,372 --> 01:02:16,732
And not knowing that I, you know, organized the structural decline of quadrant A.

1235
01:02:18,012 --> 01:02:23,792
And then now this is like three different times I've saved people's lives.

1236
01:02:23,792 --> 01:02:53,772
Yeah. So then I'm going to just in my discord group, be like, this is crazy. You guys, I have this vision of the world's ending. And I hate this. I hate that. But it's like, I've had visions now and I can't keep it. Like, I can't keep thinking this is just happening just one time. And then like, they're going to be like, but I, we need to be, we need to tell people we need to like get people on our side.

1237
01:02:53,792 --> 01:02:56,632
And then, so then they'll start rallying people they know.

1238
01:02:56,672 --> 01:02:59,652
And they're going to be like, no, this is like a real deal person.

1239
01:02:59,652 --> 01:03:04,552
Like, trust me, we conga lined together like this.

1240
01:03:04,612 --> 01:03:05,672
She's not a weirdo.

1241
01:03:06,752 --> 01:03:08,292
And like, this is real.

1242
01:03:08,292 --> 01:03:11,992
And then I now will have a base of saving people's lives.

1243
01:03:11,992 --> 01:03:22,472
And then I think I can, I'll buy a, I'll buy a farm, a big commune where everyone can come live.

1244
01:03:23,792 --> 01:03:27,132
And if people want to give me all their money, that's fine.

1245
01:03:28,612 --> 01:03:29,572
That's generous of you.

1246
01:03:29,572 --> 01:03:34,072
I'm not going to be one of those cult leaders that demands everything like that.

1247
01:03:35,652 --> 01:03:40,392
Also, I'm not going to be one of those cult leaders that makes everyone have sex with me.

1248
01:03:41,192 --> 01:03:42,372
Who wants to have sex with everyone?

1249
01:03:42,452 --> 01:03:43,172
That sounds terrible.

1250
01:03:43,472 --> 01:03:44,352
Yeah, terrible.

1251
01:03:47,352 --> 01:03:47,752
Yeah.

1252
01:03:48,632 --> 01:03:50,092
So then I think that's what I do.

1253
01:03:50,152 --> 01:03:52,452
I establish a pattern of me saving people's lives.

1254
01:03:53,792 --> 01:03:58,712
And your whole, this is all in service of having people live with you on a farm?

1255
01:03:59,312 --> 01:04:02,772
Well, living with me on a farm, I'll still actually probably have my own place.

1256
01:04:02,852 --> 01:04:03,632
I'm going to create a farm.

1257
01:04:03,712 --> 01:04:05,132
I'm going to like herd them into one place.

1258
01:04:05,812 --> 01:04:09,332
Just kind of keep them focused, eyes on the prize kind of thing.

1259
01:04:10,092 --> 01:04:13,852
But I don't want to necessarily, like I'll have my own place.

1260
01:04:13,912 --> 01:04:15,572
I don't want to be living with these people.

1261
01:04:15,892 --> 01:04:16,112
Amen.

1262
01:04:16,372 --> 01:04:16,592
Yeah.

1263
01:04:16,712 --> 01:04:17,272
Amen, sister.

1264
01:04:17,612 --> 01:04:17,992
Thank you.

1265
01:04:18,472 --> 01:04:21,632
Well, anyway, was there a different component to your question?

1266
01:04:21,632 --> 01:04:22,692
That answers it.

1267
01:04:22,692 --> 01:04:24,732
that's how I'd trick people into listening to me.

1268
01:04:25,052 --> 01:04:25,152
Yeah.

1269
01:04:25,192 --> 01:04:27,852
Basically the idea was how would you get people to believe you were truly a

1270
01:04:27,852 --> 01:04:28,092
prophet?

1271
01:04:28,212 --> 01:04:29,352
And then what would you do with the information?

1272
01:04:30,072 --> 01:04:30,192
Yeah.

1273
01:04:30,192 --> 01:04:30,672
Like how would you,

1274
01:04:30,812 --> 01:04:31,112
how do you,

1275
01:04:31,172 --> 01:04:32,632
how do you groom people basically?

1276
01:04:33,012 --> 01:04:33,232
Yeah.

1277
01:04:33,992 --> 01:04:35,352
And just give a great grooming guide.

1278
01:04:35,912 --> 01:04:36,212
Yeah.

1279
01:04:36,292 --> 01:04:36,652
And then,

1280
01:04:37,172 --> 01:04:38,972
then I would use,

1281
01:04:39,072 --> 01:04:39,252
yeah.

