welcome to very fine friends bonus improv
joe can we get a suggestion for our improv
first i would like to point out you definitely said bonus improv like that before i don't think
that's like your go-to i think you need to change the about section on the website no
yeah listeners if you go to verified friends.com and go to the about section
it's got a little bit of info on all of us and it's and mine says i've never said bonus improv
the same way twice.
And I think that was a pretty new way to say it.
You can move on to...
I was at insects.
You could move on to accents next time.
Then it will always be new.
Anyways, your suggestion is adventurous.
I know the answer to this question,
but I'll ask it for the audience.
When you got to eat,
do you typically get the same thing
from places that you go to?
Yes.
Whenever I try to branch out, if it's disappointing, then I'm like, oh.
I could have had something I knew was good.
There are certain restaurants where I've tried basically everything on the menu
because they have a good track record.
And I also go often enough that I can gamble with one meal.
Hillstone being a good example.
Hillstone's a good example.
The Parlor is the other good example.
um yeah but and and you are medium adventurous it's a great way to explain me i was gonna say
you were like semi-adventurous yeah definitely it's like i typically stay around what i know
but i have my eye on other things and occasionally i'll try them but then i'll come back what's the
most um like the most adventurous thing you've eaten or tried caviar maybe really that it um
that feels like the most exotic thing but i wouldn't call it adventurous well no because i
mean it's pretty common and fine dining and stuff it's not my example would be uh escargot
oh i've tried that yeah i think i've tried that once too it's i hated it it was disgusting i'm a
very like it's like chewy it's it's like i'm a very textural eater so if the texture of it is
gross i can't handle it and then also just thinking on top of that that these are snails
is not yeah particularly palatable so i know my my dad likes escargot quite a bit i think he just likes the garlic butter i would say for me probably alligator i was gonna say that too but like pop like i get it
a papado papado yeah but it's just like breaded i know it doesn't seem adventurous it doesn't it
feels like cheating to say that that was an adventurous thing that i tried because it was
like it was just like deep fried breaded uh but yes also yeah papadoes and it was one of those
things like in college when uh like a friend's dad came to town so he like took like a group of
college like it's like oh like all right get your friends together i'll take you all to dinner like
oh mr johnson's so cool yeah and so it was like a weird awkward dinner with somebody's dad
but well i mean awkward because it's like it'd be fine if it was just us there because keep them
to talk to me. I'm just trying to eat this alligator.
I know. And there's this middle-aged man
who insists I'm paying for my meal.
Oh, I've got it. I think that would
fall under exotic too.
The alligator?
Yes, but not as common. Caviar
is really common. You're right. It is super
common. Anyway, I think
ostrich egg.
Ooh.
You've had that? Yeah, one time my dad brought one home
and it was humongous.
Yeah. And he's like, we're going to eat it
for breakfast. And like
he like made scrambled eggs with it.
Not good.
It's all conditioning because you like what you are used to,
but not a clear taste difference from chicken egg.
Oh, that's weird.
And I feel the same way about quail eggs.
Sometimes people put quail eggs in the thing.
I'm like, no, I don't like it.
Hmm.
A lot of yolk.
Yeah.
That's, I, I, I'm not like,
I'm preconditioned to be, to like, not,
if I think something's going to be gross
I'm like I can't handle it very well
like when they do like they don't really do it
on Survivor anymore but they used to like old
like back in the day they would have challenges where they'd
give them like gross stuff to eat and it was like who could
finish it first it'd be like I 100%
I know I would just be like no I'm
I'm failing at this I'm not going to do it
like I will throw up for sure
my like my TV in my bedroom
which I use for like watching sitcoms
before I fall asleep like it
defaults to like cable television
and the channel that it always goes to is Fear Factor.
The old ones?
The old Fear Factors, like old Joe Rogan Fear Factors.
And the one that was on last night was like this guy had to eat,
like it was a bowl of scorpion and tarantulas
that had basically been mashed up.
So it was just like gross, like pus goo,
but also too they left like tentacles and like legs in there.
It was disgusting.
Yeah.
And he ate all of them.
I can't do it.
It's making me sick right now.
There's a reason the parlor doesn't have mashed up scorpions on the menu.
Yeah.
And now, improv.
Honey?
Yeah?
We're at our favorite restaurant.
I love it here I love it here I love it here But I always always get the same thing I know That what I love about you You very dependable Happy anniversary by the way Thank you
Thank you so much.
Happy anniversary to you, too.
Oh, you didn't have to say that.
Seven years.
We did it.
It's the magic number.
I know.
Seven.
I think I'm going to go a little crazy.
