1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:25,740
all right welcome to very fine friends bonus improv yeah bonus oh my god show us your improv

2
00:00:25,740 --> 00:00:31,680
yes let me take a picture of your improv uh joe can we get a suggestion please

3
00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:43,120
your suggestion is overpaid overpaid overpaid not us am i right no we're yeah we're under

4
00:00:43,120 --> 00:00:52,780
yeah show us the money but a lot of people are a lot of ceos i feel i don't even i here's the

5
00:00:52,780 --> 00:00:56,940
I don't even have a problem necessarily with the way some CEOs are paid.

6
00:00:57,040 --> 00:00:59,780
Because it's like, you're in charge of everything in a company.

7
00:00:59,780 --> 00:01:00,700
If it's a big company.

8
00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:04,960
Like, I can understand, you know, like, making a lot of money doing that.

9
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:06,060
Yeah, but no golden parachute then.

10
00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:13,720
Like, if you do bad and you have to be, like, removed, a lot of them leave with, like, a big package.

11
00:01:13,880 --> 00:01:20,740
I mean, if you screw up, I think, yeah, you should not get to then also take $20 million with you when you leave.

12
00:01:20,740 --> 00:01:26,460
But like, I think if you, I think CEOs do bring value, like a good CEO does bring value

13
00:01:26,460 --> 00:01:27,020
to a company.

14
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:30,380
I think there's a lot of mid-level people that are overpaid.

15
00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:39,220
And like, once you, like, once you get into the workforce, like, I remember being like,

16
00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:45,200
you know, in my early twenties and like, you know, being like 20, basically having, when

17
00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:50,400
I had my first office job and it was like, oh, I just assumed everyone was competent.

18
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:54,560
And then you're like, oh, no, most of them are not, in fact.

19
00:01:55,440 --> 00:02:00,940
And they're in charge and people respect them somehow and they don't know how to do anything.

20
00:02:01,980 --> 00:02:06,380
Yeah, I think that's a universal experience once you get into the workforce.

21
00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:08,140
Yeah, I certainly noticed that, too.

22
00:02:08,900 --> 00:02:10,220
And it's kind of like.

23
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:12,520
Almost like the emperor's.

24
00:02:12,700 --> 00:02:14,000
What's that story?

25
00:02:14,180 --> 00:02:14,720
Emperor's naked.

26
00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:15,680
New clothes.

27
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:15,940
Yeah.

28
00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:17,880
I must have heard a different version.

29
00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:19,580
No, no, the emperor's naked.

30
00:02:19,580 --> 00:02:20,260
That's what it was.

31
00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:20,560
Yeah.

32
00:02:20,740 --> 00:02:21,320
But it's like,

33
00:02:21,420 --> 00:02:22,480
other people are just like applauding.

34
00:02:22,640 --> 00:02:23,340
Like, yes, yes.

35
00:02:23,340 --> 00:02:23,860
Like applauding.

36
00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:24,300
And I'm watching.

37
00:02:24,380 --> 00:02:25,460
I'm like, this is horrible.

38
00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:26,120
Yep.

39
00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:28,160
This man don't know nothing.

40
00:02:28,820 --> 00:02:29,000
Yeah.

41
00:02:29,980 --> 00:02:31,760
Don't give Gina a promotion

42
00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:33,040
just because she said

43
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:36,040
that we should be more efficient

44
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:36,800
with our shipping.

45
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:37,640
Oh, that's brilliant.

46
00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:38,920
Yeah, that's not brilliant.

47
00:02:39,220 --> 00:02:40,300
Gina, Gina.

48
00:02:41,540 --> 00:02:42,760
Can I tell you the most weird,

49
00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,800
the weirdest thing I ever did

50
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:45,400
were like,

51
00:02:46,180 --> 00:02:47,600
so when I was working at this,

52
00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:49,040
I like made my department

53
00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:49,660
way more efficient

54
00:02:49,660 --> 00:02:54,040
and I was the only one in my department because it was night shift like data processing and I like

55
00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:58,500
streamlined so many things that I had some down like a lot of downtime yeah so one night I was

56
00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:03,360
carrying in this was years and years ago like a tv with like you know those tvs I had a built-in

57
00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:15,405
vhs yeah so I was like bringing it into my office because I was gonna like plug it in and watch tv and one of the managers was like what the hell is this Like as I carrying it like it a TV It like what are you doing with it I like I gonna watch it

58
00:03:17,445 --> 00:03:24,185
Hey maybe go put it back in my car. You didn't like that? No. I'm like well punish me then for

59
00:03:24,185 --> 00:03:34,145
being so good. Yeah. Yeah it's another monitor. Plays thrift store VHSs for

60
00:03:34,145 --> 00:03:34,625
work.

