1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:23,000 I've taken a few yoga classes lately, not trying to be like a yogi or anything, just 2 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:23,540 trying it out. 3 00:00:24,140 --> 00:00:28,780 And one thing that they do in yoga is they're very breath focused, right? 4 00:00:28,780 --> 00:00:29,240 Uh-huh. 5 00:00:29,240 --> 00:00:35,780 So it's a lot of like inhale, like exhale through the mouth. 6 00:00:35,780 --> 00:00:38,600 And then like everyone in the class just goes, right? 7 00:00:38,660 --> 00:00:45,760 Like it's like, so the other day I was in class and the old woman next to me, I don't 8 00:00:45,760 --> 00:00:50,880 know what she thought the exhale was supposed to sound like, but it was like a, everybody 9 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:53,620 breathing through your nose. 10 00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:02,380 It was like she was expelling a demon or something. 11 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:03,200 Maybe she did. 12 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:07,180 She sounded like a deranged horse every single time. 13 00:01:07,260 --> 00:01:07,540 It was like. 14 00:01:09,340 --> 00:01:11,580 It was so funny. 15 00:01:11,860 --> 00:01:17,620 You think as if it was me and I let that noise out the first time and then no one else did it? 16 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:18,680 No, she did. 17 00:01:18,740 --> 00:01:19,740 It's not happening again. 18 00:01:21,320 --> 00:01:27,280 No, this was clearly not like her first class because she had her like own like mat set up. 19 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:33,460 and yeah just it's like i made this old broads just oh this is her game she's trying to make 20 00:01:33,460 --> 00:01:36,700 happen yeah like she's going out every studio in town like 21 00:01:36,700 --> 00:01:46,400 she sounded like a horse i can't replicate i wish i i wish i had recording of it uh it was funny 22 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:51,940 though and it was taking me out of it in a fun way i'm glad i was taken out of yoga that way 23 00:01:51,940 --> 00:01:55,780 because she was distracting to me. 24 00:01:56,540 --> 00:02:00,760 Did you know that I got asked to leave a Pilates class once? 25 00:02:01,420 --> 00:02:01,760 No. 26 00:02:01,820 --> 00:02:05,140 Because somebody farted and I laughed and I couldn't stop laughing. 27 00:02:05,140 --> 00:02:06,320 And so I had to go. 28 00:02:06,740 --> 00:02:07,960 They asked you to leave? 29 00:02:08,140 --> 00:02:09,100 Yeah, that was loud. 30 00:02:09,640 --> 00:02:11,320 That was, yeah. 31 00:02:12,220 --> 00:02:16,500 I feel like if I was the person, I mean, if it's someone laughing, 32 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:18,740 it's like, oh, okay, like we're human beings. 33 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:20,040 We can all laugh at things, right? 34 00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:27,160 I mean, I'm not, I don't not understand why I had to go, but yeah. 35 00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:33,620 I feel like if I was the person who did that, and then you were asked to leave because of that, 36 00:02:33,780 --> 00:02:37,480 I would feel even more uncomfortable about what had happened. 37 00:02:37,780 --> 00:02:39,980 Well, I wish she'd been there to fart. 38 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:42,680 Me too, Francis. 39 00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:43,560 Me too. 40 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:49,300 Welcome to Friends Like Us, a podcast where friends talk about stuff. 41 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:57,400 um how are you francis sorry i caught you mid-siv of water it's okay we're promoting 42 00:02:57,400 --> 00:03:02,920 water now i've only had some water 43 00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:13,460 does your grandma sound like this she needs more water go from boom to 44 00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:20,400 water that was our ad read for water water we'll find a way to make money on it later 45 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:27,400 oh we're making money on it yeah no drinking water not paying us if you drink water and you 46 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:37,820 haven't paid us god help you and violence to come your way yes yeah it's gonna be old testament 47 00:03:37,820 --> 00:03:39,180 style. 48 00:03:40,700 --> 00:03:41,760 Wrath will be 49 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:43,400 raining down upon you. 50 00:03:43,980 --> 00:03:45,320 Guys, don't drink water 51 00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:47,820 unless you pay us first. That's all 52 00:03:47,820 --> 00:03:49,280 we're asking. I think they get it. 53 00:03:49,660 --> 00:03:51,360 They get it. Our listeners are good. 54 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:52,900 They wouldn't 55 00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:55,660 drink water. No. They're good people. 56 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:57,680 No. Thirsty, paying people. 57 00:03:58,280 --> 00:03:59,260 Salt of the earth 58 00:03:59,260 --> 00:04:00,960 and the salt makes them thirsty. 59 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:01,560 They're thirsty. 60 00:04:07,820 --> 00:04:15,080 Quick interruption. Every week on the podcast, our producer Joe gives Francis and I each our own 61 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:22,380 secret word. Throughout the course of the podcast, we need to find a way to slip the secret word 62 00:04:22,380 --> 00:04:27,860 into our conversation without the other person noticing. If the other person can correctly guess 63 00:04:27,860 --> 00:04:35,540 the secret word, they get a point. And right before we die, we add up all the points. And 64 00:04:35,540 --> 00:04:39,740 then we get a prize, whoever has the most points for guessing the most secret words. 65 00:04:41,260 --> 00:04:44,060 Here's Joe with today's secret words. 66 00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:48,040 Jenna's secret word is vouching. 67 00:04:48,660 --> 00:04:51,380 Francis's secret word is legwork. 68 00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:53,160 Back to the podcast. 69 00:04:54,380 --> 00:04:58,120 Well, I think it's time to get to our first segment. 70 00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:01,980 I think it's time for the invention of the week. 71 00:05:04,620 --> 00:05:05,260 Inventions. 