1282
01:04:40,052 --> 01:04:40,892
And then I'd just be,

1283
01:04:40,972 --> 01:04:42,972
I'd use my power and fame to just,

1284
01:04:42,972 --> 01:04:44,792
I'd keep it low key,

1285
01:04:44,892 --> 01:04:45,332
but I,

1286
01:04:45,452 --> 01:04:45,692
you know,

1287
01:04:46,032 --> 01:04:50,552
would go on talk shows and stuff and I get into fancy events.

1288
01:04:50,552 --> 01:04:55,872
you'd have a social media girl like taking clips and everything yeah and it would be because there's

1289
01:04:55,872 --> 01:05:00,312
no sex and money involved it would be like no we're not a cult you either believe me or you

1290
01:05:00,312 --> 01:05:05,252
don't it's not whatever i don't give a shit what do i get out of this yeah like no i believe

1291
01:05:05,252 --> 01:05:11,952
believe me because it's the truth if you don't great live your life you're gonna die soon anyway

1292
01:05:11,952 --> 01:05:19,192
because the world's coming to an end because i saw it yeah because i saw it um yeah oh and then

1293
01:05:19,192 --> 01:05:21,212
And then that way people won't be as suspect.

1294
01:05:21,212 --> 01:05:26,372
So I can kind of like live and have some like fame and notoriety and be,

1295
01:05:26,772 --> 01:05:27,412
you know,

1296
01:05:27,432 --> 01:05:30,092
walk into a fancy restaurant and they'll have a table ready for me,

1297
01:05:30,092 --> 01:05:31,332
even if it's packed,

1298
01:05:31,432 --> 01:05:32,492
that kind of a thing.

1299
01:05:32,552 --> 01:05:33,372
That's what I'll get out of it.

1300
01:05:33,512 --> 01:05:34,392
That's great.

1301
01:05:34,452 --> 01:05:34,812
It's great.

1302
01:05:34,932 --> 01:05:35,132
Yeah.

1303
01:05:36,272 --> 01:05:36,992
Better than mine.

1304
01:05:37,512 --> 01:05:38,432
I want to hear yours.

1305
01:05:38,812 --> 01:05:39,112
Well,

1306
01:05:39,152 --> 01:05:42,432
I just feel like I should focus on defrauding one person.

1307
01:05:43,032 --> 01:05:43,572
So like,

1308
01:05:43,572 --> 01:05:44,472
you know how people have like,

1309
01:05:44,612 --> 01:05:46,212
like spiritual advisors,

1310
01:05:46,812 --> 01:05:48,192
like they'll hire someone and it's like,

1311
01:05:48,192 --> 01:05:54,092
this is my muse or my advisor or whatever, I could basically find someone who I already

1312
01:05:54,092 --> 01:06:00,332
believe to be gullible, you know, like I case the right person and then I orchestrate.

1313
01:06:00,712 --> 01:06:01,572
Oh fuck.

1314
01:06:01,832 --> 01:06:02,072
Sorry.

1315
01:06:02,852 --> 01:06:04,312
It's really, you said that word a bunch.

1316
01:06:05,932 --> 01:06:14,652
I, I, I set up a meeting between us somehow, not necessarily a meeting, but like a meeting

1317
01:06:14,652 --> 01:06:15,232
or whatever.

1318
01:06:15,232 --> 01:06:18,352
and I already know all this information about them

1319
01:06:18,352 --> 01:06:19,612
and so I could basically

1320
01:06:19,612 --> 01:06:22,372
I'd bump into them and when our skin

1321
01:06:22,372 --> 01:06:23,332
touches I could

1322
01:06:23,332 --> 01:06:26,172
do like a weird

1323
01:06:26,172 --> 01:06:27,172
like

1324
01:06:27,172 --> 01:06:30,192
glazed look

1325
01:06:30,192 --> 01:06:32,532
and then like say something that I know

1326
01:06:32,532 --> 01:06:33,832
is about their life

1327
01:06:33,832 --> 01:06:36,332
and then something I know is going to happen

1328
01:06:36,332 --> 01:06:37,672
because I made it happen

1329
01:06:37,672 --> 01:06:40,552
like they get a certain piece of thing in the mail

1330
01:06:40,552 --> 01:06:42,492
or something

1331
01:06:42,492 --> 01:06:43,052
you know what I mean

1332
01:06:43,052 --> 01:06:44,952
so they're like oh my god

1333
01:06:44,952 --> 01:06:50,952
thinking like how did that was audit they said that thing that is so intimately related to my

1334
01:06:50,952 --> 01:06:58,612
life and then they other thing happens and then i make sure i'm around them again soon and they

1335
01:06:58,612 --> 01:07:05,772
see me and i'll probably wear a big hat so there's no confusion like that's the guy you know

