1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:18,700
good nostrils francis i've been practicing i've been working them out i got tiny little

2
00:00:18,700 --> 00:00:20,020
nostril barbells.

3
00:00:21,580 --> 00:00:22,380
200.

4
00:00:24,140 --> 00:00:25,100
How fat

5
00:00:25,100 --> 00:00:25,820
is she?

6
00:00:27,580 --> 00:00:28,460
Welcome

7
00:00:28,460 --> 00:00:31,200
to Very Fine France.

8
00:00:31,860 --> 00:00:32,620
Very Fine France?

9
00:00:32,980 --> 00:00:35,080
Very Fine France, sis.

10
00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:36,620
Thank you.

11
00:00:37,900 --> 00:00:38,740
Bonus.

12
00:00:39,260 --> 00:00:40,180
Improv.

13
00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:41,120
Joe.

14
00:00:42,020 --> 00:00:44,700
What is the word for us?

15
00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:46,480
Obligation.

16
00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:48,600
Obligation.

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00:00:48,700 --> 00:00:49,700
Is that what you think of us?

18
00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:50,520
Yeah.

19
00:00:50,820 --> 00:00:52,860
He didn't even have to look that up.

20
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:54,080
That was just for his own brain.

21
00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:54,640
Yep.

22
00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:58,540
That was from the speech part of his uneaten brain.

23
00:00:58,900 --> 00:00:59,300
Hmm.

24
00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:02,920
Do you have obligations in life?

25
00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:04,920
Sure.

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00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:07,260
Most do.

27
00:01:07,380 --> 00:01:07,960
Well, yeah.

28
00:01:08,380 --> 00:01:11,040
Well, obligation is something you have to do that you don't really want to do.

29
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Do you want to strike me as someone who does things she doesn't want to do?

30
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Thank you.

31
00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:17,440
I think.

32
00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:20,260
not that I'm not capable of it but luckily

33
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like I've my life

34
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is at such a point that I'm doing the things I want

35
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to be doing so that's wonderful

36
00:01:26,300 --> 00:01:28,280
you deserve it thank you I'm not sure that

37
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I do but I'm glad that I have it regardless

38
00:01:30,540 --> 00:01:32,560
that's

39
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,480
beautiful should put that on a pillow

40
00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:35,900
and sell it

41
00:01:35,900 --> 00:01:38,960
what about you

42
00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:40,740
I know you've got many

43
00:01:40,740 --> 00:01:42,780
we can't even get into it

44
00:01:42,780 --> 00:01:44,900
it's a real shit show

45
00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:46,640
it's a real sack of farts

46
00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:48,040
yeah

47
00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:49,420
that's okay

48
00:01:49,420 --> 00:01:50,980
I guess

49
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it's one of those

50
00:01:51,700 --> 00:01:52,840
okay sacks of farts

51
00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:53,380
you know

52
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my whole life

53
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:54,700
is just

54
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do this

55
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do that

56
00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:56,920
yeah

57
00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:58,780
but one day

58
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it'll be over

59
00:02:02,440 --> 00:02:05,340
is this one of those

60
00:02:05,340 --> 00:02:06,160
it's concerning

61
00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:09,180
nah don't worry about it

62
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I'm fine

63
00:02:09,660 --> 00:02:10,220
okay

64
00:02:10,220 --> 00:02:11,560
more nice pants

65
00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:13,920
yeah they are nice pants

66
00:02:13,920 --> 00:02:14,600
thanks

67
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:15,680
and they fit

68
00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:21,520
you know that's a real good quality sometimes the way things like the day is dictated it's like

69
00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:26,780
i have to wear like a certain outfit for like a certain event and how the clothes fit on first

70
00:02:26,780 --> 00:02:33,200
attempt really dictates how the day goes yeah yeah i know that could be a kind of a

71
00:02:34,420 --> 00:02:38,340
game changer especially if like you have something pictured in your head

