okay what's your impression i have an impression so far it's the only one i can do okay i'm
I want to have you guess who it is.
Okay.
I am poos in boots.
Shrek.
I think it's really good.
That's not bad.
I am poos in boots.
i i it was like i was there in the movie yeah i was on call standby case antonio
stopped wanting to act thank god he didn't though why just because i don't want antonio
to ever stop acting oh yeah i know me too isn't it weird that he's not with katherine zeta jones
oh you mean because they were in the zoro movie together yeah yeah do you think all actors that
are in movies together are married i think they should be okay because when like as a consumer
as someone who like watches the movie when you are really into it and you buy it it's like i
love them together i want this to be real and you hate that it's not real
yeah not in like a fanatic lunatic kind of way not in like a way where i have i have figurines
of katherine zeta jones and antonio banderas and i i make them kiss at night and they have them
i get they get to kiss at night and uh and uh they discuss grocery lists and um oh no did
antonio pay the water bill uh yeah no no i don't do any of that no you mean either
i wonder if they have um figurines of catherine zeta jones you think they sell those i think
we should start we should start i hope they do she's hot yeah she's hot yeah she's welsh
what she's welsh wow she got me i thought she was i did know that actually she was
from the land of Zoro.
She was Zoroastrian?
Zoroastrian?
Yeah.
I was going to say Zoranese,
but I like yours better.
Wait, Zoroastrian,
that's a religion?
Is that...
Like an ancient religion.
Yeah, that's what you are then.
You're a Zoroastrian
because you love Zoro so much?
Zoraphile.
Wait, no!
No, we already know.
We don't want to tag file
under the end of the word.
Yeah.
uh you're uh yeah you just you love zorro yeah and i love puss in boots
welcome to friends like us the podcast where friends talk about stuff francis well i know
how well you are because you could do a spot on puss in boots impression going to hollywood
yep that's all i'm gonna say to anyone look out hollywood here he comes
oh this just in they do sell figurines oh we looked it up okay thank you our producer joe
has just shown us a i don't know kind of a disturbing figurine of katherine zeta jones
i it does not look without a good likeness yeah but it does exist so that was the question that's
what we that answered our question thank you big plastics big plastics thank you
um all right uh oh did you have you had something you wanted to tell me about oh when okay if you're
gonna say it like that now it's gonna sound like i i need therapy when i tell you this story
this is a safe space francis okay you mean it yeah oh wait before you tell the story yeah
uh every week as regular listeners know we get secret words from our producers
to say secretly and the other person has to try and thank you uh the other person i'm just glad
i remembered to to talk about it um the other person has to see if they can guess at the end
of the episode what the secret word is and we are getting points that will accumulate right up into
the moment of our death and then we find out who wins um but anyway we have our secret words
and now here's joe with the secret words jenna's secret word is entity francis's secret word is
earlobe back to the podcast back to your story francis yes your therapeutic story yeah so this
is i'm listening i'm taking notes okay well i had um as i was thinking about stuff to say earlier
a memory popped into my head and i realize now this is abuse oh but it happened to me
so it's okay then so we can talk about it oh okay yeah and um so i don't know if you know this but i
was a fat child um after i was normal and then i hit a point where i was fat and then like i just
kept doing that it's my thing um but so there came a point where like people would make comments to my
dad not like like that were horrible like that i would hear him like but like they'd be like
you know dennis it's this is it's up to you buddy like he's what are you gonna do so i would every
once in a be like okay we're gonna we're gonna do something about this but i was like complaining
because i was like embarrassed to like work out in front of other people so like i got like a
doctor's note to not do sports from like a friend of the family so on the one hand no physical
Collectivity.
Yeah.
It gets to a point where I was like, we got to do something.
We got to do something.
And this is what he came up with.
He bought a vinyl sweatsuit for me.
And I was a child.
Like, maybe 13?
Yeah.
12, 13.
He gives me a vinyl sweatsuit to put on.
And we used to live in front of a big park.
It was like an acre all the way around.
And he goes, you're going to jog in the sweatsuit.
and I'm going to
stay here and watch you.
