welcome to very fine friends bonus improv joke we please get a suggestion
your suggestion is mature
mature
I think
the
term mature
like referring to old people
or older like
geriatrics yeah
I think that's
worse than just saying old
I don't know why
the euphemism
I don't know.
It sounds condescending to me.
When I hear mature, I think of
like how when I was a kid,
I was always considered more mature than other kids.
So in my mind, it's more of a mental thing.
Yeah.
I picture you as like a kid in a little suit.
Did you wear suits a lot?
Maybe you're just picturing my communion photo.
Where you were.
No, I mean, you're so well-dressed now.
I figure you probably always were very well dressed.
Not the case.
I have school photos of me in like Looney Tunes shirts.
T-shirts.
I think whenever my dad was in control, all bets were off.
Yeah.
When I had my own like ownership of myself.
And I think my junior year school picture, I was in an In-N-Out t-shirt.
Oh, okay.
Which sucks because it was the year I was the hottest.
Seventh grade?
Junior.
Oh, junior.
Why did I process that at seventh grade?
That's better.
Yeah.
Much better.
I don't know why I was...
I would not be referring to myself as hot at 12.
Whoa.
Whoops.
Whoops-a-daisies.
When were you the hottest?
Besides now.
I was going to say right now.
And then...
No, no, now.
Now.
Now is it now?
No.
Refresh now.
I don't know.
I mean, probably sometime in my 20s.
That's probably 20, 21.
Nice.
Yeah.
Show me some pictures later.
I don really think I have any You were too busy living in your hotness Yeah Yeah I get it And I not really a big picture person I don care for it I don like being photographed either Yeah And now improv
Caitlin, step over here, please.
Yeah.
All right.
I don't know why you're being so difficult with all the other teachers,
but we have to get this yearbook closed down.
so just stand over there on the spot
I'm going to be taking your picture today. No.
Yes. No.
No, I'm sorry.
Just can't you put a not
not pictured thing where my
spot should be in your book?
Any other year we could but you know that
recent legislation has passed that says
every student must be photographed and published.
I can't do anything about this. Damn my
congressman. Why did he vote for that?
Write a letter. Now stand over on the X.
No, no, don't make me do it.
I'm making you do it.
stand there now all right you could make me stand there but it doesn't doesn't mean that
you're gonna get the photo that you want i don't care as long as you're smiling i've done my job
okay well just don't make me all right fine all right and smile okay i'm smiling no you're not
yeah i am this is how i smile don't judge how i smile listen i've seen a hundred smiles that's
not a smile here oh no no look at the birdie no tweet tweet hey look at me oops i farted
no oops i don't like scatological humor okay let me check the book hold on um
smile
Ha ha!
Joke's on you.
Why?
I just held up a fake face in front of me with a smile on it.
That's not my real face.
Ha ha!
I don't know why this has been a joke to you.
That was the last click on my camera.
I'm gonna get fired over this.
Well, you shouldn't try to make me.
I had to.
No, you didn't.
If a law is unjust, you could break that law.
That is-
This is the hill you're going to die on?
I can't feed my family now.
Okay, you don't- you're not out of a job yet.
Once they see this picture, I'm over.
I'm done.
Well, there's still a way we could prevent your firing.
Oh, now you want to help?
Okay, what's your big idea?
Well you didn want to help me Maybe I shouldn try and help you It wasn about what I wanted It wasn about what I wanted either That for damn sure Great When a rock meets a hard place
All right.
How are we going to...
You tell me, idea girl.
127 hours our way out of this...
I don't know.
...rocking hard place.
I'm willing to try, but what's your idea?
All right.
I'm just going to...
I know what I have to do.
Oh god, I'm really, really taking one for the team here, though.
Well, this is your fault.
I'm going to have to strap this fake face to my head and walk around with it for two or three months.
So no one knows it was...
No one thinks it's a fake. They just think that's what I look like.
This could work.
Okay.
Alright. Here goes nothing.
okay thank you cut to the principal's office
you wanted to see me principal gordon i did i did okay we had a complaint from a librarian
who overheard a troubling conversation between you and a photographer principal gordon i don't
know what you're talking about was was it is was it because i have a hard time smiling that's really
my only problem but as you can see i'm always smiling now i figured it out there be some
disturbing allegations that's your face not be your face i see i see
Principal Gordon
just
I assure you it's my real face
put your hand really close
but don't actually touch it
and then you'll see
it's my real face
okay
oh see
close
but doesn't it feel like you're close
to a real face
you're on thin eyes
I'm going to be watching.
You've done a great job since coming here from the bayou.
Cut to my parents' house.
My house.
Honey.
Hey, Mom.
What's on your face?
It's just my face, Mom.
What are you talking about?
Honey what on your face What are you wearing What is that No I wearing my face Paul get in here Mom this is so insulting Do you not know what I look like I know your face I birthed your face
Yes, you birthed this.
This smiling monstrosity.
What is it?
Are you wearing cardboard?
No, this is...
Paul!
I'm wearing skin.
You're lying.
Get back down here, young lady.
Honey, don't lie to your mother.
No, I'm wearing...
I'm wearing my own real face.
This is my real smile.
Okay, then you won't mind if I try and take it off?
Just, no, you can't.
Put your hand close to, but not touching my face.
Who would agree to these terms?
Well, Principal Gordon was very accommodating.
Slap yourself.
Why is your face swinging as though on a hinge?
Mom.
Paul!
No, mom, mom.
It's hinge face.
It's the new trend.
All the kids are doing it at school.
Just trust me on this one, okay?
I worked too hard to have this argument.
You're right.
if that's the face you want to have have it
cut to
yearbook day
with the photographer
oh say
hey okay
I think I've done
I think I've done all I can do I don't
think everyone's buying it I can't thank
you enough god you I mean you're still
employed right yeah no one's fired me
the picture looks great
I don't want to apologize for the way I talked to you
I know that the principal gave you a hard time
but
yeah
my mom was easy
it was the principal
he's got that
Louisiana sense of justice
yeah he's out to get you
yeah he is
but I think we dodged a bullet
I just want to thank you
in another world we could be friends
why not this world
the age gap
oh that's fair
yeah so uh yeah shaking my hands it has been a pleasure yep um let's not do this again
all right well can i finally take this monstrosity off yeah i think you'll be fine
okay good oh oh what in the hell i knew it principal gordon you're just burning and you're
fired.
No! That's
Gator Jousters.
Unseen.