72
00:02:38,340 --> 00:02:51,080
and you and then like you look at yourself in the mirror and you like oh this is not looking the way it looked in my head like when you do that like like in clueless the dressing the when she has like her closet where

73
00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:56,120
it dresses her or whatever oh yeah um it's like in my head i have one of those for myself

74
00:02:56,120 --> 00:03:01,420
and it's but like when it doesn't look and it almost never looks the way that i think it's

75
00:03:01,420 --> 00:03:08,100
gonna look in my head like who put a funhouse mirror in my room what what uh what shape is that

76
00:03:08,100 --> 00:03:17,180
scientists haven't discovered it yet but i have yep yeah well well uh well then today must have

77
00:03:17,180 --> 00:03:26,160
been off the right foot because you look good thanks yeah i feel good good i'm glad i'm glad

78
00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:35,500
i thought you were jenna hey no i'm juby juby and now improv

79
00:03:38,100 --> 00:03:42,880
All right, Kate, get your backpack.

80
00:03:43,940 --> 00:03:45,320
It's your first day of high school.

81
00:03:45,660 --> 00:03:46,020
All right.

82
00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:47,660
I love you, so I'll take you.

83
00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:48,420
I guess I'll take you.

84
00:03:48,940 --> 00:03:50,220
I guess I'll take you.

85
00:03:50,900 --> 00:03:54,140
I could take the bus if this is going to be a problem for you.

86
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:54,960
No, no, no.

87
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:59,480
Then everyone sees that Kate's mom made her take the bus.

88
00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:00,300
Mom.

89
00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:03,120
Okay, well, thank you.

90
00:04:04,020 --> 00:04:05,100
Thank you for the ride.

91
00:04:05,660 --> 00:04:05,980
Yeah.

92
00:04:07,060 --> 00:04:07,680
It's okay.

93
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,000
I'll just do my work later.

94
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:11,400
Thank you.

95
00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:11,700
Mom?

96
00:04:11,980 --> 00:04:12,200
Huh?

97
00:04:12,700 --> 00:04:13,160
Love you.

98
00:04:13,700 --> 00:04:14,120
Do you?

99
00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:16,160
Of course.

100
00:04:16,620 --> 00:04:17,180
That's your...

101
00:04:17,180 --> 00:04:18,240
You're sun and my stars.

102
00:04:18,980 --> 00:04:19,580
Am I?

103
00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:20,680
Every time...

104
00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:24,680
Every time something comes up that involves me, it's...

105
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:25,680
There's a lot of...

106
00:04:26,260 --> 00:04:27,880
Involved.

107
00:04:28,020 --> 00:04:28,900
You don't understand.

108
00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:33,520
When I was your age, I had to walk 1,400 miles in the snow.

109
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:34,360
Okay, Mom.

110
00:04:34,380 --> 00:04:35,260
One way.

111
00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:36,800
Mom, all right.

112
00:04:36,900 --> 00:04:38,220
I lost three toes.

113
00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:39,100
Okay.

114
00:04:40,100 --> 00:04:42,580
So you had 13 toes because you have 10 now.

115
00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:45,200
They grew back.

116
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:48,480
Okay, well.

117
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:49,660
Don't look at my feet.

118
00:04:49,820 --> 00:04:50,700
Anyway, are you ready to go?

119
00:04:51,540 --> 00:04:56,060
If you don't want me to look at your feet, why'd you put them up on the dashboard of the car?

120
00:04:56,420 --> 00:04:57,420
I'm a mystery.

121
00:04:57,940 --> 00:04:58,300
Okay.

122
00:04:58,300 --> 00:04:59,380
A lot going on.

123
00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:00,160
All right, Mom.

124
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:01,600
Well, can we just get to school?

125
00:05:01,820 --> 00:05:02,120
Yeah.

126
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:02,620
Nope.

127
00:05:02,820 --> 00:05:03,840
I got a surprise for you.

128
00:05:04,060 --> 00:05:04,460
Ooh.

129
00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:05,420
We're not going to school.

130
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:06,680
Ooh, fun.