72 00:05:05,540 --> 00:05:18,480 i was thinking about this earlier and i think you're gonna love this great i know i say that 73 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:23,180 every time and you're right every time yeah the invention is 74 00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:31,140 you know how you have to get your hair cut i do you know how annoying it is i do how expensive it 75 00:05:31,140 --> 00:05:43,360 is i do not anymore oh i have invented a pair of gloves that you put on and it's a like a virtual 76 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:53,520 reality okay and it controls robot hands that you stand in front of okay so you can actually 77 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,560 give yourself your own salon cut 78 00:05:56,560 --> 00:05:59,580 so 79 00:05:59,580 --> 00:06:08,620 so i'm cutting my own hair essentially yeah i see one major flaw in this 80 00:06:08,620 --> 00:06:14,940 i'm not good at cutting hair not at first but it comes with a booklet okay but but i'm 81 00:06:14,940 --> 00:06:23,080 experimenting on myself well no because there's a tester bob okay so it comes with a mannequin head 82 00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:26,940 with hair that's exactly like my hair now 83 00:06:26,940 --> 00:06:28,980 so that I can practice my haircut. 84 00:06:31,740 --> 00:06:35,520 Will there be an option to record the practice 85 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,160 just in case I nail it right out of the gate? 86 00:06:37,380 --> 00:06:40,940 Can you just in general record the session 87 00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:42,840 so you don't have to constantly do it again? 88 00:06:43,060 --> 00:06:46,200 Yes, and I neglected to mention a really nice feature of this invention 89 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:50,100 is you first type in what you're going for 90 00:06:50,100 --> 00:06:51,100 or how you want it to look. 91 00:06:51,100 --> 00:06:58,360 And as you start to make the cut, the gloves will vibrate if you're going off track. 92 00:06:58,860 --> 00:06:59,480 Okay. 93 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:00,560 Another question. 94 00:07:01,740 --> 00:07:06,300 Why not just program the haircut directly to the robot hands? 95 00:07:06,380 --> 00:07:07,960 Why do my hands need to be involved? 96 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:17,640 The relationship between a stylist and a customer is hard to break. 97 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:22,560 and I think it'll be a good opportunity for people to connect with themselves. 98 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,000 Talk to themselves. 99 00:07:25,380 --> 00:07:28,380 So I have to be making awkward small talk with myself. 100 00:07:28,620 --> 00:07:29,200 And responding. 101 00:07:30,620 --> 00:07:31,140 Okay. 102 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:35,680 I don't know how I feel about this. 103 00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:36,660 Are you picturing it though? 104 00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:38,200 Yes. 105 00:07:38,740 --> 00:07:44,360 I'm picturing the listeners at home can't see what my hands are doing. 106 00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:46,760 But they're going to work. 107 00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:47,580 They're going to town. 108 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:55,480 Yeah, and then behind you, imagine how cool it would feel to be in control of your own haircut. 109 00:07:55,620 --> 00:07:56,700 It's like driving your own car. 110 00:07:58,160 --> 00:08:01,020 I don't know that it is. 111 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:02,240 You're right. 112 00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:03,480 It'd be like driving a car behind you. 113 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:05,440 Kind of. 114 00:08:06,300 --> 00:08:08,600 And I don't know if I would be good at that. 115 00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:09,680 I'm really worried. 116 00:08:09,940 --> 00:08:11,060 I don't think you understand. 117 00:08:11,580 --> 00:08:13,380 I don't even like cutting wrapping paper. 118 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:14,700 That's how bad I am. 119 00:08:14,700 --> 00:08:18,860 I can't get an even cut to save my life. 120 00:08:19,380 --> 00:08:22,320 I don't think I'd be good on my own hair. 121 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:23,920 Well, put on gloves next time. 122 00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:26,060 Next time I do wrapping paper? 123 00:08:26,060 --> 00:08:26,260 Yeah. 124 00:08:27,260 --> 00:08:27,700 He's in. 125 00:08:27,700 --> 00:08:28,880 That was the problem? 126 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:31,700 I was direct skin to scissor contact? 127 00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:35,860 I find that gloves solve a lot of problems. 128 00:08:36,780 --> 00:08:38,920 What other problems have gloves solved for you? 129 00:08:39,780 --> 00:08:41,180 Well, not me, but OJ. 130 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:43,120 That's true. 131 00:08:44,700 --> 00:08:49,880 They didn't solve any problems for Nicole Brown and the other guy. 132 00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:51,380 Ron? 133 00:08:52,460 --> 00:08:53,280 Am I making that up? 134 00:08:53,740 --> 00:08:54,700 No, I think that sounds right. 135 00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:56,040 Sorry, other guy. 136 00:08:56,140 --> 00:08:58,160 If you're listening, we know you are. 137 00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:58,820 Sorry, maybe Ron. 138 00:08:58,900 --> 00:08:59,060 Yeah. 139 00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:01,480 You know, you can't please everyone. 140 00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:02,280 Yeah. 141 00:09:03,020 --> 00:09:03,420 So. 142 00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:07,080 And there's other glove victories. 143 00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:09,460 Glove compartment. 144 00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:12,440 That's a really good victory for gloves. 145 00:09:12,680 --> 00:09:13,520 Ron Goldman. 146 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:14,660 Ron Goldman. 