So he had binoculars
and he sent me to go jogging
in a sweatsuit around the park
and would watch me
to make sure I didn't stop.
So I was like, yeah.
I'm like, I don't run.
So I'm just like, God.
But I just wondered,
imagine you're at the park
and this
plastic child
runs by you.
And then you see in the distance a man with binoculars watching.
I would call the cops, I think.
No one ever called the cops.
And I wouldn't know why.
I would just be like, something's happening here that should not be happening.
Sweatsuits work.
Not to make you lose weight, but to make you sweat.
They're aptly named.
Yeah.
They got to run the lawsuit on that.
we didn't say anything about losing weight
no they didn't
yeah anyway now you know
alright
well
good
glad I don't have to say anything therapeutic
about that
I think I found the sweatsuit
like years ago
it was just like a moment of like
like no
no
yeah
so is vinyl traumatic for you now?
yeah I just
I only listen to cassettes
yeah smart
yeah
you know who really could have helped?
Puss
Puss in what?
Boots
what kind of boots?
it was the material
is that ever established?
oh no you're going for vinyl
no they're leather
I'm leaving
no Puss is a classy cat
They're leather boots.
They're leather.
Probably calfskin.
But for him, it's a cow because he's small and a calf is big enough to look like a cow.
I think the calf is age-related, not size-related.
It's still a calf because it's a baby.
No.
It's size-related.
Oh, I was wrong.
Relative from the person looking at it.
Yep.
Oh, my bad.
Yep.
My brain is fried from all the sweating.
That's okay.
I understand.
I forgive you.
Thank you.
Okay.
Well, on that note, let's move on to our first segment, which is, as always, the invention
of the week.
Inventions.
Hi.
Francis, what do you got for me?
Okay.
This is really cool.
All right.
Well, all of them have been pretty cool.
No, this is like, you ever feel lonely?
probably not really i have in my life i know what you're talking about okay yeah you got a lot going
on yeah i would say that was a dumb question i asked you because you don't seem lonely at all
thank you i think no it's okay yeah well other people do okay
and uh sometimes it's hard to make friends you know because you go out you try talking to people
they seem okay then they say like you could be two weeks in then they make one comment you're like
Yeah, never mind.
I don't want to see you anymore.
Wouldn't you like to avoid that?
Yes.
Okay, well then you're going to love this.
I'm all prepped to love it now.
Prepped to love.
The invention is, it's an account you make online.
and you
you fill out a profile
and you answer a lot of questions.
I love questions. Don't you?
Sure. Yeah, like doing
surveys about yourself. Yeah. Love that.
That's why I miss MySpace, by the way.
Anyway,
you
I miss Tom.
Yeah.
He's, yeah.
He's just looking over his shoulder all the time.
Yeah.
He's, he's alive, I bet.
I'm, I hope so.
Tom, you're a listener.
Uh, drop a line in the comments.
Let us know what you're up to.
Yeah.
Tomsdontdie.com.
I'm pretty sure I saw that.
Yeah.
Anyway.
Um, so, and other people are doing this too.
Okay.
Here's where it gets cool.
Okay.
you wear a necklace
or a bracelet
or a ring
depending on what you like
okay
when you're out in the world
and you come around someone
who is a
a match to you
based on your interest
or your personality
or whatever
and you're near them
the devices
vibrate
or make noise
and you know you're around someone
who could be a great friend
so
let me say
Just make sure that so it's not it's not like like Tinder or whatever.
I don't know how those apps really work where it's like proximity location based.
And you you do actually kind of put those things in there.
And you do maybe have like interests and stuff in there.
And then it matches you that way.
You want to be like in real life.
Yeah, this is this device just stores like like you have something that says like, I love the movie.
death becomes or uh and then somebody else that has that movie is one of their loves like
it'll be like bing bing well it's more than that okay it's not just one thing when you're near
someone who is like they just a match and if it a friend it could be like one thing and if it like maybe a romantic match it could like glow red But the point is it not just one movie
It's, like, Jenna and Francis both love 90s action comedies starring Geena Davis.