1336
01:07:05,772 --> 01:07:11,832
like a 10 gallon hat yeah and they're like they come they approach me because they're like

1337
01:07:11,832 --> 01:07:17,612
who are you because like whatever you know i mean so like i said like thing and what did i get out

1338
01:07:17,612 --> 01:07:24,132
of it i just had a weird moment yeah and then so they they want it already because that's the kind

1339
01:07:24,132 --> 01:07:31,412
of person that's the person i sought out yeah so they they they make something happen with me like

1340
01:07:31,412 --> 01:07:39,792
they want to keep me around suddenly we're friends um and i just start you know bread crumbing with

1341
01:07:39,792 --> 01:07:45,672
stuff I know and then setting up events that happen the way I want them to, but that I'm

1342
01:07:45,672 --> 01:07:49,972
not otherwise connected to, cause I'm going to have to research all of their people, you

1343
01:07:49,972 --> 01:07:50,092
know?

1344
01:07:50,932 --> 01:08:00,992
Um, and so I just, I do that until they truly believe 100% I'm a prophet.

1345
01:08:00,992 --> 01:08:05,752
and then they trust me

1346
01:08:05,752 --> 01:08:08,572
and I tell them,

1347
01:08:08,812 --> 01:08:11,972
oh, I had this vision that you went to XYZ place

1348
01:08:11,972 --> 01:08:15,612
and an incredible opportunity happened for you.

1349
01:08:16,732 --> 01:08:18,932
And they go,

1350
01:08:19,092 --> 01:08:20,672
but they let me stay in their house

1351
01:08:20,672 --> 01:08:22,372
because they trust me.

1352
01:08:22,372 --> 01:08:23,772
And while they're gone,

1353
01:08:24,752 --> 01:08:27,372
I lood at all.

1354
01:08:30,992 --> 01:08:39,072
just i just take everything silver gone and they're not jewelry down to the tablecloths gone

1355
01:08:39,072 --> 01:08:46,532
but aren't they gonna just come home and be like he robbed me yeah and you're okay with that

1356
01:08:46,532 --> 01:08:53,612
what i've gone i got all their stuff but you is it someone that has some good stuff yeah okay yeah

1357
01:08:53,612 --> 01:08:56,272
what do you think I'm

1358
01:08:56,272 --> 01:08:58,892
just like a single mom of three

1359
01:08:58,892 --> 01:09:00,292
I'm like

1360
01:09:00,292 --> 01:09:02,512
I'm like

1361
01:09:02,512 --> 01:09:03,992
just like scraping by and I'm like

1362
01:09:03,992 --> 01:09:05,132
go to Geneva

1363
01:09:05,132 --> 01:09:08,472
your life will get better in Geneva

1364
01:09:08,472 --> 01:09:14,632
so you've pre-vetted them

1365
01:09:14,632 --> 01:09:15,692
they have good shit

1366
01:09:15,692 --> 01:09:16,092
yeah

1367
01:09:16,092 --> 01:09:19,292
but then the cops aren't

1368
01:09:19,292 --> 01:09:20,792
they don't know who I am

1369
01:09:20,792 --> 01:09:21,612
I used a fake identity

1370
01:09:21,612 --> 01:09:22,272
it was an alias

1371
01:09:22,272 --> 01:09:25,832
But they have a picture

1372
01:09:25,832 --> 01:09:26,612
Let's have a picture

1373
01:09:26,661 --> 01:09:31,221
silicone face they don't know who i am okay

1374
01:09:31,221 --> 01:09:40,841
you're wearing knot pulls yeah one over each eye i could pick those nipples out of a lineup

1375
01:09:40,841 --> 01:09:46,641
yeah those nips out of a lineup what do you what do you think

1376
01:09:46,641 --> 01:09:54,401
great thank you you went narrow with it yeah because i don't want well you're not getting

1377
01:09:54,401 --> 01:09:59,601
really anything out of yours. Well, once I become like famous, then you get the doors that open

1378
01:09:59,601 --> 01:10:05,321
and the money comes with after that. And then you get the doors that open. You're investing in

1379
01:10:05,321 --> 01:10:11,601
yourself. Yeah, exactly. Like I'm investing in a certain lifestyle. Like I want to have, you know,

1380
01:10:12,101 --> 01:10:16,981
and I'm just getting a bunch of stuff. You're investing in stuff. You're getting that single

1381
01:10:16,981 --> 01:10:18,181
mom's Ikea furniture.

1382
01:10:22,021 --> 01:10:23,461
Pirates, pirates, pirates.

1383
01:10:25,021 --> 01:10:25,821
All right.