147 00:09:14,700 --> 00:09:16,200 Ron Goldman I'm sorry 148 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:18,140 when you're listening to this up in heaven 149 00:09:18,140 --> 00:09:20,800 forgive me for not remembering your name 150 00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:22,800 have a drink of water for free on us 151 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:26,280 this one's on us kid 152 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:29,040 sorry you got murdered 153 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:30,040 here's some water 154 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:42,989 okay so you back to the invention these robot okay they will only be able to cut hair 155 00:09:45,989 --> 00:09:49,149 You look so frustrated that I'm not embracing your vision. 156 00:09:49,149 --> 00:09:51,149 I was preparing to contemplate the question. 157 00:09:51,349 --> 00:09:51,509 Okay. 158 00:09:51,609 --> 00:09:52,469 So you're saying what now? 159 00:09:52,629 --> 00:09:57,949 Well, I mean, theoretically, you're just saying these are gloves and then robot hands do whatever your gloves say. 160 00:09:58,529 --> 00:09:58,769 Yeah. 161 00:09:58,869 --> 00:10:04,649 Now, you could put the scissors in the hands because guess what these hands can also do? 162 00:10:04,709 --> 00:10:16,069 what massage with the scissors no it's our murder robot you you take the scissors out of the hands 163 00:10:16,069 --> 00:10:24,409 and you put it in massage mode click and then you can massage yourself okay so like when you get a 164 00:10:24,409 --> 00:10:28,089 when you go to get your hair cut and then like they're washing your hair and then they give you 165 00:10:28,089 --> 00:10:34,009 like the scalp massage absolutely okay yeah i mean i think that is probably a more beneficial feature 166 00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:38,489 than giving yourself a haircut. 167 00:10:38,789 --> 00:10:40,669 What if on the screen in front of you, 168 00:10:41,229 --> 00:10:43,469 it simulated the steps? 169 00:10:44,809 --> 00:10:47,389 So you're worried because you're not classically trained. 170 00:10:47,549 --> 00:10:47,729 Yes. 171 00:10:47,889 --> 00:10:50,929 But now it's showing you step by step which strains to cut. 172 00:10:51,249 --> 00:10:54,529 Will it also give me step by step words to say 173 00:10:54,529 --> 00:10:55,949 for awkward conversation? 174 00:10:56,269 --> 00:10:57,849 Yes, and how to steer away from things 175 00:10:57,849 --> 00:10:59,249 you don't want to talk about with you. 176 00:10:59,809 --> 00:11:00,049 Yeah. 177 00:11:01,009 --> 00:11:04,569 Oh, you have a daughter, right? 178 00:11:04,849 --> 00:11:06,129 Oh, sorry, a son. 179 00:11:06,969 --> 00:11:07,409 Yeah. 180 00:11:08,069 --> 00:11:10,809 Yeah, there's a button for a blow dryer sound to kick in right there. 181 00:11:10,949 --> 00:11:11,529 That's perfect. 182 00:11:11,749 --> 00:11:11,869 Yeah. 183 00:11:13,709 --> 00:11:14,189 Okay. 184 00:11:14,769 --> 00:11:20,809 I still think everything but a haircut would be good for these robot hands. 185 00:11:20,829 --> 00:11:22,029 Well, you might have just named this thing. 186 00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:23,689 Everything but a haircut? 187 00:11:24,169 --> 00:11:24,369 Yeah. 188 00:11:25,069 --> 00:11:26,649 Did you have another name in mind? 189 00:11:26,649 --> 00:11:29,169 the best I could come up with is 190 00:11:29,169 --> 00:11:30,229 um 191 00:11:30,229 --> 00:11:31,569 me's or hands 192 00:11:31,569 --> 00:11:35,109 like scissor with me 193 00:11:35,109 --> 00:11:36,869 like Sid with scissor hands but 194 00:11:36,869 --> 00:11:39,049 me because it's doing things for you 195 00:11:39,049 --> 00:11:40,949 ah yes 196 00:11:40,949 --> 00:11:43,369 or 197 00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:45,489 that's more of a tagline 198 00:11:45,489 --> 00:11:46,949 I was thinking like the gloves are on 199 00:11:46,949 --> 00:11:50,009 very good 200 00:11:50,009 --> 00:11:51,929 gloves are off 201 00:11:51,929 --> 00:11:54,449 very good 202 00:11:54,449 --> 00:11:56,009 yay 203 00:11:56,009 --> 00:11:57,149 whose kid is this 204 00:11:57,149 --> 00:12:00,009 you did it 205 00:12:00,009 --> 00:12:01,409 you strung a thought together 206 00:12:01,409 --> 00:12:04,209 okay 207 00:12:04,209 --> 00:12:06,229 I still feel like 208 00:12:06,229 --> 00:12:06,669 if you can 209 00:12:06,669 --> 00:12:10,369 it feels like the hands 210 00:12:10,369 --> 00:12:10,909 are given 211 00:12:10,909 --> 00:12:13,989 you've got like training wheels for your hands 212 00:12:13,989 --> 00:12:16,329 it feels more like a teaching aid 213 00:12:16,329 --> 00:12:17,749 than anything like functional 214 00:12:17,749 --> 00:12:19,869 like if it's like vibrating and telling you 215 00:12:19,869 --> 00:12:21,129 like when you're making a mistake 216 00:12:21,129 --> 00:12:22,789 I feel like this is a good way to learn 217 00:12:22,789 --> 00:12:24,949 No, that's just so you get better at cutting your own hair. 218 00:12:26,169 --> 00:12:30,449 But then, why not just, well, who cares? 219 00:12:30,689 --> 00:12:33,909 If you don't have to interact with another human being, who cares? 220 00:12:33,989 --> 00:12:35,429 Just have the robot cut your hair. 221 00:12:35,569 --> 00:12:37,789 Just input the hairstyle, and then just the robot does it. 222 00:12:38,169 --> 00:12:41,969 And your hands can sit there unfettered, ungloved. 223 00:12:43,249 --> 00:12:43,609 Ungloved. 224 00:12:45,009 --> 00:12:46,149 I actually like that idea. 225 00:12:46,309 --> 00:12:46,929 I'm willing to pivot. 226 00:12:47,549 --> 00:12:47,809 Okay. 227 00:12:49,089 --> 00:12:51,229 So now, all right, we're pivoting to. 228 00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:52,229 It's the robot that cuts your hair. 229 00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:53,949 okay sexy 230 00:12:53,949 --> 00:12:56,329 and massages you 231 00:12:56,329 --> 00:12:57,649 and massages you yes 232 00:12:57,649 --> 00:13:00,369 does it it would be really funny 233 00:13:00,369 --> 00:13:02,449 if the robot used one of those like little 234 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,489 handheld massagers still like they use 235 00:13:04,489 --> 00:13:06,029 at the salon can't use its own fingers 236 00:13:06,029 --> 00:13:08,369 no it's still gonna strap 237 00:13:08,369 --> 00:13:10,149 something on and massage you with that 238 00:13:10,149 --> 00:13:12,509 okay so is it now called 239 00:13:12,509 --> 00:13:13,109 ungloved 240 00:13:13,109 --> 00:13:16,589 no glove 241 00:13:16,589 --> 00:13:17,229 no glove 242 00:13:17,229 --> 00:13:20,049 again that's more of a tagline 243 00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:21,289 no glove yes love 244 00:13:21,289 --> 00:13:28,709 yeah yes love that's kind of cute yeah it's always a little british yes love yes love is it a full 245 00:13:28,709 --> 00:13:36,389 robot or is it just hands just hands it's like a box of hands box of fans you open the box and the 246 00:13:36,389 --> 00:13:42,409 hands come out like a jack in the box if they're like getting out oh oh wait climbing out like 247 00:13:42,409 --> 00:13:48,549 creepy stuff like no they could they'll wave they're not there to be creepy okay they can also 248 00:13:48,549 --> 00:13:53,689 get bugs think about that these hands can do it all they can get bugs you know like oh my god 249 00:13:53,689 --> 00:13:59,989 there's a bug oh okay not like like a a bug like a computer bug oh i see why you thought that 250 00:13:59,989 --> 00:14:07,489 like a earth bug oh there's a bug and then it just kind of climbs down from its perch and then run 251 00:14:07,489 --> 00:14:12,609 like yeah does a little hand over to it yeah it has like a laser pointer and you 252 00:14:12,609 --> 00:14:14,629 pointed on the bug 253 00:14:14,629 --> 00:14:16,709 and then knows where to go. Like thing? 