And we're walking around near each other, and our devices are going to be like,
and we're going to know, like, we're around.
um
they need to go find the person
yes
I guess
well at first I was thinking
you
that would be annoying
if you're just like
uh
like
like I'm just
trying to go to the grocery store
I'm not trying to make a friend
right now
but then I guess you wouldn't have
you don't wear it
or you can turn it off
okay
because it's probably fashionable
and you might like to have it on
so it's a good looking device anyway
it's handsome yeah
how many questions
have you already thought of the questions
because the types of questions are really important too.
Yeah, it's a combination of everything.
It's like your music interests, your movie interests,
your philosophies, your personal beliefs, everything.
And you mentioned Tinder, I believe.
Yeah.
So that to me is like very surface level.
Like you might answer a couple of questions about yourself,
but it's more of like just icebreaker stuff.
So those questions wouldn't be enough.
okay yeah this is like this account knows you okay does it can you like constantly be refining
your likes and like adding more and more to it yeah yeah okay new questions just dropped
okay get online i do think this would be pretty popular yeah i do i do think this would be quite
popular i don't know that how the tech would work how it would kind of like how close he would have
to be to somebody for it to work also yeah what would you do if like you went someplace and it
just like went off like crazy like like like the people that go to comic-con they all seem they
don't need to know yeah i mean that would be like things those things would be going nuts right well
it's like for big events yeah also if you're going to comic-con that would be too much because it's
like how do i know who am i but then maybe the minute the devices get if you're like hey and
you're pointing yourself and they're like hey they're pointing themselves and you get close
maybe when the device is super close it could be like so we have to know like for sure there's a
way to confirm it's like yeah it's you yeah okay do you foresee predators use i guess predators
use everything um we'll have a no we'll we'll put a checkbox on our website are you a predator yeah
you can't come in it's like the i like are you a robot thing yeah and if somebody's a predators
to their credit predators really answer those questions honestly honest honest group it's yeah
yeah maybe we could be like are you a predator and then in parentheses like just be honest
and then if they check it we send them a device that doesn't work
and they there's just never a match for them oh yeah predators if you're listening and we know you
are uh just be cool yeah don't use this to be a predator okay yeah stop scaring people at night
in their homes or during the day don't also stop getting in the back of people's cars and then when
they drive away they don't know you're in the back seat and then you you jump out and surprise
them stop doing that thank you for renewing my knee-jerk reaction to always look okay yeah yeah
but it's good to still be safe
but I just warned all the predators so you
shouldn't have to worry about that anymore.
That's true. And also who's going to predate me?
Who's predating you?
Yeah. I would predate you.
I would predate you.
We'll do it at night because I don't really get scared in the daytime.
I'm going to change that. I'm going to make you scared
all the time. You promise? Yeah.
Sugar crush!
so i don't understand to agree i also think this invention will be widely popular but i don't
understand how it's related to the problem that you introduced at the beginning where you're like
so your point is that when you do match with someone you can like see all the stuff about
their profile so that would prevent you from being in the situation of like you're friends
with them for like a couple weeks and then they say something and you're like i don't want to be
friends with you anymore no because our questions are so in depth that all the people that you would
because you could put on there is this a deal breaker yes so you're never gonna you're never
gonna bling with someone who's like a deal breaker for you on anything that you really don't like
and let's say you want to see a new movie that's coming out and they said they wanted to see the
new movie that's coming out you might get a thing on your phone that says boop you and your match
both are available right now and you both want to see this movie should i get tickets
can you filter it so you only match based on certain things if you're like oh i only want to
match with you like like that yeah like i'm going to see this movie but i want to go with
absolutely but then part of this problem is the loneliness thing so now do you just have to go to