61
00:03:38,565 --> 00:03:40,145
I have to watch the movie

62
00:03:40,145 --> 00:03:41,425
Clifford for work.

63
00:03:42,305 --> 00:03:43,345
Clifford Files.

64
00:03:44,485 --> 00:03:46,205
And you'd be like, no, no, no, I'm using it to

65
00:03:46,205 --> 00:03:48,165
watch how-to VHS tapes on

66
00:03:48,165 --> 00:03:49,325
how to do this job.

67
00:03:49,925 --> 00:03:52,245
Which I thought of that. I was just embarrassed to be caught.

68
00:03:53,645 --> 00:03:55,665
And now, improv.

69
00:04:01,805 --> 00:04:03,125
Uh, Dennis,

70
00:04:03,125 --> 00:04:13,445
can you come in here please yep what's up mr howard um dennis can you please explain um

71
00:04:13,445 --> 00:04:22,845
what this bouncy castle is doing in your your office yes mr howard i can

72
00:04:22,845 --> 00:04:30,985
the top shelves are increasingly hard to reach and due to my fear of ladders i thought hey

73
00:04:31,645 --> 00:04:33,865
What'll get me up there and back down?

74
00:04:34,805 --> 00:04:35,385
Bouncy house.

75
00:04:36,065 --> 00:04:36,505
Don't worry.

76
00:04:36,625 --> 00:04:37,505
I got a great deal on it.

77
00:04:38,005 --> 00:04:38,685
Oh, wow.

78
00:04:38,825 --> 00:04:41,765
Dennis, that's really, really smart of you.

79
00:04:41,905 --> 00:04:43,565
That's why we pay you the big bucks.

80
00:04:44,125 --> 00:04:44,525
You know what?

81
00:04:44,865 --> 00:04:45,725
I like that idea.

82
00:04:46,025 --> 00:04:46,265
Yeah?

83
00:04:46,565 --> 00:04:46,845
Yeah.

84
00:04:46,965 --> 00:04:48,205
Mr. Howard, wow.

85
00:04:48,205 --> 00:04:52,965
I'm going to install bouncy houses in everybody's office from now on.

86
00:04:53,025 --> 00:04:53,905
Oh, this is such an honor.

87
00:04:54,165 --> 00:04:54,545
It's finally.

88
00:04:54,805 --> 00:04:58,445
I've always wondered, why do we put shelves so high?

89
00:04:58,565 --> 00:04:59,685
They're so high.

90
00:04:59,685 --> 00:05:01,825
not everyone's tall Mr. Howard

91
00:05:01,825 --> 00:05:03,825
we are but not everyone

92
00:05:03,825 --> 00:05:06,225
uh I

93
00:05:06,225 --> 00:05:09,325
but now it leads me to my next question

94
00:05:09,325 --> 00:05:11,185
I can't see I can't wait to see

95
00:05:11,185 --> 00:05:13,225
where this innovation goes

96
00:05:13,225 --> 00:05:17,605
what's with the slip and slide down the hallway

97
00:05:17,605 --> 00:05:20,565
oh Mr. Howard I should think that was obvious

98
00:05:20,565 --> 00:05:23,525
um you know how the employees have been complaining

99
00:05:23,525 --> 00:05:27,325
that um that their 30 minute lunch is is not long enough

100
00:05:27,325 --> 00:05:28,705
oh yeah

101
00:05:28,705 --> 00:05:32,845
Because the building's so big, you know, it takes them like five minutes to get to the lunchroom.

102
00:05:33,345 --> 00:05:34,805
Not with the slip and slide.

103
00:05:36,725 --> 00:05:39,745
So people would just be slipping and sliding straight into the lunchroom?

104
00:05:39,905 --> 00:05:40,145
Yeah.

105
00:05:40,365 --> 00:05:42,205
It cuts down travel time by three minutes.

106
00:05:43,045 --> 00:05:47,625
So in a way, it's like I gave them an extra three minutes in their lunch.

107
00:05:47,685 --> 00:05:50,045
You are a magnanimous boss, Mr. Howard.

108
00:05:50,865 --> 00:05:51,605
God bless you.

109
00:05:52,205 --> 00:05:53,905
Dennis, I like the cut of your jib.

110
00:05:54,145 --> 00:05:55,525
I cut it for you, Mr. Howard.

111
00:05:58,705 --> 00:06:07,925
can i run my next thought by you please please do you're a non-stop good idea machine well you

112
00:06:07,925 --> 00:06:26,511
know how there so many papers in a filing cabinet i do know that you know how they have those inventions for kids that a sticky hand where you thwap it and it sticks to something Yeah I thought what if we give everyone these sticky hands And this way they don even have to cross the room to get the files out of the filing cabinet

113
00:06:26,831 --> 00:06:30,171
My God, it would be like having a ten foot long arm.

