welcome to very very fine friends
bonus bonus
improv
Joe
can we please get a suggestion
for our improv
your suggestion is eczema
eczema
hmm
I don't think it should be called that
because it really has nothing to do with eggs
or zima
the drink
is that like a wine cooler
it was like a
smirnoff ice before there was smirnoff ice
I have a distinct memory
of being in a van
with someone
as a child
and them coming out of a liquor store
and they had a case of Fuzzy Navels.
Do you remember Fuzzy Navels?
And they let me have some.
What?
Yeah.
Was this...
Was this before or after they gave you candy?
Yeah, I know.
That was the candy.
A stranger?
No, it was like a friend of my dad's.
Did he say,
little boy.
You're not making this better.
I'm a friend of your father's.
get in my van. I don't remember
anything else. I just remember I got to taste
the fuzzy navel and as an adult I think
that's a horribly disgusting name for
a drink. It is.
Is that a peachy drink? I think
so. Is navel a type
of peach? It's a type of orange.
Oh yeah, you're right. It's a type of orange.
Oh, I never
put that together. I thought this was a belly button thing.
I mean, that is gross.
I think that's what it's supposed to
make you think. I choose to think
it's about the fruit because it is gross if it's about
the belly button a fuzzy belly button take this back to the kitchen yeah i am a little worried
about what memories you're repressing here you guys uh i'm okay uh you were alone with a friend
of your dad's in his van and he gave you drinks and he got you drunk you don't remember anything
else after that you don't understand vans are everywhere in the early 90s and then also when
i asked my dad about him he said he had never heard of him before where were you all afternoon
I have no friends
oh that's funny
well I'm glad you're
you're okay with it it's not worrying you
well fuzzy navel
how old were you
don't know don't remember
younger than 10
okay
why was I sipping on a fuzzy navel
I don't know
yeah it one thing if you were like like high school age and it like you can have a sip of a beer Yeah I still don think that advisable if it someone else child
Yeah, exactly.
But at least that it's like, okay, you're going to be drinking soon.
You might even be drinking right now.
I'm the cool one.
I'm a cool perv.
I'm one of those cool pervs.
No, don't tell your dad.
This is called grooming.
Yeah.
that's weird yeah um i wonder why smirnoff ice made it but zima didn't
because like that was even really was was it just ahead of its time or is it because have you ever
heard of icing icing yeah it's um maybe that zima just didn't have a cool game like icing
icing is this thing where you'd i think people still could theoretically do it to this day
where you hide a Smirnoff ice someplace
and then if somebody finds it,
whoever finds it has to immediately,
I think they take a knee and chug the Smirnoff ice.
So it's a big thing in college.
You'd put it in someone's medicine cabinet or something
so they're waking up to brush their teeth
and they open it and they have to chug a Smirnoff ice
first thing in the morning.
Or in the dishwasher, someone's just doing dishes
and then there's a Smirnoff ice in there.
That's kind of fun.
It is kind of a fun game.
Yeah.
Yeah, Zima didn't have a game.
That's right.
And also, almost no one else does.
I don't know if that explains it.
Well, but I mean, Zima wasn't good.
Spirit of Ice isn't good.
So in the marketplace of ideas, what needs to set one of them?
Actually, yeah, maybe your dad's friend was just playing a fun game.
Anytime you buy a pack of fuzzy navels, you have to give it to someone who's under 10.
Yeah.
Well, those are so light on alcohol.
It's called naveling.
it's called fuzzing
it's called inies and outies
maybe because there was a product called noxzema
that was a facial cream yeah maybe i like the way that smelled me too
that was good i like all intense smells that are medicinal yeah
and now improv
Rachel, sorry it took me so long.
Oh, no problem.
What was going on?
I got us a pizza.
Oh, great.
Thank you.
Oh, pizza.
Yeah, it smells good, isn't it?
Just remember, you have to throw the first slice in someone's face.
It can't be me.
I know, I know, I know the game.
I don't mean to repeat the rules.
I know we've been playing this for years.
Oh God I wish I just wish you didn bring this pizza to this orphanage Because they hungry for pizza Yeah and they don understand the game yet
But rules are rules.
Rules are rules.
Plus, they can still eat it even if they take it to the face.
Well, no, they're not allowed.
That's part of the rules.
Oh, I always forget that one sub part.
All right.
Well, oh, God, this pizza looks so good.
Oh, it's hot.
Oh, yeah.
Hot, hot, hot, hot.
Hi, Miss Rachel.
rules are rules oh that was cute
how much makes you want a kid never oh man this is so good it's really good i also got us beverages
oh yeah yeah here's a two liter of mellow yellow oh you know what you have to do i know what i have
to do
I have to
find a dog
and
force him to drink half of it
while I ride it
rules are rules
oh here comes a Yorkie
oh god I wish he was a bigger dog
oh hey hey little guy
hey little guy come here
Let me put this saddle on you.
Now drink this mellow yellow.
The second half of this mellow yellow is so good.
Oh, yeah, it's so good.
I love our life.
Oh, that poor Yorkie eats.
He's okay.
He's limping away.
He'll be all right.
Or whatever.
He's learned an important lesson.
Don't come into this room.
The lesson is also rules are rules.
Rolls are rolls.
Did you bring anything?
Yeah, I did.
I brought this comically oversized Q-tip.
Oh.
Yeah.
Somehow still very light.
I know.
I know, but...
Oh, it's a big Q-tip.
You know what they say.
I have to...
spin around it like a stripper.
Yep.
before I can use it
as a giant jousting mechanism.
Because we were going to play joust later.
And rules are rules.
Rules are rules.
Could I get a little bow chicka wow wow?
All right.
Bow chicka wow wow.
Wow.
Bow chicka wow.
Upside down.
Bow chicka wow.
All right Rules are rules Rules are rules Which speaking of which since I did the Bow Chicka Wow Wow music you know the rule Yeah Whenever you do that
You have to.
You have to sew an extra button to the top of your shirt.
God, it's already so tight.
You got a lot of buttons on there.
Yeah, I know.
I've said that song a lot today.
Yeah.
Hold on.
Let me joust this.
Oh.
What do you think jousting is?
I think you just threw that Q-tip.
Well, yeah.
There was no horses allowed because rules are rules of the orphanage.
Rules are rules.
No horses, they say.
I know.
God, why did we choose to hang out at an orphanage today?
Because it was next to our house.
Oh, that's right.
And the rule is.
You have to go what's next to your house.
Yep.
Yeah.
And everyone knows when you're in an orphanage, you have to take one.
You have to take one.
Yep.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, I picked last time.
You go first this time.
Okay.
Hey, you.
Pick me.
No, no.
You want it too bad.
I don't care either way.
Get in here.
Oh, nice band.
All right.
Okay.
I guess it's my turn now.
Yeah.
I'm going to peruse.
You picked a young girl.
Okay.
I'll pick a boy.
just even things out um i finally got this grease off my face from the pizza
yeah but you have that burn mark now i don't want you oh okay um you there little boy me who is
happy here what's yes oh you're enjoying yourself i love it here yes you don't want to leave no i
I'm head boy.
Head boy, huh?
Yeah.
Everyone loves me.
I'm almost, I'm guaranteed a family at the end of the week.
Yay.
You're coming with me.
Oh!
Get in the van.
Okay.
Oh.
He acquiesced a little too easily.
They're not training these kids well.
No, they're not.
Here, kid.
Have a fuzzy navel.
Well, you know what they say when you take two orphanages or orphans in a van.
You know what the rule is.
You have to spin around, spin them around really fast and let them go in a random part of town.
Yep.
And scene.