What?
I'm sorry.
Maybe it's the seven-year itch.
Itch?
Yeah.
You ever heard that phrase?
Yes, I have.
seven year itch.
Seven year itch.
Usually doesn't apply to relationships.
It implies you want to get out of them,
but that's not what you mean.
No, no, no.
I just, no, no.
I'm just.
Seven year adventurous itch.
Yes.
Yeah, exactly.
I think I'm going to try something different.
Now, you know how we,
like most restaurants will have like a lobster tank
that you can choose from.
Yeah.
This restaurant has a gigantic box with a big question mark on it.
And I've always wondered what it would be like if we just ordered whatever.
I know.
And they don't let you watch other people choose from it.
Yeah.
So we never know.
And then you never see those people.
Wow.
You're going to pick from the mystery box?
I'm going to order the mystery box.
Okay.
I'm not ready.
Oh, no, I understand.
I'm going to stick with my chicken piccata.
I totally get it.
Okay.
And you know how I am.
So I am not going to be sharing this.
No, no, I know.
Okay.
I know who I married seven years ago.
I love you, Beth.
Do you remember our vows?
Yeah, I do.
And you said in sickness and health, but not in sharing food.
And everyone laughed.
Everyone laughed.
But I was serious.
It was a fun moment.
But you were serious.
I knew.
I knew you were serious.
Okay.
Well, let's do this.
Yeah.
Have we all decided what we're going to get?
Yeah.
I'd like to start with the gentleman.
Thank you.
I'll have the usual.
Piccata for you.
So cute.
So sweet.
Okay.
Let me just write that down.
Put a heart over the eye.
And for you.
Well, I want to.
I know you probably think I'm going to get my usual.
Yes.
Steakums.
Mm-hmm.
But.
What?
I already wrote it down.
No, cross it off.
You're not getting your steakums?
I'm not getting steakums.
Not today.
Oh, my God.
The itch has come for me.
Oh, she's itchy.
I'm real itchy.
Oh, wow.
What are you going to get?
I'd like to get the mystery box.
The what?
Oh, she's the mystery.
Oh, honey, honey, she fainted.
Do something.
I'm okay.
I'm back.
I'm okay.
I'm in orthopedics.
Oh, good.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I just, you, you shocked me.
Yeah.
The mystery box?
You sure?
I positive I positive I ready for the mystery box Let me just drape this curtain around y table I be right back with the box
Okay.
Honey, are you sure about this? This is... I mean, she fainted. She never faints.
We call her the Never Faint Waitress.
I know. I can't believe I broke her. She's gonna have to get a new nickname.
This is... I mean, you don't have to do this.
Our marriage is exciting enough. You don't have to...
Honey?
Oh, wait.
She's beckoning me over to the giant box.
I have to go.
I think this is where I leave you.
Okay.
If my food gets here, can I start?
Yeah, don't wait for me.
I don't remember.
I remember that in your vows, too.
I eat my food immediately upon receiving it.
And everyone laughed.
Everyone laughed.
Yeah.
All right.
Okay, well.
When I come back from the mystery box, I think I'll be a different person.
Okay.
Love you.
Love you too, honey.
See you on the other side.
You don't have to say that.
Okay.
Um, sorry.
Um, I'm ready for you.
Are you, are you sure you want to do this?
Yes.
Okay.
And you just...
Waitress who only fainted once.
Oh, that has a ring.
It has a ring.
It's a new one.
I like it.
Yeah, I like it too.
It shows you can evolve too.
I can evolve.
Speaking of evolution, I need you to sign these NDAs and waivers.
Okay.
All right.
Can't sue.
Okay.
Anything bad happens, that's on you.
We like our stuff to rhyme.
This is one of the reasons I love this restaurant.
Oh, you missed an initial.
Even if you turn blue.
I normally get the Steakums Steakums, but not today.
Mystery box, here I come.
All right.
It's just us.
Now, I now put the curtain around your table.
If you want to bring this food back to your table, this mystery box food,
you're going to have to, you know, hide it.
Right, no, I can't let it.
It's a big secret.
I just, I'm glad I get to, but the box has a door on it.
I get to walk inside the box.
Open the door and then I will.
Leave me to it?
Yes, but I'll probably also still be there so that I can explain what.
you're seeing.
Alright, I'm going in.
Me too.
Okay.
Here we are in a dark room. Pull that string.
A light will come on.
Now the light is on.
Look at that table. Do you see it?
Oh my god.
Come closer.
Wow.
Look.
I'm looking.
Thank god you're here because I don't know what this is.
It's chicken piccata.
scene