1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:21,700
welcome to friends like us bonus improv joe can we please get a suggestion

2
00:00:22,700 --> 00:00:23,360
Sure can.

3
00:00:23,720 --> 00:00:25,940
Your suggestion is stepson.

4
00:00:27,060 --> 00:00:28,160
Oh, stepson.

5
00:00:29,240 --> 00:00:30,640
I don't have one of those.

6
00:00:31,220 --> 00:00:32,180
Neither do I.

7
00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:33,380
We're like twins.

8
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:34,380
We are.

9
00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:35,940
That's what twins are.

10
00:00:35,940 --> 00:00:40,760
Do you have the same kinds of children?

11
00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:43,560
Where does the term come from?

12
00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:44,040
Step.

13
00:00:45,220 --> 00:00:48,140
Because you're a step away from being real family.

14
00:00:48,300 --> 00:00:48,980
Don't come for me.

15
00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:50,580
I'm not.

16
00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:50,860
No.

17
00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:51,440
Okay.

18
00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:54,660
You know, like you're a step away from it being real.

19
00:00:54,940 --> 00:00:55,840
Ah, that sounds bad.

20
00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:56,280
I know.

21
00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:56,620
You know what I mean.

22
00:00:56,660 --> 00:00:57,180
I know what you mean.

23
00:00:57,320 --> 00:00:57,820
I know what you mean.

24
00:00:58,040 --> 00:00:58,320
Blood.

25
00:00:59,020 --> 00:00:59,260
Yeah.

26
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:00,300
Organ worthy.

27
00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:01,660
Hmm.

28
00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:03,400
You're not organ worthy.

29
00:01:03,860 --> 00:01:05,000
You may not.

30
00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:06,200
Steps.

31
00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:07,620
I always wanted a twin.

32
00:01:08,460 --> 00:01:09,080
No, that's not true.

33
00:01:09,340 --> 00:01:11,820
I wanted to find twins.

34
00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:13,940
You're not a twin?

35
00:01:13,940 --> 00:01:15,500
You just want to see twins in the wild?

36
00:01:15,860 --> 00:01:18,300
I want to, like, be with twins.

37
00:01:19,700 --> 00:01:20,420
As friends.

38
00:01:21,700 --> 00:01:24,040
Oh, okay. You want to be friends with twins?

39
00:01:24,180 --> 00:01:24,300
Yeah.

40
00:01:25,740 --> 00:01:30,500
In high school, I was friends with two girls that were identical twins.

41
00:01:31,500 --> 00:01:44,320
And I found out later from a different friend of mine that after high school, one of them got a tattoo of some kind of Chinese character or something like that.

42
00:01:44,320 --> 00:01:48,060
But that meant a beautiful and unique soul.

43
00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:51,560
We were just like, you know that's not true.

44
00:01:51,700 --> 00:01:53,780
Well, her soul could still be unique.

45
00:01:54,540 --> 00:01:57,380
Whatever it was, it was like beautiful and unique woman or whatever.

46
00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:58,880
It's like, you are definitely not that.

47
00:01:59,080 --> 00:02:01,600
There's literally a corrupt copy of you.

48
00:02:03,140 --> 00:02:05,980
And that also made me think, well, it makes me think,

49
00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:09,040
you know when people say, you're one in a million, right?

50
00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:11,980
That's not really a compliment.

51
00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:14,000
No, there's a lot more than a million people.

52
00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:14,880
Yeah, exactly.

53
00:02:15,260 --> 00:02:18,820
It's like, oh, they're saying there's like 8,000 other people

54
00:02:18,820 --> 00:02:21,380
that are exactly like you, right?

55
00:02:21,380 --> 00:02:30,540
is that math right i don't know could be 350 in america yeah so at least 350 yeah so if if you're

56
00:02:30,540 --> 00:02:44,834
one in a million there at least 350 million or 350 people in the united states that are just like you okay if the math doesn stop now I leaving Well anyway Yeah I was like oh great

57
00:02:45,414 --> 00:02:47,154
There's just a ton of people like me then.

58
00:02:47,414 --> 00:02:49,414
Did the other twin go out and get a tattoo that matched?