a densely populated area just start like walking by as many people as possible just be like match
somebody match with me well we we advise against calling that out vocally oh okay yeah so
match somebody match
holding up a sign yeah
stand near me
oh but I'm not a predator don't worry
oh I guess
the audience can't see me shushing my lips
yeah I think they felt it
yeah
okay
I do think
I would wonder how close you would have to be
to somebody and it would have to be ubiquitous
enough that enough people are wearing
them that
let's just be real the jewelry's for fun your phone can do it too yeah that's true yeah um
but sometimes sometimes you want a little jewelry merch is cool yeah yeah and i like i like too that
it's a multiple of of jewelry you could pick the kind of jewelry that you want yeah honestly the
type of jewelry that you want it's another way to yeah that's another way to match like if a dude's
walking around with a pinky ring will match me up you know you'd love my dad no no dennis has a
pinky ring yeah wow um or if it someone has an anklet again i say no
do you think an anklet can be sexy
no
maybe at the beach
I tend towards trashy
with anklets not sexy
what if it's clearly brand new they got it for their beach vacation
what if it's on my
ankle what if you haven't looked down
at my ankles today and you're about to feel real stupid
oh my
god it's so
I'm going to the beach
the levels of sexy
okay what is this invention called
I don't know
I'm thinking something with like
like
homeo
like Romeo
yeah like homeo and Juliet or something
it's like friends or lovers
what is what about like homeostasis
though oh oh I thought you were
suggesting it and I was like yes
but like homeo what is
like homies like or like homie in like homing in
homeo homey in yeah homey closer
but is it homeo spelled like romeo or is it spelled like homey like i always think of homey
like as in like buddy yeah that's what i was going for h-o-m-i-e yeah oh maybe yeah like hyphen
know okay homeo kind of does make it sound like a gay dating app yeah bye gays
yeah yeah or just you're gonna get a ton ton of new gay friends yeah i'd like i just like
of homing in on your homies,
you know?
Or buds.
Bud.
Laser.
Bud day.
Bud day?
Yeah, like it's your buddy day.
Bud day?
Yeah.
No, no, no.
Oh, okay.
No.
Nope.
I was thinking like it's like
it's the day of the bud
with your buddy.
Bud day.
But you ruined it.
I don't think I ruined it.
I think Bidet's ruined it.
You called out the flaws.
Pal around.
Pal around?
Yeah.
Pal around?
We're palling around, but there's a pal around.
Oh.
You're palling around, but there is a pal around.
Pal around.
Yeah, pal around.
I like it.
Good job, Joe.
Yes.
All right.
Well, I think that if you got enough people to adopt this, I do actually think this would be a good, like, I think this would, uh, shockingly.
I don't know what you mean.
Uh, this is a good idea.
Um, wow.
Well, listeners, you heard it here first.
Uh, predators do not steal the paleroom.
Yeah, we don't want it tainted with you.
Yeah.
Get in on it after it's popular.
Or get on it and then realize, I don't have to be a predator.
I can just be a nice person.
Yeah.
You're never too...
I heard this the other day.
I thought it was so beautiful.
You never...
Oh, shoot.
You're never too much of a predator to stop being a predator.
Yeah, it's close enough.
Oh, that's beautiful.
Yeah.
I want that on a pillow.
Yeah.
Predators, you hear that?
You could be prey.
Just be prey.
Yeah.
Be like the rest of us.
How do you know you don't like it?
Yeah.
you I honestly I love being just prey yeah wait for someone to get in your car do you think we
should make a horror movie called eat prey love like a horror version of the movie eat prey love
now I do okay and if we both have that on our profile ding ding I know that would be a really
that would be like a crazy that would be like soulmate level if you put something that specific
and you're like deal breaker and then and then you're walking around like no one's ever gonna
match with me and then somebody matches with you you have to then it would be like i i've gotta see
yeah that's like sex in the plaza level i don't know what that means it means no matter where you
are you like oh it's on yeah get in the fountain with me okay but then but but it's also just for
friends and we're not it's not necessarily for dating right but soulmate i kind of don't you
you would want to
have sex with your soulmate, right?
Probably.
I would
you'd probably at least try it.
For sure.
Oh no.
Well, thanks for investing.
Yeah, pal around.
That title just came to me.
It was brilliant.
It was inspired, Francis.
Go to friendslikeuspod.com
Invest.
and the pal around.
Except for predators.
But then predators have cured you also.
So you're now no longer a predator.