254 00:14:16,869 --> 00:14:18,869 Is it like thing from Adam's family? 255 00:14:19,629 --> 00:14:20,409 A little hand? 256 00:14:21,109 --> 00:14:22,469 Well, that's their thing. 257 00:14:24,689 --> 00:14:26,789 Adam's family, we're not trying 258 00:14:26,789 --> 00:14:27,529 to take your thing. 259 00:14:28,249 --> 00:14:30,349 We need more arm. I think we need 260 00:14:30,349 --> 00:14:31,669 up to the elbow. 261 00:14:33,169 --> 00:14:34,309 Up to the elbow. 262 00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:35,609 Another great name. 263 00:14:36,469 --> 00:14:38,649 The names really, there's no end of 264 00:14:38,649 --> 00:14:39,289 good names. 265 00:14:39,289 --> 00:14:39,649 Yeah. 266 00:14:39,649 --> 00:14:43,349 I really feel like this is 267 00:14:43,349 --> 00:14:46,109 going to be a very niche product 268 00:14:46,109 --> 00:14:48,409 you wouldn't buy that in Sharper Image? 269 00:14:49,369 --> 00:14:50,289 are they still around? 270 00:14:51,189 --> 00:14:51,969 I hope so 271 00:14:51,969 --> 00:14:56,129 where else do kids go in the mall and get massages? 272 00:14:57,269 --> 00:14:58,729 is Brookstone still around? 273 00:14:58,949 --> 00:14:59,789 yeah it's gotta be 274 00:14:59,789 --> 00:15:02,069 yeah I hope Sharper Image is too 275 00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:04,809 I think they had the original robot dog 276 00:15:04,809 --> 00:15:05,829 you think? 277 00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:06,649 I think so 278 00:15:06,649 --> 00:15:07,609 bless him 279 00:15:07,609 --> 00:15:09,209 thanks for everything you've done 280 00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:10,949 If you're out there, we're looking for sponsors. 281 00:15:11,649 --> 00:15:12,009 Yeah. 282 00:15:12,029 --> 00:15:12,489 And Brookstone. 283 00:15:13,029 --> 00:15:13,989 Don't stay quiet either. 284 00:15:14,509 --> 00:15:14,849 Yeah. 285 00:15:14,849 --> 00:15:15,749 We'll take both of you. 286 00:15:15,869 --> 00:15:17,729 And I don't think there'll be any conflict of interest there. 287 00:15:17,729 --> 00:15:18,249 No, not at all. 288 00:15:18,589 --> 00:15:19,109 And SkyMall. 289 00:15:19,289 --> 00:15:20,249 SkyMall will take you too. 290 00:15:20,329 --> 00:15:22,389 Oh, I loved SkyMall. 291 00:15:22,649 --> 00:15:22,969 Loved? 292 00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:24,089 Is SkyMall gone too? 293 00:15:24,229 --> 00:15:24,569 It's gone. 294 00:15:24,769 --> 00:15:25,089 Oh. 295 00:15:25,249 --> 00:15:26,629 I mean, at least in the Plains, it's gone. 296 00:15:26,869 --> 00:15:27,329 I don't know if there's still. 297 00:15:27,329 --> 00:15:30,469 Why would they still be publishing if it's not in Plains? 298 00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:33,629 Well, I mean, it was a website that sold shit. 299 00:15:34,369 --> 00:15:37,729 So hopefully they still sell them. 300 00:15:37,789 --> 00:15:38,589 I'm having a memory. 301 00:15:38,589 --> 00:15:41,689 of a giant 302 00:15:41,689 --> 00:15:43,629 crossword 303 00:15:43,629 --> 00:15:45,209 from SkyMall Magazine. 304 00:15:46,409 --> 00:15:47,729 I didn't own it. I just saw it in there. 305 00:15:49,749 --> 00:15:50,909 It was just a 306 00:15:50,909 --> 00:15:52,709 humongous crossword. 307 00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:54,009 You put it on the wall. 308 00:15:54,249 --> 00:15:55,669 And then you're just stuck with it forever? 309 00:15:55,909 --> 00:15:57,749 Maybe it wasn't a crossword. It was something big. 310 00:15:58,169 --> 00:15:58,929 Something to do with words. 311 00:16:00,269 --> 00:16:01,429 It was a dictionary. 312 00:16:01,989 --> 00:16:03,289 A giant dictionary. 313 00:16:04,889 --> 00:16:05,149 Yeah. 314 00:16:06,469 --> 00:16:07,529 Okay. Alright. 315 00:16:08,589 --> 00:16:10,049 No glove, yes love. 316 00:16:11,389 --> 00:16:12,349 Just think on it. 317 00:16:12,669 --> 00:16:16,449 All right, folks, go to friendslikeuspod.com 318 00:16:16,449 --> 00:16:19,669 and pick one of these bad boys up. 319 00:16:20,509 --> 00:16:23,349 Or go to skymall.com and see if it's... 320 00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:24,269 It might be there by now. 321 00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:27,049 They're probably already working on this idea, 322 00:16:27,229 --> 00:16:28,269 but we had it first. 323 00:16:29,109 --> 00:16:30,089 Yeah, we should work with them. 324 00:16:30,789 --> 00:16:31,969 I would do that in a heartbeat. 325 00:16:32,109 --> 00:16:32,429 Are you kidding? 326 00:16:33,029 --> 00:16:35,649 You could be the main product guy for skymall. 327 00:16:36,849 --> 00:16:37,629 I could. 328 00:16:37,629 --> 00:16:38,829 You really could. 329 00:16:39,309 --> 00:16:41,849 I feel like every invention you have is a SkyMall invention. 330 00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:42,449 Thank you. 331 00:16:42,529 --> 00:16:44,509 I choose to accept that as a compliment. 332 00:16:46,189 --> 00:16:52,549 Okay, well, SkyMall, if you're looking for a new head inventor, I'm vouching for Francis. 333 00:16:53,769 --> 00:16:55,049 He can do this. 334 00:16:55,609 --> 00:16:56,729 Tinker sounds, tinker sounds. 335 00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:57,809 Oh, my God, look what I did. 336 00:16:59,189 --> 00:17:00,809 Oh, the lab. 337 00:17:01,169 --> 00:17:03,169 He's in the lab right now. 338 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:05,549 Well, all right. 339 00:17:05,549 --> 00:17:08,709 I think this has been another fantastic invention of the week. 340 00:17:08,789 --> 00:17:09,729 Let's close it up. 341 00:17:09,809 --> 00:17:10,189 Thanks, babe. 342 00:17:12,529 --> 00:17:13,309 It's really good. 343 00:17:13,629 --> 00:17:13,809 Yeah. 344 00:17:14,409 --> 00:17:17,529 We're going to notice immediately the people that have been using this. 345 00:17:18,309 --> 00:17:20,309 Yeah, they're going to be so well cut and so well rested. 