59
00:02:49,934 --> 00:02:50,734
That would be hilarious.

60
00:02:51,314 --> 00:02:52,374
They weren't that funny.

61
00:02:52,954 --> 00:02:53,714
Oh, too bad.

62
00:02:53,774 --> 00:02:54,754
That would have been, yeah.

63
00:02:55,474 --> 00:02:56,074
Too bad.

64
00:02:56,214 --> 00:02:57,794
They were sweet girls, but not that bright.

65
00:02:59,194 --> 00:03:00,934
Well, that's the kind of girl I'd want to be.

66
00:03:01,434 --> 00:03:02,254
Sweet, but not bright?

67
00:03:02,534 --> 00:03:02,754
Yeah.

68
00:03:02,874 --> 00:03:03,974
How about sweet and bright?

69
00:03:04,974 --> 00:03:06,434
That's too much work.

70
00:03:07,394 --> 00:03:08,094
Pick one.

71
00:03:08,674 --> 00:03:09,354
I guess it's true.

72
00:03:09,414 --> 00:03:10,934
The more you know, the less sweet you get.

73
00:03:11,414 --> 00:03:12,454
Isn't that the truth?

74
00:03:13,514 --> 00:03:15,594
And now, improv.

75
00:03:21,634 --> 00:03:22,114
Mom?

76
00:03:22,814 --> 00:03:23,154
Yeah?

77
00:03:24,454 --> 00:03:25,754
Today was a hard day.

78
00:03:26,354 --> 00:03:27,374
I'm sorry, honey.

79
00:03:27,654 --> 00:03:28,414
Tell me about it.

80
00:03:28,614 --> 00:03:29,514
I just...

81
00:03:29,514 --> 00:03:31,374
I learned more about the world.

82
00:03:31,374 --> 00:03:35,554
And it's starting to feel like it's bad.

83
00:03:37,074 --> 00:03:39,334
Oh, honey, what did I tell you about learning?

84
00:03:40,314 --> 00:03:40,994
I know.

85
00:03:41,134 --> 00:03:44,454
It's just hard to ignore them when they talk at school.

86
00:03:45,714 --> 00:03:46,154
Teachers?

87
00:03:46,694 --> 00:03:47,174
Yeah.

88
00:03:47,554 --> 00:03:47,874
Yeah.

89
00:03:49,434 --> 00:03:50,694
Well, I learned it.

90
00:03:50,734 --> 00:03:51,574
I can't unlearn it.

91
00:03:51,914 --> 00:03:53,394
I don't even know if I could go on now.

92
00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:54,474
What's the point?

93
00:03:55,014 --> 00:03:59,334
Honey, that's not the sweet little kid that I raised.

94
00:04:00,154 --> 00:04:02,774
I know, I'm becoming more bright and less sweet.

95
00:04:03,794 --> 00:04:04,274
No.

96
00:04:04,654 --> 00:04:05,594
It's happening right now.

97
00:04:05,714 --> 00:04:09,074
No, let me remove some knowledge from you.

98
00:04:09,234 --> 00:04:09,594
How?

99
00:04:12,094 --> 00:04:13,834
Napoleon was a really great guy.

100
00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:14,814
What?

101
00:04:19,694 --> 00:04:23,614
America was discovered in 1912.

102
00:04:24,994 --> 00:04:26,554
I'm getting sweet again.

103
00:04:26,714 --> 00:04:27,934
Oh, thank goodness.

104
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:30,894
This is, I'm getting, how do we stop this from happening, Mom?

105
00:04:31,674 --> 00:04:32,534
I don't know.

106
00:04:32,534 --> 00:04:41,274
I, we, we might have to just, every time you're in school, maybe there's a counter teacher right there.

107
00:04:41,914 --> 00:04:42,514
A counter teacher?

108
00:04:42,734 --> 00:04:50,074
Someone that can just always kind of keep you with a certain amount of knowledge that keeps you sweet.

109
00:04:50,334 --> 00:04:50,634
Okay.

110
00:04:50,794 --> 00:04:52,274
But still able to function in this world.

111
00:04:52,394 --> 00:04:55,074
I hope so, because all I want to do is be.

112
00:04:57,374 --> 00:04:57,814
Sweet?