We're conflicted.
All right.
Good job.
And I'm excited to see this questionnaire.
I think that's the big thing.
That'll be the...
That's how you...
That's how you really got to refine this tech.
I'll start working on it tonight.
Okay, cool.
Good.
And then listeners,
if you have questions
that you think should be included in this questionnaire for the pal around then please email us friendslikeusofficial at gmail and then we include your questions in the questionnaire
I think that does it for the invention of the week.
All right.
It's time for our next segment
called Take It or Believe It.
Listen up, honey.
you can either take it or believe it.
In this section, in this segment,
I don't know why I just call it a section.
You were raised in the orchestra.
Oh, that's true.
I am an orchestra child.
I'm a feral orchestra child.
You were the pigeon lady from Home Alone 2,
looking down into the...
But I'm Benjamin Buttoning,
so I'm getting younger.
Yes.
So that's why, that's how come I,
that was me when I was just a little kid.
That makes that sadder.
that I was homeless above the orchestra section.
All right.
So then this segment is,
it's similar to like a two truths and a lie,
except we're going to do two lies and a truth here.
Francis and I are each going to give three strange but true facts.
And we have to see if the other person can guess
which one is the actual true fact.
So two of them will be fake.
One of them will be real.
And we have to see if we can guess
the other person's real fact.
No hard feelings, okay?
No, I'm going to take this real personal.
Take it hard?
Oh, yeah.
I'm going to take this real personal.
Yeah.
Okay.
Hard.
How are we doing this?
What?
Do we want to just...
um what's i'll i'll do all my facts just do them right in a row you can either guess right away or
ruminate on no yeah yeah i'll do all mine we'll do mine first and then we'll do yours okay um okay
my first fact for you king charles the now king charles formerly prince charles
he's actually a classically trained puppeteer oh like for real like uh he
like with like marionettes like could do it pro style he just doesn't ever i mean we never get to
see that from him but he's a classically trained puppeteer that's fact number one oh i just want
to say right now i thought these were supposed to be all about us but oh so i love i love this
It's going to be a fun little twist.
All right, then.
We know that Jonah Bloom-Lights is King Chuck.
Sir?
Yeah.
King Chuck?
Yeah, that's me.
I'm King Charles.
Hey.
Nice puppets.
Fact number two.
The Statue of Liberty has actually gained weight since 1886, I think, is when it was
given to the United States or when it was unveiled, whatever.
I'm not including the year. You just guessed as part of that.
Okay. It's not a guess, actually. It is 1886.
It was originally
223 tons, so that's about
446,000 pounds.
It is now about
450,000 pounds, so about 225 tons.
But over time, things have built up, and the expansion of the metal, also from being in
the sun, has caused it to gain weight.
A statue of liberty.
That's what happened to me, too.
Like a good American has gotten fatter as she's gotten older.
That sounds so plausible, yet it was so long.
That's fact number two.
Okay.
Uh, fact number three, you could actually hallucinate if you have too much nutmeg.
Uh, okay.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Um, yeah.
That's probably why they always tell you just a sprinkle of nutmeg.
But anyway.
Okay.
Thank you for all those.
So.
Okay.
Are you going to tell me right after?
Um, yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know. We'll see how I feel after you guess.
Okay. I love that.
My prediction is that the Statue of Liberty has, in fact, gotten heavier.
That's what you think is the truth.
Okay.
Yeah. No, no, no. Yes.
I'm not trying to sway your decision. I'm just clarifying.
You're saying that's the truth. That's the true statement.