346 00:17:20,549 --> 00:17:20,789 Yeah. 347 00:17:22,589 --> 00:17:23,909 Because of their massages. 348 00:17:24,809 --> 00:17:29,109 Yeah, we're probably going to see an uptick of stylists looking for work. 349 00:17:29,789 --> 00:17:30,169 Ooh. 350 00:17:30,589 --> 00:17:32,349 Do you think the stylists are going to come after you? 351 00:17:33,549 --> 00:17:35,209 Does anyone really go after anyone? 352 00:17:35,549 --> 00:17:37,169 Usually people just take it. 353 00:17:37,789 --> 00:17:39,789 Stylus feel like a vindictive bunch. 354 00:17:40,989 --> 00:17:43,209 And I don't mean that necessarily in a bad way, stylus. 355 00:17:43,509 --> 00:17:43,749 Yeah. 356 00:17:43,869 --> 00:17:45,109 If you're listening and I know you are stylus. 357 00:17:45,129 --> 00:17:46,549 The best possible way you can be vindictive. 358 00:17:47,049 --> 00:17:51,489 Well, in a, like, we're not going to let you, we're not going to let you come for us kind of a way. 359 00:17:52,089 --> 00:17:54,089 In a standing up for themselves kind of a way. 360 00:17:54,989 --> 00:17:55,969 You're, I could see that. 361 00:17:56,869 --> 00:17:59,029 I'm just saying that to be nice to our stylus listeners. 362 00:17:59,229 --> 00:18:00,029 I actually do think. 363 00:18:01,669 --> 00:18:03,009 They're a vindictive bunch. 364 00:18:03,949 --> 00:18:05,229 They could just move into dying. 365 00:18:05,549 --> 00:18:09,609 they can move into dying like this color oh 366 00:18:09,609 --> 00:18:23,249 that's well that's harsh i'm out to make money you know that living you're doing move on to dying 367 00:18:23,249 --> 00:18:34,809 because there will never be a robot invented to dye hair and you can't do anything else after 368 00:18:34,809 --> 00:18:35,769 you've done this one job. 369 00:18:37,149 --> 00:18:38,649 Nothing left to do but die. 370 00:18:41,869 --> 00:18:42,909 Well, I think we have 371 00:18:42,909 --> 00:18:44,369 an idea for next week's 372 00:18:44,369 --> 00:18:45,309 invention of the week. 373 00:18:45,789 --> 00:18:46,249 We'll see. 374 00:18:46,249 --> 00:18:47,449 A robot that dies. 375 00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:50,649 And then the week 376 00:18:50,649 --> 00:18:51,009 out of that, 377 00:18:51,289 --> 00:18:52,289 a robot that kills 378 00:18:52,289 --> 00:18:52,909 stylus. 379 00:18:55,909 --> 00:18:57,189 All right. 380 00:18:58,589 --> 00:19:00,029 We've got another 381 00:19:00,029 --> 00:19:01,009 segment to do. 382 00:19:02,269 --> 00:19:03,309 This is a little segment 383 00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:04,249 we like to call 384 00:19:05,209 --> 00:19:06,529 Grandpa's a monster. 385 00:19:08,109 --> 00:19:08,929 No context. 386 00:19:12,549 --> 00:19:14,309 Hey there, sonny. 387 00:19:14,569 --> 00:19:27,619 It your grandpa the monster So in this segment we will be telling beloved childhood memories 388 00:19:28,159 --> 00:19:37,179 And the other person not telling the memory will try to sabotage that memory with fake details, 389 00:19:38,319 --> 00:19:40,119 ruining the memory forever. 390 00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:51,559 francis do you have anything beloved from your childhood i do so i had a grandpa sure um and 391 00:19:51,559 --> 00:20:01,239 when i was young i don't know the exact age probably middle school around there he used to 392 00:20:01,239 --> 00:20:10,319 take me out to the movie theater um and we would go see a movie but he was very old by that time 393 00:20:10,319 --> 00:20:18,759 and he was kind of like he would move kind of slow and so we would go see this movie and then 394 00:20:18,759 --> 00:20:23,999 afterward he would want to movie hop he'd be like come on we're gonna go sneak into another movie 395 00:20:23,999 --> 00:20:30,259 The problem is he was like moving so slow that it was like so obvious what we were doing. 396 00:20:30,819 --> 00:20:34,239 And like, it probably was kind of cute, I guess. 397 00:20:34,439 --> 00:20:38,239 He's like, he would literally like turn back and be like, come on, come on. 398 00:20:38,759 --> 00:20:41,479 And I was like ringing with shame because I was embarrassed. 399 00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:44,599 And I would like follow my grandpa into like the next movie. 400 00:20:44,639 --> 00:20:48,539 So we would spend all day like seeing like three or four movies. 401 00:20:48,539 --> 00:20:55,419 so you probably didn't know that you were actually your grandpa's drug mule 402 00:20:55,419 --> 00:21:04,359 oh the bottom of your popcorn bucket lined with cocaine is that why he always snatched it away 403 00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:10,179 yeah yeah he did and the slow moving was actually code to the other people in the theater did you 404 00:21:10,179 --> 00:21:15,419 ever notice that a lot of people would like go to the bathroom in the theater when your grandfather 405 00:21:15,419 --> 00:21:19,839 would slowly move his way out yeah i was just so happy to be with him i 406 00:21:19,839 --> 00:21:29,879 no this can't be this can't be right i'm sorry what kind of drugs cocaine mostly oh yeah 407 00:21:29,879 --> 00:21:37,319 because the people hadn't had the cocaine yet so they were slow so he didn't want to like 408 00:21:37,319 --> 00:21:44,499 outpace them he's actually quite spry he was he was a very lithe man right up until he died 409 00:21:44,499 --> 00:21:54,359 that doesn't dry with my my personal memory i'm sorry i he had a name right no i mean besides 410 00:21:54,359 --> 00:22:03,519 his real name he had a nickname well what was it it was he was the harkins horker the harkins 411 00:22:03,519 --> 00:22:09,799 horker yeah he used to work drugs all over harkins i've never heard the phrase hork 412 00:22:09,799 --> 00:22:18,119 it's a pretty common phrase in the drug world i've never heard so he was a horker he was a 413 00:22:18,119 --> 00:22:26,179 horker so he only did this at harkins well no he he used to do it he would do it at amc as well 414 00:22:26,179 --> 00:22:31,739 but obviously amc horker doesn't have doesn't have the same ring i would think it'd be something 415 00:22:31,739 --> 00:22:40,899 the stubs oh no they didn't have the stubs program at that time yeah wow i know i'm so sorry no i 416 00:22:40,899 --> 00:22:48,139 mean you were complicit in all of this but are you are you saying that he didn't take me out of love 417 00:22:48,139 --> 00:22:55,599 no honey you were just a really good cover no one's gonna question oh my god mule on mule i know 418 00:22:55,599 --> 00:23:02,459 I know. I'm so sorry. You got a horked big time. The Harkins Horker strikes again. 