131
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:08,160
Yeah, we're going somewhere else.

132
00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:10,080
The DMV.

133
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:11,480
What?

134
00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:12,820
I got stuff to do!

135
00:05:13,140 --> 00:05:14,800
Oh, no, Mom, I'm...

136
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:15,660
Oh, you're just...

137
00:05:15,660 --> 00:05:18,660
You're taking me on your chores?

138
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:20,300
They're not chores.

139
00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:23,420
Mom, this is my first day of high school.

140
00:05:23,620 --> 00:05:36,161
So you be a little late and you skip a few classes and I sure you going to tell everyone it because your mother was horrible to you mom fine promise me you won i not going to swear on my life

141
00:05:36,161 --> 00:05:41,461
say the whole thing say the whole sentence i don't trust you i swear on your life that i won't tell

142
00:05:41,461 --> 00:05:47,201
everyone that you're horrible i just can we just get this over with i need to be at school all right

143
00:05:47,201 --> 00:05:52,541
i'll skip the dmv oh thank you of course we just gotta stop by the doctor's office because

144
00:05:52,541 --> 00:06:03,161
one of my regrown toes keeps falling off mom that's not mom that's tape it's tape on your foot

145
00:06:03,161 --> 00:06:08,881
yeah tape that i paid for the money i earned i couldn't even buy a good tape because i had to buy

146
00:06:08,881 --> 00:06:15,921
you books all right but okay fine let's go to the doctor real quick no i'll just take you to school

147
00:06:15,921 --> 00:06:20,961
thank you oh my god thank you because it's like really important that i get there and like

148
00:06:20,961 --> 00:06:23,341
if I'm not sitting at the right

149
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,301
in the right desk at the

150
00:06:25,301 --> 00:06:27,461
in homeroom, like if I'm sitting at the

151
00:06:27,461 --> 00:06:29,401
front, like I need to be in the back with the cool

152
00:06:29,401 --> 00:06:29,741
kids.

153
00:06:30,801 --> 00:06:33,101
Otherwise my whole high school is ruined.

154
00:06:34,521 --> 00:06:35,061
Don't worry.

155
00:06:35,301 --> 00:06:37,341
I'm your mother and I'm not gonna

156
00:06:37,341 --> 00:06:39,441
let you miss out on that opportunity.

157
00:06:39,881 --> 00:06:41,061
Thank you, Mom. Thank you.

158
00:06:42,201 --> 00:06:43,521
Except Dairy Queen is

159
00:06:43,521 --> 00:06:45,381
running a special

160
00:06:45,381 --> 00:06:47,401
two dipped cones, the mother and

161
00:06:47,401 --> 00:06:48,981
daughter special. Oh.

162
00:06:49,301 --> 00:06:50,361
But you both have to be there.

163
00:06:50,841 --> 00:06:51,161
Okay.

164
00:06:51,301 --> 00:06:52,681
I mean, there's a Dairy Queen on the way to school.

165
00:06:52,841 --> 00:06:55,181
No, the one across town is the only one with a D.

166
00:06:55,421 --> 00:06:56,381
Oh, Mom.

167
00:06:56,501 --> 00:06:57,001
No, it's okay.

168
00:06:57,601 --> 00:06:58,701
This is, it's okay.

169
00:06:58,801 --> 00:06:59,781
I can still get you there on time.

170
00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:04,441
Can I just pay later for you to have an extra dip cone?

171
00:07:04,701 --> 00:07:06,001
Oh, yeah.

172
00:07:07,601 --> 00:07:08,421
Okay, fine.

173
00:07:08,741 --> 00:07:11,421
No, no, I want you to, I want you to be cool.

174
00:07:11,721 --> 00:07:13,001
Here, let's just go to school.

175
00:07:13,381 --> 00:07:14,361
Okay, thank you.

176
00:07:14,361 --> 00:07:15,001
Here we are.

177
00:07:15,201 --> 00:07:16,321
Get out, get out of the car.