No. I think the truth is you can hallucinate on too much nutmeg.
right okay god i'm glad this is not like in the underworld and this is like
my one way in into the underworld like into like the good part party town i thought the underworld
was hell i'm gonna make it my own okay hey it's only hell if uh you're having a bad time
yeah i'm gonna be pissed if king charles is i was gonna say you're not even considering no
I am it's just so ridiculous it could be true
but
you know that I would think that
you know that I would think that was too ridiculous
to be true maybe it's true
maybe that's what him and Camilla
were doing yeah
the old
the old puppet master
yeah
let me just
sigh
I think you can hallucinate on too much
much nutmeg okay that's your final guess yeah that is correct i did it you did it i did it i
really i was so happy when you said the statue of liberty thing i shouldn't have let you keep talking
i should just take it that as your final answer no this is it sounded real though right it does
and the statue of liberty actually does weigh 225 pounds or tons rather and um it was 1886 that it
was brought over 200 and how much 25 tons 450 000 is it like evenly dispersed or is it like she oh
she wears it well yeah like good for you girl like those something about the the draping on
those robes really does right because the robes look heavy the fingers are big yeah nice hips
she's got birth and hips yeah she got perfect nose does she yeah i actually can't picture her
nose. Yeah, it's a perfectly defined nose.
It'd be really funny if they gave us a statue with like a big
crooked nose or like
one big nostril.
Yeah, or like a deformed earlobe
or something. Yeah, that'd be really funny.
Are her earlobes
attached? I was just wondering that.
I guess we'll never know.
Well, we could. Let's go. Let's go right now.
Yeah. And we're back.
They're not attached. Wow, she's gorgeous.
That was amazing. What a bod.
Alright, well, I guess
it's... You know how I feel about people in sandals, though.
yep just goes to toast well thanks i won you yeah well i well we could maybe tie yeah we could tie
okay now these are all about me okay i like that even better yep all right because now i'm really
gonna be learning something she has detached yeah detached earlobes yes which we know because we
were just there we just paused the podcast here's a picture oh beautiful look how happy we are yeah
smiling with a hot dog okay so here's my three truths okay
truth one yes when i was a kid um
my you had a vital track what if i use that yeah i hope they forgot um no when i was a kid at my
dad's like pizza place there was this guy that like worked for him or with him or whatever and
it was like Halloween time and I really liked him and I didn't want him to go.
So, um, I handcuffed us together and he couldn't go to his Halloween party and we had to walk
down the street to a locksmith and have it taken off.
Okay.
All right.
I'm storing that one away.
Okay.
That's one.
Okay.
Uh, story two.
One time when we were in Rocky Point and I was younger, I was running around the beach
and it was a very rocky beach.
Ooh.
Again, aptly named.
Oh, I didn't even think of that.
Yeah.
Wow.
And I was running and I tripped and I fell down really hard.
And one of the like lava, like it's like how the rock is.
Yeah.
It like hit me right in the middle of the stomach.
And I was like.
And I couldn't breathe.
And I couldn't think.
And I thought I was going to die for like 10 minutes.
Yeah.
Okay.
That was tough.
Or was it?
and this one
I feel like I can
no I'll use this one
sigh
my dad's friend
married someone
who
we used to go visit
like
people that they knew
on like the Indian Reservation
and one time
we were out in the woods
on the reservation
and
we found
a dead body
the end
okay
so which one of those is true
okay I
I could see you handcuffing yourself to somebody
that seems like something you would do
I feel like the dead body story would have had more to it
you want to ask a question?
a follow up question?
yeah go ahead
male or female
we don't know
it was wrapped in cloth
how do you know
it was dead
and not just a
sleepy guy
um
I'm too young
to remember that detail
I can just tell you that
they were of the
mind your own business
philosophy
and we just
got the hell out
like they didn't report it
oh
which now I'm like
oh you probably should have
hmm
but I was a child
and I feel like
I can't get in trouble
and what was your initial reaction to that finding that dead body
i was scared as a kid i wanted to get out of the woods i don't like the woods
okay this all right i i'm gonna i gotta go rocky point uh i apologize for a second
okay oh i messed up what'd you do these are all true
I just realized I don't have a fake lie.
You were supposed to have two lies.
Two lies?
Oh, no.
Shoot.
Well, I guess we can also call this segment,
learn it a little more about Francis.
So I was right.
You did handcaff yourself to somebody.
That didn't feel like something that you would do.
But the dead body thing is real too?
Yeah.
That sounds so fake.
Oh, how did you?
Wow.
Oh my God.