419 00:23:02,859 --> 00:23:07,079 Well, I'm sure that our other memories are whole. 420 00:23:07,919 --> 00:23:11,279 No. They're horked. Jenna, horked Christmas? 421 00:23:12,859 --> 00:23:16,619 Yeah. Oh, no. That puppy? 422 00:23:16,959 --> 00:23:19,279 No. Full of drugs. 423 00:23:19,279 --> 00:23:25,319 Full of drugs. Just tip-to-tail drugs. 424 00:23:25,599 --> 00:23:27,099 Oh my God. 425 00:23:27,519 --> 00:23:27,839 Yeah. 426 00:23:28,939 --> 00:23:29,979 I'm really sorry. 427 00:23:30,979 --> 00:23:31,419 Wow. 428 00:23:31,759 --> 00:23:33,239 That was meth in the puppies. 429 00:23:33,239 --> 00:23:34,019 Oh, he moved on. 430 00:23:34,259 --> 00:23:35,019 He... 431 00:23:35,019 --> 00:23:37,799 I mean, it was Christmas time, so... 432 00:23:37,799 --> 00:23:40,159 We had to make some extra money from the really desperate people. 433 00:23:40,339 --> 00:23:40,579 Yeah. 434 00:23:41,299 --> 00:23:41,659 Huh. 435 00:23:42,059 --> 00:23:42,799 I'm so sorry. 436 00:23:43,319 --> 00:23:44,799 Well, thank you for telling me this. 437 00:23:46,479 --> 00:23:49,019 I thought you knew, honestly. 438 00:23:49,819 --> 00:23:51,079 We all thought you knew. 439 00:23:51,239 --> 00:23:51,659 Wait a minute. 440 00:23:52,159 --> 00:23:53,359 He was a really hardworking guy. 441 00:23:53,359 --> 00:23:54,939 He used to make pizzas at the pizza shop. 442 00:23:54,939 --> 00:24:02,199 you're telling me that was compromised yeah you know the stuffed crust oh god what was it stuffed 443 00:24:02,199 --> 00:24:10,919 with pcp wow he was did you ever notice people would leave your pizzeria jazzed and they would 444 00:24:10,919 --> 00:24:17,459 just lift cars above their head in a rage that seemed to be unprovoked exactly oh this pizza 445 00:24:17,459 --> 00:24:22,019 I just thought that meant he was such a good pizza man. 446 00:24:22,259 --> 00:24:22,599 No. 447 00:24:23,719 --> 00:24:25,459 He was a terrible pizza man. 448 00:24:25,539 --> 00:24:27,359 Is that why they call him the pizza pusher? 449 00:24:28,499 --> 00:24:31,319 The Oregon's worker and the pizza pusher. 450 00:24:31,619 --> 00:24:31,859 Wow. 451 00:24:31,979 --> 00:24:34,599 Well, he never got caught, so at least things were discreet. 452 00:24:34,599 --> 00:24:35,199 Wait. 453 00:24:35,879 --> 00:24:38,599 You thought he died of natural causes? 454 00:24:40,619 --> 00:24:41,739 What are you saying? 455 00:24:42,879 --> 00:24:43,919 He did. 456 00:24:43,919 --> 00:24:48,619 It was a hail of bullets from the cops, you see. 457 00:24:49,539 --> 00:24:50,859 How'd they get him to look like tumors? 458 00:24:54,399 --> 00:24:58,179 I know, it looked like he had a whole bunch of outside tumors that you could see. 459 00:24:58,879 --> 00:25:01,079 But no, they were inside bullets. 460 00:25:03,939 --> 00:25:06,419 It was a standoff. 461 00:25:07,999 --> 00:25:10,259 How come we didn't notice this? There were so many of us there. 462 00:25:10,259 --> 00:25:15,139 because it was around christmas time and you just thought the blue and red lights were part of the 463 00:25:15,139 --> 00:25:19,819 twinkling decorations i thought they were angels i know and no one wanted to tell you 464 00:25:19,819 --> 00:25:27,919 oh my god i'm so sorry well i'm sure at the very least his beautiful peaceful grave site 465 00:25:27,919 --> 00:25:33,239 is unmolested that tombstone 466 00:25:33,239 --> 00:25:36,119 it's hollowed out 467 00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:36,679 no 468 00:25:36,679 --> 00:25:38,319 it's 469 00:25:38,319 --> 00:25:39,799 filled with 470 00:25:39,799 --> 00:25:41,559 deer urine 471 00:25:41,559 --> 00:25:45,259 which is 472 00:25:45,259 --> 00:25:47,979 a different kind of drug 473 00:25:47,979 --> 00:25:49,059 what does it do 474 00:25:49,059 --> 00:25:56,399 I don't know 475 00:25:56,399 --> 00:25:57,079 I don't know 476 00:25:57,079 --> 00:25:59,899 people love it 477 00:25:59,899 --> 00:26:00,359 oh 478 00:26:00,359 --> 00:26:01,839 I've never heard of that 479 00:26:01,839 --> 00:26:03,219 I've heard of all the other drugs 480 00:26:03,219 --> 00:26:13,259 sorry this is so hard on you well i didn't want to be the one to have to tell you 481 00:26:13,259 --> 00:26:18,139 but haven't you ever noticed i mean isn't it a little weird when you go to visit his grave 482 00:26:18,139 --> 00:26:23,179 that there's just a line of people there waiting to visit with i thought you were gonna say a line 483 00:26:23,179 --> 00:26:29,899 of deer paying their respects and deer yeah just like pissing all over the grave and what are you 484 00:26:29,899 --> 00:26:39,519 thing happened to Bambi's mom no yep the Harkins Horker got him she he told her if you don't pay 485 00:26:39,519 --> 00:26:49,239 I slay and like grandpa like grandson because now you're doing the same thing with water 486 00:26:49,239 --> 00:26:54,659 for our listeners listeners pay yeah you pay you heard what my family is like you heard what we'll 487 00:26:54,659 --> 00:27:01,619 do you had known francis was a harkins orker descendant oh if anyone's interested in some 488 00:27:01,619 --> 00:27:09,199 dear urine i guess we know that's he's got a whole mausoleum too that's full of it full of it 489 00:27:09,199 --> 00:27:16,079 it's like that scene in the shining but it's deer piss yep wow thanks for um ruining my life i'm so 490 00:27:16,079 --> 00:27:26,859 sorry it's uh it's okay i still i still love him he to be do he did say before dying in the hail of 491 00:27:26,859 --> 00:27:36,519 bullets that he'd grown used to you if that makes you feel any better uh no no that's i think as 492 00:27:36,519 --> 00:27:40,479 much as he was capable of yeah well it's weird because in life he would say i love you so 493 00:27:40,479 --> 00:27:44,799 So it's strange that he would tell someone else he'd grown used to me. 494 00:27:45,819 --> 00:27:47,979 But hey, thanks. 495 00:27:48,419 --> 00:27:49,119 I'm sorry. 496 00:27:49,519 --> 00:27:52,419 Well, what can I say? 497 00:27:53,259 --> 00:27:54,239 Grandpa's a monster. 498 00:27:55,079 --> 00:27:56,059 Oh, that's a good close. 499 00:27:56,319 --> 00:27:56,759 Thank you. 500 00:27:59,019 --> 00:28:06,139 Francis, if you're still, I mean, if you're not reeling too much from that revelation. 