113
00:04:57,934 --> 00:04:58,574
Sweet and dumb.

114
00:04:59,394 --> 00:05:00,474
I want that too, honey.

115
00:05:01,054 --> 00:05:01,874
Thanks, Mom.

116
00:05:02,914 --> 00:05:03,774
Cut to school.

117
00:05:04,794 --> 00:05:05,134
Okay.

118
00:05:06,134 --> 00:05:24,448
And so as you can see the War of 1812 led to some serious repercussions across the whole globe Um I just like to chime in here Oh excuse me Who are you Uh mercenary teacher

119
00:05:25,968 --> 00:05:26,928
Mercenary teacher?

120
00:05:27,248 --> 00:05:27,908
Yes, thank you.

121
00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:28,428
This is my time.

122
00:05:28,468 --> 00:05:29,228
Reclaiming my time?

123
00:05:30,488 --> 00:05:33,528
Uh, no, there wasn't.

124
00:05:34,988 --> 00:05:36,468
And no, it didn't.

125
00:05:36,928 --> 00:05:37,588
Thank you.

126
00:05:38,908 --> 00:05:39,868
Kids, don't.

127
00:05:40,348 --> 00:05:41,268
Kids, you're looking.

128
00:05:41,568 --> 00:05:42,108
No, no.

129
00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:44,228
I can see you all looking slightly sweeter.

130
00:05:44,228 --> 00:05:46,908
Nope. Don't listen to that mercenary teacher.

131
00:05:48,068 --> 00:05:51,668
Nope. I want you, when you leave here, I want you angry at the world.

132
00:05:51,828 --> 00:05:53,468
That's how much knowledge I want you to have.

133
00:05:56,048 --> 00:05:59,068
Jenny, are you, Jenny, Jenny, are you okay?

134
00:05:59,948 --> 00:06:00,428
No.

135
00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:05,568
Something just happened to me.

136
00:06:07,328 --> 00:06:08,388
Jenny, what's happening?

137
00:06:08,628 --> 00:06:09,908
Oh, too educated.

138
00:06:10,568 --> 00:06:11,948
Oh, yes, that's right.

139
00:06:11,948 --> 00:06:14,328
Mad and sweet?

140
00:06:14,808 --> 00:06:15,628
Mad and sweet?

141
00:06:16,028 --> 00:06:18,048
No, that's a dichotomy.

142
00:06:18,168 --> 00:06:18,528
Something's happening.

143
00:06:18,908 --> 00:06:21,488
Learn the word dichotomy and come over to my side.

144
00:06:22,168 --> 00:06:24,028
I'd like to step in.

145
00:06:24,408 --> 00:06:25,748
Mercenary teacher again?

146
00:06:26,068 --> 00:06:27,308
There's no dichotomy.

147
00:06:28,088 --> 00:06:30,528
There's only...

148
00:06:30,528 --> 00:06:31,288
Deuteronomy.

149
00:06:33,208 --> 00:06:34,408
Mercenary teacher!

150
00:06:35,148 --> 00:06:37,088
What are you doing to my students?

151
00:06:39,568 --> 00:06:40,368
That's it.

152
00:06:40,368 --> 00:06:42,588
I've reached the apex of my education.

153
00:06:43,868 --> 00:06:44,468
No.

154
00:06:44,728 --> 00:06:45,088
Yes.

155
00:06:45,708 --> 00:06:47,468
You're in sixth grade.

156
00:06:47,768 --> 00:06:49,008
This can't be where it ends.

157
00:06:49,088 --> 00:06:49,688
I'm done.

158
00:06:50,548 --> 00:06:54,368
I'm getting my spindle drift.

159
00:06:55,068 --> 00:06:55,588
Spindle.

160
00:06:57,408 --> 00:06:58,008
Spindrift.

161
00:06:58,908 --> 00:06:59,828
My hobo bag.

162
00:07:00,548 --> 00:07:01,588
Your spindle.

163
00:07:01,928 --> 00:07:02,528
Your spindle.

164
00:07:02,528 --> 00:07:04,588
There's a little bit of knowledge I just was able to give you.

165
00:07:04,608 --> 00:07:05,588
More knowledge.