Wow.
yeah it was a bloody wrapped
human shaped thing in the woods
whoa
that's wild
that is crazy
yeah
I'm
hope I'm allowed to talk about it
I can't believe I
I did it all wrong
oh man
I didn't have
I supposed to have two lies
two of them were supposed to be lies
remember how we just did it
just now
I am Puss Okay Puss where In boots Okay All right well you redeemed yourself
Damn.
All right, well, that's interesting to know.
I guess...
Okay, how about...
You can't give us a lie now.
No, I was just going to say, guess which one hurt the most.
the rocky point one you're good yep the one where you thought you were gonna die i can't believe i
did this i'm sorry you guys that has been take it or believe it
and i think with francis we're all believing it oh it's all true that's so embarrassing that's
alright. You can
redeem yourself right now
with the big
question.
The question is very big.
Okay.
I have a big question
for you. Okay. Can you handle it?
No.
We'll see. Okay, we'll see.
My question is,
if you
were
put in a time travel machine and
sent back to like a long time ago.
Let's say like medieval or Renaissance times.
This is like a long time ago.
How would you convince other people that you were from the future?
And let me just say that when you got beamed back into time,
your glasses didn't come, you were bald because I don't want them to be like,
she has modern hair, you know, so you're bald.
I'm bald?
Or just peasant-y looking.
okay
I don't get the bald actually might
work in my favor
people are bald
baldness is eternal
how many women are more bald
oh
you're right
okay so your hair just
matches times
um
okay
that would be tough because anything you'd say would they'd start accusing you of being a witch
um yeah so i asked and what how do i appear like how how is my presence
like i'm this new entity in their lives how am i suddenly like explained to them i just appear
for all they know you walked from the next town over your big claim is you're from the future
okay that's true um okay i see yeah that you would like normally you'd say you want to
predict things but you can't really predict like like old man johnson's cow's gonna
he's gonna stop making milk um i i don't know how i'd do it uh you've stumped me on this one
because you could if you tried to explain technology it would you really can't i mean
most people can't most people don't understand technology enough yeah i mean i couldn't really
explain most of it right now but i guess um somebody get me a potato and two wires
maybe if you just started like in
yeah maybe if you just started inventing things like right then oh my god are you from the future
Is that what the Adventures of the Week are about?
Thank you for finally noticing.
But if you just start inventing things like, hey, you know.
Like what, though?
Like, I don't know.
Indoor plumbing would be nice.
But could you really invent indoor plumbing?
Because what if you told them about it and they were like, that's just a good idea.
It's not necessarily proof of anything.
Which?
But if you were coming up with a whole bunch of really good ideas.
If you were a nonstop good idea machine.
you're like an old-fashioned ben franklin then people respect you but future
um yeah i don't know if you could people would just think you were crazy or a witch
so maybe you have a theory well i can say like maybe let's say it was like if it was specific to
like if you went back around a period of time where something big was happening and you could
help? Yeah.
Okay. Like, if it was during the time of, like, the Black Plague...
But again, how would I help?
You could be like, it's not the
cats, it's the rats.
Did they think it was cats?
My social studies teacher told us that.
Do you think that was a take it or believe it situation?
Well, if I was a teacher, it would have been true.
Yeah.
um but yeah he said that they thought it was the cats that were spreading it so they like
killed all the cats they could find and then they had even more rats because there was no cats
idiots yeah they deserve to die but the cats are the the people in the black plague yeah but that's
my point is if it's something like that where you can be like i know about this you know people are
like, you know, using leeches, you can be like, nah.
Like scientific principles.
Yeah.
But that's a tight rope to walk because someone's like, you know, which.
Which.
Yeah.
You start using science.
You get to be.
But I also don't like what would be a cure.
There's no, there wasn't like a cure for them.
So like, how do you, if you were, you were like, just trust me, this is the way to make
people better.
That would be one thing.