501 00:28:06,899 --> 00:28:07,379 I'm okay. 502 00:28:07,799 --> 00:28:08,339 Are you sure? 503 00:28:09,259 --> 00:28:09,699 Yeah. 504 00:28:10,479 --> 00:28:17,879 okay well then i think i think it's time for our final segment the big quest big question 505 00:28:17,879 --> 00:28:27,459 the question is very big okay i have a big question for you francis okay i'll do my best 506 00:28:27,459 --> 00:28:34,419 my whole world was just i know i'm really sorry and this is actually kind of perfect um 507 00:28:34,419 --> 00:28:36,819 my question to you 508 00:28:36,819 --> 00:28:38,699 if you could be 509 00:28:38,699 --> 00:28:40,139 reincarnated 510 00:28:40,139 --> 00:28:42,199 not as a living being 511 00:28:42,199 --> 00:28:44,939 but as a physical object 512 00:28:44,939 --> 00:28:46,179 of any kind 513 00:28:46,179 --> 00:28:48,599 what would you be and why 514 00:28:48,599 --> 00:28:50,939 oh okay I have to be a physical object 515 00:28:50,939 --> 00:28:52,539 yeah it can't be like an animal 516 00:28:52,539 --> 00:29:03,728 you can be like I be a bird and soar through the sky and visit loved ones no it got to be like a physical object I wouldn visit loved ones but okay Well not anymore Not after what I know I know 517 00:29:04,428 --> 00:29:05,328 Grandpa's a monster. 518 00:29:05,588 --> 00:29:07,188 So this is a tough question because... 519 00:29:07,188 --> 00:29:08,228 You'd come back as a deer. 520 00:29:08,968 --> 00:29:09,928 Peeing all over the grave. 521 00:29:10,228 --> 00:29:10,908 You like that, Grandpa? 522 00:29:11,268 --> 00:29:12,568 But they just hear like animal noises. 523 00:29:12,988 --> 00:29:13,208 Yep. 524 00:29:14,388 --> 00:29:16,008 I think this one has rabies. 525 00:29:18,068 --> 00:29:20,008 If I have to be a physical object... 526 00:29:20,008 --> 00:29:20,248 Yep. 527 00:29:20,588 --> 00:29:22,288 This is tricky because I don't want to be thrown away. 528 00:29:23,008 --> 00:29:23,708 Oh, yeah. 529 00:29:23,708 --> 00:29:27,008 So I want to be something that has value. 530 00:29:27,248 --> 00:29:27,488 Yep. 531 00:29:30,368 --> 00:29:38,408 And also, I'm thinking that maybe like a jewel because no one's ever going to throw away a jewel. 532 00:29:39,928 --> 00:29:46,128 And so much goes into like making them or cutting them or whatever. 533 00:29:46,788 --> 00:29:48,308 Like the Lego work's got to be intense on those. 534 00:29:48,388 --> 00:29:48,928 So I'm thinking. 535 00:29:48,928 --> 00:29:55,628 but jewels often get kind of put away for and only brought out on very special occasions. 536 00:29:56,008 --> 00:29:59,828 So you'd be in a drawer in the safe for much of the time. 537 00:30:00,368 --> 00:30:01,808 Oh, and I want to be out in the world. 538 00:30:02,088 --> 00:30:02,308 Yeah. 539 00:30:02,808 --> 00:30:04,108 I want to be out in the world. 540 00:30:04,208 --> 00:30:04,888 An object. 541 00:30:05,508 --> 00:30:05,808 Yeah. 542 00:30:05,948 --> 00:30:06,468 An object. 543 00:30:06,828 --> 00:30:07,288 You know what? 544 00:30:07,348 --> 00:30:16,128 This might be a little stupid, but if I was water, I would never go anywhere. 545 00:30:17,348 --> 00:30:18,868 Certainly not in our listeners now. 546 00:30:18,928 --> 00:30:20,808 Oh, no, no, no. 547 00:30:20,868 --> 00:30:21,008 No. 548 00:30:21,588 --> 00:30:21,868 Yeah. 549 00:30:22,428 --> 00:30:23,148 Oh, my God. 550 00:30:23,168 --> 00:30:26,228 If you went into Elycer's Mouse for free, Francis, I would kill you. 551 00:30:26,468 --> 00:30:27,068 I wouldn't. 552 00:30:27,568 --> 00:30:28,008 Okay, good. 553 00:30:28,728 --> 00:30:28,988 All right. 554 00:30:29,128 --> 00:30:29,768 Well, right to kill? 555 00:30:29,948 --> 00:30:31,288 I just accepted that. 556 00:30:31,348 --> 00:30:32,048 I'm like, yes. 557 00:30:33,028 --> 00:30:35,628 That's how serious I am about being paid for all the water. 558 00:30:35,708 --> 00:30:36,348 No, you're right. 559 00:30:36,548 --> 00:30:37,448 I give it away. 560 00:30:38,448 --> 00:30:38,648 Yeah. 561 00:30:39,328 --> 00:30:40,388 You just give it away. 562 00:30:40,508 --> 00:30:41,528 But you see what I'm going for, right? 563 00:30:41,748 --> 00:30:42,008 Yes. 564 00:30:42,008 --> 00:30:48,268 Because I heard, I don't know if this is true, all the water that's on Earth, it's like been here. 565 00:30:48,928 --> 00:30:55,768 it's seen it all i mean like it's like you drink it and then you pee it out and then it goes into 566 00:30:55,768 --> 00:31:03,188 the sewer and gets treated or it gets evaporated out like all the water molecules like i'm immortal 567 00:31:03,188 --> 00:31:08,588 would you worry that you'd spend a lot of your time in sewers or inside oh no inside of people 568 00:31:08,588 --> 00:31:15,228 yes now yeah so i can't be water yeah i don't know if water counts as an object 569 00:31:15,228 --> 00:31:17,048 I'll allow water. 570 00:31:17,228 --> 00:31:20,688 If you freeze it, it's ice and that's an object, right? 571 00:31:21,488 --> 00:31:22,048 Right. 572 00:31:22,388 --> 00:31:30,228 If you get your shark toes, your shark foot, that's ice on the end of that. 573 00:31:30,788 --> 00:31:37,008 Go to friendslikeuspod.com to get your shark toes or your foot shark or whatever we ended up naming it. 574 00:31:37,028 --> 00:31:37,948 That was a great product, Pimp. 575 00:31:38,228 --> 00:31:38,408 Yep. 576 00:31:38,788 --> 00:31:39,308 Thank you. 577 00:31:40,268 --> 00:31:40,708 Wait, wait, wait. 578 00:31:41,108 --> 00:31:41,968 A gun. 579 00:31:42,828 --> 00:31:43,208 Ooh. 580 00:31:43,208 --> 00:31:45,508 I cost money 581 00:31:45,508 --> 00:31:47,868 I'm dangerous 582 00:31:47,868 --> 00:31:49,528 I'm sexy 583 00:31:49,528 --> 00:31:52,868 but what if I'm used for a really gross crime 584 00:31:52,868 --> 00:31:53,608 you know 585 00:31:53,608 --> 00:31:55,168 that's the only thing 586 00:31:55,168 --> 00:31:57,528 I'm not one of those fun cool gun crimes 587 00:31:57,528 --> 00:31:58,068 yeah 588 00:31:58,068 --> 00:32:02,408 a t-shirt cannon's a fun one 589 00:32:02,408 --> 00:32:03,968 I don't know how long they last though 590 00:32:03,968 --> 00:32:05,388 I don't want to end up in a landfill 591 00:32:05,388 --> 00:32:06,148 I don't want to be forgotten 592 00:32:06,148 --> 00:32:08,628 I know everything's 593 00:32:08,628 --> 00:32:09,348 that's the thing 594 00:32:09,348 --> 00:32:10,768 everything's gonna be 595 00:32:10,768 --> 00:32:12,388 how about a meteorite 596 00:32:12,388 --> 00:32:16,228 you're just flying through space and then you land on earth yeah and i'm very valuable 597 00:32:16,228 --> 00:32:25,008 what happens wait art this is gonna prove my own stupidity um how what are there meteorites 598 00:32:25,008 --> 00:32:32,108 on earth that are places yeah there's like a meteorite like in a lab somewhere or in a museum 599 00:32:32,108 --> 00:32:39,568 or something well this is gonna prove my ignorance but i don't know i'm glad we're proving our 600 00:32:39,568 --> 00:32:45,068 ignorance both of us have just proved our ignorance i guess i'm picturing like a joe dirt type like 601 00:32:45,068 --> 00:32:51,668 thing giant thing that fell out of the sky you know in joe dirt yes yeah and then it turned out 602 00:32:51,668 --> 00:32:58,408 to not be but he thought it was a meteorite are there things like that that aren't