178
00:07:16,521 --> 00:07:17,261
Oh, thank you, Mom.

179
00:07:17,261 --> 00:07:18,221
Take your stuff and get out.

180
00:07:18,401 --> 00:07:19,021
Okay, all right.

181
00:07:19,021 --> 00:07:20,001
Just take yourself and go.

182
00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:21,561
Mom, why are you...

183
00:07:21,561 --> 00:07:21,861
What?

184
00:07:22,361 --> 00:07:24,881
Why are you following me into school?

185
00:07:25,201 --> 00:07:25,721
Why are you...

186
00:07:25,721 --> 00:07:26,581
Mom, don't follow me.

187
00:07:26,741 --> 00:07:27,381
I'm not following you.

188
00:07:27,541 --> 00:07:27,941
Yeah, you are.

189
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:28,201
You're following me.

190
00:07:28,201 --> 00:07:28,861
I come here sometimes.

191
00:07:29,001 --> 00:07:29,321
Mom, what?

192
00:07:29,361 --> 00:07:30,021
Your toe fell off.

193
00:07:30,081 --> 00:07:30,321
Mom.

194
00:07:30,381 --> 00:07:30,861
Leave it.

195
00:07:30,961 --> 00:07:31,361
Let's go.

196
00:07:31,621 --> 00:07:32,941
Mom, don't follow me.

197
00:07:33,081 --> 00:07:33,701
No, it's okay.

198
00:07:34,081 --> 00:07:34,521
Mom, you're coming.

199
00:07:34,861 --> 00:07:35,521
Oh, here we are.

200
00:07:35,541 --> 00:07:36,001
This is my homeroom.

201
00:07:36,101 --> 00:07:36,281
No.

202
00:07:36,621 --> 00:07:36,841
Oh.

203
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:38,821
Mom.

204
00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:39,281
Oh.

205
00:07:39,941 --> 00:07:40,721
I got the good seat.

206
00:07:40,881 --> 00:07:42,141
Oh, god damn it, Mom.

207
00:07:42,201 --> 00:07:42,821
Hey, don't swear.

208
00:07:43,701 --> 00:07:44,661
G.D., Mom.

209
00:07:46,021 --> 00:07:46,341
What?

210
00:07:46,441 --> 00:07:47,981
You took the last seat and back.

211
00:07:48,121 --> 00:07:49,301
There's only one seat in front.

212
00:07:49,501 --> 00:07:50,841
Who's this, nerd?

213
00:07:51,281 --> 00:07:51,581
No.

214
00:07:53,081 --> 00:07:53,861
No, no, no.

215
00:07:53,861 --> 00:07:55,401
My mom was just leaving.

216
00:07:55,581 --> 00:07:55,701
Mom?

217
00:07:56,101 --> 00:07:57,541
That weird lady's leaving.

218
00:08:00,001 --> 00:08:05,501
Mr. Johnson, I'm being harassed by this dweeb.

219
00:08:07,121 --> 00:08:07,981
No, no.

220
00:08:08,661 --> 00:08:19,261
Dweeb in front Just sit down Stop harassing the cool kids in the back Mom What Haven you seen Never Been Kissed

221
00:08:19,881 --> 00:08:20,781
Yeah, I have.

222
00:08:20,801 --> 00:08:21,721
I love that movie.

223
00:08:22,341 --> 00:08:23,601
Now I have a chance.

224
00:08:24,341 --> 00:08:24,821
Mom!

225
00:08:24,941 --> 00:08:25,781
A chance to be cool.

226
00:08:25,901 --> 00:08:26,581
You have a child.

227
00:08:26,681 --> 00:08:27,701
You've been kissed before.

228
00:08:28,701 --> 00:08:29,521
Actually, no.

229
00:08:29,761 --> 00:08:30,121
What?

230
00:08:30,481 --> 00:08:31,881
Your father and I don't do that.

231
00:08:32,421 --> 00:08:32,821
What?

232
00:08:33,001 --> 00:08:34,861
He doesn't like my lips.