114
00:06:30,411 --> 00:06:31,471
Exactly, Mr. Howard.

115
00:06:31,951 --> 00:06:32,311
Oh.

116
00:06:33,851 --> 00:06:37,811
Dennis, I don't know what I did in a previous life.

117
00:06:38,671 --> 00:06:41,191
What I did right that brought you to me.

118
00:06:41,191 --> 00:06:43,551
What you've done in this life, sir, has been enough.

119
00:06:45,471 --> 00:06:48,591
Dennis, would it be weird if I kissed you gently on the forehead?

120
00:06:49,131 --> 00:06:50,051
Not at all, Mr. Howard.

121
00:06:50,751 --> 00:06:54,271
I frankly thought I was going to have to go a lot farther to get ahead here.

122
00:06:55,931 --> 00:06:57,051
I'm ready for my promotion.

123
00:06:58,231 --> 00:06:58,371
Oh.

124
00:06:59,291 --> 00:07:00,391
Thank you, Mr. Howard.

125
00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:02,771
Oh, is that Copenhagen?

126
00:07:04,071 --> 00:07:04,711
That's right.

127
00:07:05,731 --> 00:07:07,731
I used to be a skull man, but not anymore.

128
00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:10,631
Now just Copenhagen.

129
00:07:11,191 --> 00:07:14,631
Thank you. I'm ready to move up.

130
00:07:15,291 --> 00:07:23,931
Good. I'm putting you in charge of the daycare center here at work.

131
00:07:24,251 --> 00:07:25,931
It's actually a promotion, believe it or not.

132
00:07:26,031 --> 00:07:27,571
Thank you, Mr. Howard. I won't let you down.

133
00:07:31,931 --> 00:07:32,991
Cut to the daycare.

134
00:07:36,571 --> 00:07:37,771
Hey, Marsha.

135
00:07:38,551 --> 00:07:38,991
Yes?

136
00:07:41,191 --> 00:07:43,151
I don't know what happened since I got promoted.

137
00:07:44,151 --> 00:07:45,231
I'm struggling.

138
00:07:45,411 --> 00:07:46,871
I'm struggling to come up with a good idea.

139
00:07:48,151 --> 00:07:51,951
Well, I gotta be honest with you.

140
00:07:53,051 --> 00:07:58,031
When you installed a fax machine here in the daycare center

141
00:07:58,031 --> 00:08:02,291
as a way to help feed the children,

142
00:08:02,631 --> 00:08:05,651
it didn't quite make sense.

143
00:08:06,971 --> 00:08:07,851
And, uh...

144
00:08:07,851 --> 00:08:09,111
No, that can't be right.

145
00:08:09,111 --> 00:08:11,391
when you

146
00:08:11,391 --> 00:08:13,991
when you said we should stop

147
00:08:13,991 --> 00:08:16,311
stop using

148
00:08:16,311 --> 00:08:18,111
disposable diapers and just take

149
00:08:18,111 --> 00:08:20,151
staplers and staple all the

150
00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:20,991
diapers together

151
00:08:20,991 --> 00:08:23,751
a lot of babies got cut

152
00:08:23,751 --> 00:08:27,651
I'm going to be honest

153
00:08:27,651 --> 00:08:28,671
I don't think

154
00:08:28,671 --> 00:08:32,531
I don't think your ideas

155
00:08:32,531 --> 00:08:34,251
of bringing office supplies

156
00:08:34,251 --> 00:08:36,331
into a non-office environment

157
00:08:36,331 --> 00:08:37,691
are working quite the same way

158
00:08:37,691 --> 00:08:43,431
your ideas of bringing fun, childish things into an office environment did.

159
00:08:46,911 --> 00:08:49,251
That reminds me of a new invention I have for the babies.

160
00:08:50,311 --> 00:08:55,151
Okay, I guess you get one more shot before I let Mr. Howard know this isn't working.

161
00:08:57,111 --> 00:08:58,671
Don't worry about me and Mr. Howard.

162
00:09:01,591 --> 00:09:05,591
But I was thinking, you know how some of these kids can't swim?

163
00:09:05,591 --> 00:09:11,231
I'd say a right side of them, I'd say almost all of them can't swim.

164
00:09:11,231 --> 00:09:11,731
Yeah.

165
00:09:11,731 --> 00:09:15,031
Um, I have a new productivity for the daycare center.

166
00:09:15,031 --> 00:09:16,031
Okay.

167
00:09:16,031 --> 00:09:33,996
It a pool and at the bottom of the pool is a little trampoline And from now on you just be lifting up the babies and chucking them as hard as you can to the bottom of the pool They will bounce out It will teach them confidence and swimming

168
00:09:36,176 --> 00:09:36,596
Yes.