meteorites 603 00:32:58,408 --> 00:33:02,328 that are meteorites yeah yeah meteorites that's why we have the word i'm pretty sure well i mean 604 00:33:02,328 --> 00:33:07,248 i know that but but they come to earth and then now they're on earth it's a meteor yeah and then 605 00:33:07,248 --> 00:33:13,168 it hits and it's a meteorite is what i've been but they hit earth yeah okay hit it hard yeah 606 00:33:13,168 --> 00:33:16,868 pound earth they're also known as earth pounders 607 00:33:16,868 --> 00:33:22,428 that's the fun name that's a cool name yeah or terra slam 608 00:33:22,428 --> 00:33:29,688 terra slams um okay so you'd want to be a meteorite yeah because i'm making impact 609 00:33:29,688 --> 00:33:40,488 okay do you have a uh well i didn't have one in general i just i had the question but i didn't 610 00:33:40,488 --> 00:33:48,368 have my own but hearing you talk it out i would want to be the iceberg that sunk the titanic 611 00:33:48,368 --> 00:33:54,288 because then i get to have this dramatic impact on society and it wasn't your fault 612 00:33:54,288 --> 00:34:00,988 wasn't my fault it was some idiot captain's fault uh i was right ahead and they just rammed right 613 00:34:00,988 --> 00:34:07,168 into me but then i'm still water so i'm still part of like you're still here circle of life yeah 614 00:34:07,168 --> 00:34:12,848 yeah and i'm thinking that water is probably still hanging out in the same place that it was or it's 615 00:34:12,848 --> 00:34:18,428 going from sky to ocean ocean to sky back and forth so no no no sewer risk no being stuck in 616 00:34:18,428 --> 00:34:24,988 someone's body risk oh interesting that's i mean i'm jealous but i get to have a cultural impact 617 00:34:24,988 --> 00:34:29,108 i don't know how i'm going to be reincarnated into the past but i'll figure that out i'm gonna 618 00:34:29,108 --> 00:34:38,228 find a way to hit you as the meteor right not like breaking character and announcing my plan 619 00:34:38,228 --> 00:34:42,848 to hurt my co-host no no i imagined you as a meteor hitting me yeah then we'd be together 620 00:34:43,528 --> 00:34:44,688 Oh, I'd like that. 621 00:34:44,868 --> 00:34:45,028 Yeah. 622 00:34:45,848 --> 00:34:48,068 Maybe the two of us could sink the Titanic. 623 00:34:48,948 --> 00:34:50,648 Go back in time and... 624 00:34:50,648 --> 00:34:52,168 Oh, you thought the iceberg was bad? 625 00:34:52,608 --> 00:34:53,428 Oh, yeah. 626 00:34:53,568 --> 00:34:55,448 Way to get a load of this. 627 00:34:55,568 --> 00:34:56,268 Jenna hits it in the front. 628 00:34:56,768 --> 00:34:58,188 It's in the back. 629 00:35:00,788 --> 00:35:01,188 Yep. 630 00:35:02,828 --> 00:35:04,408 Oh, that's what really happened to the Titanic. 631 00:35:04,888 --> 00:35:05,048 Yeah. 632 00:35:07,108 --> 00:35:10,088 Spoiler alert for the next Crumpets with Churchill. 633 00:35:10,948 --> 00:35:11,948 That's what really happened. 634 00:35:11,948 --> 00:35:13,928 Yeah, got meteorite horked. 635 00:35:16,768 --> 00:35:20,688 I think we both came up with probably the two best possible answers. 636 00:35:20,888 --> 00:35:21,248 Of course. 637 00:35:21,908 --> 00:35:26,948 Good luck, listeners, trying to trump those answers. 638 00:35:28,388 --> 00:35:31,668 Well, that wraps up the big question. 639 00:35:32,268 --> 00:35:32,948 The big question. 640 00:35:33,488 --> 00:35:33,768 Okay. 641 00:35:34,308 --> 00:35:35,548 There's only one final thing. 642 00:35:35,548 --> 00:35:36,028 Yeah. 643 00:35:38,108 --> 00:35:38,668 Francis. 644 00:35:39,048 --> 00:35:39,288 Yeah. 645 00:35:39,288 --> 00:35:51,348 did you say your secret word i did thanks for noticing uh okay i did you i did okay at the 646 00:35:51,348 --> 00:35:57,048 beginning or what uh i think during invention of the week okay you did not have to give that away 647 00:35:57,048 --> 00:36:03,528 but you did thanks you're welcome okay so you're still not gonna guess i don't think you don't 648 00:36:03,528 --> 00:36:11,068 think i don't think so do you have a guest let me ponder you what's your guess well i thought i had 649 00:36:11,068 --> 00:36:17,868 a guess but then i forgot to write it down so i don't remember what it is so i'm gonna go i think 650 00:36:17,868 --> 00:36:24,468 meteor might be my guess you're wrong no i would have loved it if you just made that you're really 651 00:36:24,468 --> 00:36:28,388 like that was your answer oh that would have been smart yeah i wish i'd done that but then i would 652 00:36:28,388 --> 00:36:38,608 to lose i woulda lose okay so you don't win okay and now my guess is because it was during invention 653 00:36:38,608 --> 00:36:50,608 of the week we were talking about haircuts and robots i'm gonna say it is haircut wait no i always 654 00:36:50,608 --> 00:36:59,708 doing this again continuing your trend of thinking my secret word is a word you said first i do this 655 00:36:59,708 --> 00:37:07,188 every time i can't believe it i cannot believe it my word was not haircut no um i'm gonna say 656 00:37:07,188 --> 00:37:13,088 i don't even know if you've said this skill i don't know if i said it either but that's not 657 00:37:13,088 --> 00:37:19,728 my word okay shoot all right well i'm ready for the big reveal my word was vouching wow you were 658 00:37:19,728 --> 00:37:25,048 smooth with that yeah slipped it in and i meant it though if any executives from sky mall are 659 00:37:25,048 --> 00:37:33,268 looking for a new inventor i'm vouching for francis damn yeah wow i would never would have got that 660 00:37:33,268 --> 00:37:39,908 i don't know what yours is though when did you say yours well um at the very end i said my word 661 00:37:39,908 --> 00:37:45,128 which is legwork really yeah i have don't you just said it i have no memory of this yeah i said it 662 00:37:45,128 --> 00:37:45,668 toward the end. 663 00:37:46,848 --> 00:37:48,908 There's a lot of legwork that goes into 664 00:37:48,908 --> 00:37:50,908 making a jewel. 665 00:37:51,308 --> 00:37:52,988 Oh, a lot of legwork that goes into 666 00:37:52,988 --> 00:37:53,768 making a jewel. 667 00:37:55,028 --> 00:37:56,468 So no points to you. 668 00:37:56,708 --> 00:37:57,488 And no points to me. 669 00:37:59,948 --> 00:38:00,428 Someday. 670 00:38:00,708 --> 00:38:01,348 Fart noise. 671 00:38:02,308 --> 00:38:04,808 And then we'll laugh forever and be kicked out of the pod. 672 00:38:06,608 --> 00:38:07,748 Thanks for everything. 673 00:38:08,648 --> 00:38:08,888 Yeah. 674 00:38:09,208 --> 00:38:09,628 Thanks. 675 00:38:10,148 --> 00:38:11,248 Thanks for the memories. 676 00:38:11,468 --> 00:38:11,788 Of course. 677 00:38:13,268 --> 00:38:13,548 All right. 678 00:38:13,548 --> 00:38:15,868 Well, I think that's it, listeners. 679 00:38:16,328 --> 00:38:16,528 Yep. 680 00:38:20,488 --> 00:38:22,088 Bye.