No, just giving information.
yeah it's from like a high point away from everyone it's not the cats you're wearing one
of those masks with like a really long nose like the bird beak nose masks yeah plague doctors yeah
yeah um so we don't really have a good answer to this um i think there's got to be something you
could like okay when people are like cowering in fear because of an eclipse you could be like
actually
we learn in the future that it's because of
this
well didn't they like try and
kill people that said that
specifically we told you not to
talk about the eclipse
but they did kill people that were like
actually the earth revolves around the sun
not the other way
around and you
yeah Galileo me and Galileo
would be having a real fun time in prison
together
I think this was a very hard ask
Yeah.
I agree.
If you could just write down and pass this down to every generation of your family that Amazon and Google and Apple is going to be huge.
Yeah.
You don't have to understand it now.
Just write down the word apple and pass it down.
We already have apples.
No, just trust me.
It's an apple you can't eat.
Yeah, because I can't explain any invention myself either.
Yeah.
So I should learn how to explain the technology of something so that when I go back to the past.
Also, I would be fine if they burned me as a witch.
No.
Yes, because...
Fire hurts.
Okay, but that...
The medieval times sound so terrible to me.
I would not want to live there.
Again, I feel like it smells.
Everything smells.
People probably have shit all over themselves.
Like, I don't know.
Yeah.
Don't yuck their yum, okay?
I was...
How am I yucking their yum?
You're going to go back in time and be like,
Ew, shit!
But they're like, mmm, yum.
It's fashionable.
I love my shit.
I put that on my coat.
I wasn't covered in shit.
I do it on purpose.
This is for Mr. Johnson's milkless cow.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, I guess we don't have a good answer to this big question.
So let me get this straight.
I've ruined the segment and I stumped on the question.
Well, it's, I think it's a good thought experiment and it might be something we can revisit.
We can reopen the big question.
If we figure out a way later or listeners, if you have a surefire way, let us know.
You are obsessed with fire.
Statue of Liberty had fire when we were there.
Yeah, she still has it.
She still has it.
She loves fire.
We were going to steal it, but we didn't.
Pyro, babe.
Yeah, if you have a solution to this problem, email us at friendslikeusofficial at gmail.com
or leave us a comment on any, whatever your favorite social media platform is.
Across all of them, we are at flu pod official.
That's F-L-U-P-O-D official.
Anywhere on social media.
um i guess we'll wrap one last thing to do wrap up the secret word oh wait let's real quick we're
wrapping up the big question oh the big question okay now it's wrapped so yeah secret words did
you say yours i did and you i did you did i did well you you did it smooth so did you i have one
guess oh shoot oh okay is your word eternal no okay i thought you were gonna get it for sure
because I feel like I was really hamming mine in.
Is your word dead body in the forest?
Is your word?
Why don't you understand the segment?
No, my word is earlobe.
Oh, and then we made a whole thing about our earlobes.
We did.
It couldn't have worked out better for me.
So you did say earlobes, which my word was earlobe.
Does that count as an extra point?
Yeah, I want to give it to you.
I also want to give it to you because I totally forgot that you were with earlobe
you got me to say the word wow yeah that's true joe three points joe said it too wow wait three
points because one because he said it wait wait we don't get a point for saying our own secret word
saying it and you didn't guess it yeah oh we get points for saying it and not guess okay i was just
assuming we only got points when we guessed yeah what are you from the future oh okay so yes and
then you got not only me to say it but you got joe to say it too wow yeah i'm pretty good big day
for francis huge terrible with the segments fantastic with the secret word point rich
all right do you have a guess for me uh yeah is it puppets no oh that would have been cool
oh yeah no i i actually just like talking about puppets is your word nutmeg no
you think i had my secret fact written out before my secret it's true i i am crafty like that
i'm not a predator but i am crafty like that it's not predator i saw your eyes light up
i know i thought you were getting sorry i don't know it then entity it was my word i thought you
were gonna get it because i did not do a very elegant job when we were in the last in the big
question i said so i just like this entity that shows up in the in the past and they don't wonder
i kind of stop trusting you so much i know that's the problem we're okay all right well
i got one point francis got three dang thanks everyone that was a huge success for you i am
Puss in boots.
I'm losing it.
It's getting worse every time.
I'm pussing boots.
All right.
Well, that's it for this episode of Friends Like Us.
Thanks for listening.
Bye.