169
00:09:37,396 --> 00:09:38,436
My God, Dennis.

170
00:09:39,416 --> 00:09:40,216
You've done it.

171
00:09:40,876 --> 00:09:42,496
This is going to solve multiple problems.

172
00:09:42,936 --> 00:09:47,836
First, we promised the parents that we would teach their kids to swim for some reason.

173
00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:49,676
I don't know why we promised that.

174
00:09:49,676 --> 00:09:54,476
also i have this weird compulsion where i'm constantly throwing the babies towards the ground

175
00:09:54,476 --> 00:09:58,836
i noticed that i five s'd it and five wide it

176
00:09:58,836 --> 00:10:04,856
you're you're you're gonna go far with me um i'm just gonna go talk to mr howard

177
00:10:04,856 --> 00:10:16,896
cut to mr howard um i i think we have to let marcia go um oh oh she's a bad idea machine i

178
00:10:16,896 --> 00:10:17,816
I saw her throwing a baby.

179
00:10:18,496 --> 00:10:18,996
I said,

180
00:10:19,316 --> 00:10:20,416
I said,

181
00:10:20,516 --> 00:10:20,976
Marsha.

182
00:10:21,316 --> 00:10:21,836
I said,

183
00:10:21,876 --> 00:10:22,576
what are you doing?

184
00:10:23,676 --> 00:10:24,316
So wait,

185
00:10:24,356 --> 00:10:25,956
what was she throwing the baby into?

186
00:10:27,036 --> 00:10:28,156
A pool of water,

187
00:10:28,336 --> 00:10:28,536
sir.

188
00:10:30,016 --> 00:10:30,636
With a,

189
00:10:31,176 --> 00:10:32,596
it pains me to say this,

190
00:10:33,096 --> 00:10:34,116
a trampoline at the bottom.

191
00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:35,436
What do you think of that?

192
00:10:36,856 --> 00:10:46,436
That sounds actually like a lot of fun and a great way to teach babies confidence and swimming all at the same time.

193
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,376
get Marsha in here

194
00:10:49,376 --> 00:10:50,516
oh okay

195
00:10:50,516 --> 00:10:52,356
it sounds like she's become

196
00:10:52,356 --> 00:10:54,376
you've rubbed off on her she's now

197
00:10:54,376 --> 00:10:55,636
the good idea machine

198
00:10:55,636 --> 00:10:58,756
come here you

199
00:10:58,756 --> 00:11:00,376
Mr. Howard come here

200
00:11:00,376 --> 00:11:02,116
yes come here oh

201
00:11:02,116 --> 00:11:04,336
you've been working out Mr. Howard

202
00:11:04,336 --> 00:11:07,016
Mr. Howard

203
00:11:07,016 --> 00:11:09,996
yeah oh

204
00:11:09,996 --> 00:11:11,796
we don't need to bring Marsha into this

205
00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:13,016
oh your hair

206
00:11:13,016 --> 00:11:14,756
I'ma comb it

207
00:11:14,756 --> 00:11:16,496
oh that's better

208
00:11:16,496 --> 00:11:21,616
that that feels really nice mr howard oh i i always part it on the other side it actually

209
00:11:21,616 --> 00:11:26,576
looks pretty good this oh my god who is this 20 year younger man let me put on some music

210
00:11:26,576 --> 00:11:37,216
mr howard yes we don't need to bring marcia into this we just need each other

211
00:11:37,216 --> 00:11:46,396
was that okay you've reciprocated my forehead kiss

212
00:11:46,396 --> 00:11:48,536
wait wait

213
00:11:48,536 --> 00:11:49,916
let's

214
00:11:49,916 --> 00:11:52,016
let's put our foreheads together

215
00:11:52,016 --> 00:11:52,896
now it's like

216
00:11:52,896 --> 00:11:54,536
it's like our respective kisses

217
00:11:54,536 --> 00:11:55,756
are kissing each other

218
00:11:55,756 --> 00:11:59,216
Mr. Howard

219
00:11:59,216 --> 00:12:02,116
I've never felt like this

220
00:12:02,116 --> 00:12:03,076
in the workplace

221
00:12:03,076 --> 00:12:07,336
I just got a really good idea

222
00:12:07,336 --> 00:12:09,256
what is it?

223
00:12:11,116 --> 00:12:11,496
let's

224
00:12:11,496 --> 00:12:13,076
let's make this

225
00:12:13,076 --> 00:12:14,356
bouncy castle

226
00:12:14,356 --> 00:12:16,976
a bed

227
00:12:16,976 --> 00:12:20,456
alright team