233
00:08:35,861 --> 00:08:37,901
I don't like them that much right now either.

234
00:08:38,141 --> 00:08:40,421
You imagine your husband saying that to you.

235
00:08:41,061 --> 00:08:43,621
And then your daughter not wanting you to be cool.

236
00:08:44,081 --> 00:08:49,021
Mom, can we not have this conversation across rows and rows of other students?

237
00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:50,621
So what if everyone's looking?

238
00:08:51,281 --> 00:08:52,261
They're all...

239
00:08:52,261 --> 00:08:53,261
Mom, they're all...

240
00:08:53,261 --> 00:08:54,441
They're looking at my feet.

241
00:08:54,681 --> 00:08:55,241
Fine.

242
00:08:56,321 --> 00:08:56,641
They're...

243
00:08:56,641 --> 00:08:57,141
Oh my god.

244
00:08:57,241 --> 00:08:59,661
They're all congregating around you and they're pointing at me.

245
00:08:59,961 --> 00:09:02,361
Well, you don't look very good right now.

246
00:09:03,601 --> 00:09:05,341
But I look like you.

247
00:09:05,341 --> 00:09:06,161
I'm like a...

248
00:09:06,161 --> 00:09:07,701
I'm a young version of you.

249
00:09:07,901 --> 00:09:09,041
With all my toes.

250
00:09:10,181 --> 00:09:13,281
I can't believe you just went there.

251
00:09:13,861 --> 00:09:14,481
Oh my God.

252
00:09:14,541 --> 00:09:14,781
Oh.

253
00:09:15,441 --> 00:09:16,301
You know I'm sensitive.

254
00:09:16,641 --> 00:09:17,641
Hey, leave her alone.

255
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,101
Why are you treating her like that?

256
00:09:22,401 --> 00:09:23,701
She's the cool one.

257
00:09:23,921 --> 00:09:25,681
I wish that was my mother.

258
00:09:26,921 --> 00:09:30,041
I'm cutting off one of my toes just to be like her.

259
00:09:30,301 --> 00:09:30,901
Mom.

260
00:09:31,101 --> 00:09:31,521
What?

261
00:09:31,521 --> 00:09:32,921
I can't help it.

262
00:09:33,181 --> 00:09:34,881
They all love you.

263
00:09:36,201 --> 00:09:36,901
Aren't you?

264
00:09:36,901 --> 00:09:38,701
No, Mr. Johnson, what are you doing?

265
00:09:39,121 --> 00:09:39,741
Mr. Johnson!

266
00:09:40,861 --> 00:09:43,881
I'm sorry, I put a whoopee cushion on your seat.

267
00:09:44,661 --> 00:09:48,601
And I'm gonna make you sit on it in front of the whole class.

268
00:09:49,801 --> 00:09:50,881
Mr. Johnson, no!

269
00:09:53,221 --> 00:09:54,421
Cut to that night at home.

270
00:09:56,681 --> 00:09:58,061
Hey, honey. Hey, sweetheart.

271
00:09:58,901 --> 00:10:02,341
Hi, Mom. How was Brian Lasky's car?

272
00:10:02,761 --> 00:10:03,821
It's a convertible, huh?

273
00:10:03,821 --> 00:10:06,021
Oh, yeah. Oh, and he gave me a beer.

274
00:10:06,021 --> 00:10:14,901
oh god yeah and he cut one of his toes off so romantic mom and he kissed me oh he kissed me

275
00:10:14,901 --> 00:10:25,141
on the lips oh you've finally been kissed i know finally been kissed uh does that mean you'll leave

276
00:10:25,141 --> 00:10:31,241
me alone yeah that's all we wanted you're not gonna come to school anymore no i got what i

277
00:10:31,241 --> 00:10:36,901
wanted your father's moving out and the name of the boy you said is moving in brian lasky's movie

278
00:10:36,901 --> 00:10:39,561
get in here kiss these lips

279
00:10:39,561 --> 00:10:43,001
i didn't see