1384
01:10:26,321 --> 01:10:27,741
Well, good for us.

1385
01:10:28,161 --> 01:10:30,741
We have answered the big question.

1386
01:10:31,081 --> 01:10:31,721
The big question.

1387
01:10:32,681 --> 01:10:33,101
All right.

1388
01:10:33,521 --> 01:11:01,156
I going to go first because I don think I have anything for you I really First in what Oh guessing secret words Man one year later and I terrible You a shitty conductor I was trained Okay Cause I I for the longest

1389
01:11:01,156 --> 01:11:06,336
time only had two words written down and i don't think either one of them is it um

1390
01:11:06,336 --> 01:11:22,376
is your word hummingbird no or hummingbirds no throat box no profit no defrauding no defraud

1391
01:11:22,376 --> 01:11:39,316
no okay that pause oh sorry gullible no bread crumbing no loot no silicon no that's all i got

1392
01:11:39,316 --> 01:11:46,316
oh you must have said it during the invention of the week and i just didn't clock it uh i saw you

1393
01:11:46,316 --> 01:11:48,296
writing down something at the end there and I got a little

1394
01:11:48,296 --> 01:11:49,476
weird. No. Yeah.

1395
01:11:51,476 --> 01:11:59,511
All right Are you done I done My word was iguanas

1396
01:12:00,871 --> 01:12:03,011
Oh, no. Did I say it?

1397
01:12:03,011 --> 01:12:03,811
No, you said iguana.

1398
01:12:04,431 --> 01:12:04,771
Dang.

1399
01:12:04,791 --> 01:12:07,051
And you said iguana twice, and I didn't want to push it, so I let it alone.

1400
01:12:07,451 --> 01:12:10,231
I just needed to get the word, you know?

1401
01:12:10,331 --> 01:12:10,571
Yeah.

1402
01:12:10,891 --> 01:12:12,671
And my decoy word was tablecloths.

1403
01:12:14,271 --> 01:12:17,131
Tablecloths. Right down to the tablecloths.

1404
01:12:17,131 --> 01:12:22,431
how come the plural tablecloth isn't tableclothes

1405
01:12:22,431 --> 01:12:28,771
I mean just looking at it here on my index card I want to say tableclothes

1406
01:12:28,771 --> 01:12:31,211
it is an ES at the end it's not an S

1407
01:12:31,211 --> 01:12:32,691
yeah it's an ES

1408
01:12:32,691 --> 01:12:39,431
well although that's what my UK improv suggestion generator app said

1409
01:12:39,431 --> 01:12:42,131
so it probably is no E in America

1410
01:12:42,131 --> 01:12:44,731
though we use a British accent briefly on this episode

1411
01:12:44,731 --> 01:12:46,471
we are from the United States

1412
01:12:46,471 --> 01:12:48,371
This is fucking America.

1413
01:12:48,891 --> 01:12:50,451
And we spell things right here.

1414
01:12:51,051 --> 01:12:52,651
Get that OU out of here.

1415
01:12:54,151 --> 01:12:54,971
All right.

1416
01:12:55,031 --> 01:12:55,831
Well, dang.

1417
01:12:56,391 --> 01:12:56,711
It's okay.

1418
01:12:57,651 --> 01:12:58,231
My turn.

1419
01:12:59,511 --> 01:13:00,531
I'm worried.

1420
01:13:01,911 --> 01:13:03,451
Is your word criminalistics?

1421
01:13:04,571 --> 01:13:16,845
That my word Yes Yes Oh I tried to repeat it so that maybe you would think it wasn my word i didn know how else to

1422
01:13:16,845 --> 01:13:21,225
do that word there was no way i was gonna that was there was no way i was gonna say that without

1423
01:13:21,225 --> 01:13:29,305
it yeah that is a toughie oh no so i guess you can guess all the rest of them as decoys now

1424
01:13:29,305 --> 01:13:37,505
okay these are all decoy guesses quarantine no quadrant no orchestrated no bewitched yes

1425
01:13:37,505 --> 01:13:46,425
thank you baby oh wow yay three points for francis you are now in the lead oh my god

1426
01:13:46,425 --> 01:13:50,385
it went from me being one and a half points in the lead to you now you're being one and a half

1427
01:13:50,385 --> 01:13:55,365
points in the lead you're one and a half points in the lead thank you like to thank god and god's

1428
01:13:55,365 --> 01:14:05,365
wife. Well, what a, what a triumphant way to start year two for you. Thank you. And I look forward to

1429
01:14:05,365 --> 01:14:11,385
being neck and neck with you for the next year. Yeah, me too. Thanks for listening.