166
00:07:06,248 --> 00:07:07,528
I'm gone now.

167
00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:18,988
cut to 25 years later oh jenny uh oh hi uh this is um i'm so glad that we could have this date you

168
00:07:18,988 --> 00:07:27,748
you're so your your profile was so sweet you like that i i loved it anyway i thought maybe

169
00:07:27,748 --> 00:07:31,428
since you let me pick the restaurant and you'd be fine with wherever we went

170
00:07:31,428 --> 00:07:41,948
I wanted to go to a Cuisines of the World restaurant where we could just really learn about all kinds of new cuisines.

171
00:07:42,308 --> 00:07:42,388
Learn?

172
00:07:42,948 --> 00:07:43,308
Yeah.

173
00:07:43,788 --> 00:07:47,168
Like, I've never had Ethiopian food, but it looks like it'd be really good.

174
00:07:47,288 --> 00:07:47,388
Oh.

175
00:07:47,388 --> 00:07:47,908
And I wanted to try.

176
00:07:48,348 --> 00:08:04,942
So what I ordered for us in advance is the maitre d menu That the menu where you order something and every dish is something you never heard of and you learn a little bit about a country with every dish

177
00:08:04,942 --> 00:08:06,862
and a little bit about their

178
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:09,302
heritage. I can't.

179
00:08:09,982 --> 00:08:10,902
What? Jenny, why?

180
00:08:10,902 --> 00:08:14,002
I can't. I don't want to.

181
00:08:14,422 --> 00:08:14,862
Jenny, but

182
00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:17,062
you're so sweet.

183
00:08:17,222 --> 00:08:19,082
You said anything that I picked

184
00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:20,762
would be great. I respect you.

185
00:08:20,902 --> 00:08:22,642
I do. I love you.

186
00:08:22,642 --> 00:08:24,122
If you respect me, you would

187
00:08:24,122 --> 00:08:25,442
You love me?

188
00:08:26,162 --> 00:08:27,342
As a friend, yes.

189
00:08:27,742 --> 00:08:28,222
This...

190
00:08:28,222 --> 00:08:30,462
Whoa, this is...

191
00:08:30,462 --> 00:08:31,782
Jenny, this is moving kind of fast.

192
00:08:34,122 --> 00:08:36,362
Oh, good. Here comes the maitre d'.

193
00:08:36,362 --> 00:08:36,762
No.

194
00:08:40,082 --> 00:08:41,782
Oh, maitre d', yes. Hi.

195
00:08:44,122 --> 00:08:45,222
Oh, what was that?

196
00:08:46,022 --> 00:08:47,162
Oh, about Ethiopia?

197
00:08:47,342 --> 00:08:49,822
Oh, thank you for the food.

198
00:08:50,022 --> 00:08:51,722
I just learned so much.

199
00:08:51,722 --> 00:08:52,162
Bye.

200
00:08:52,862 --> 00:08:53,222
Jenny.

201
00:08:53,222 --> 00:08:54,842
Jenny what's happening to you?

202
00:08:54,842 --> 00:08:55,782
I don't know I'm

203
00:08:55,782 --> 00:08:58,422
Jenny?

204
00:08:59,622 --> 00:08:59,902
Is that

205
00:08:59,902 --> 00:09:03,362
Are you

206
00:09:03,362 --> 00:09:06,082
Why did your shirt just

207
00:09:06,082 --> 00:09:08,002
Rip off your shoulders

208
00:09:08,002 --> 00:09:09,662
And your body like that

209
00:09:09,662 --> 00:09:11,122
Hulk style

210
00:09:11,122 --> 00:09:12,222
I didn't do shit

211
00:09:12,222 --> 00:09:14,462
Did you say

212
00:09:14,462 --> 00:09:16,822
I didn't do shit

213
00:09:16,822 --> 00:09:19,922
Jenny that's not very sweet

214
00:09:19,922 --> 00:09:20,562
Oh

215
00:09:20,562 --> 00:09:23,302
Two wolves are battling inside of me.

216
00:09:24,242 --> 00:09:25,022
Jenny!

217
00:09:28,222 --> 00:09:30,602
Oh, that's kind of a sweet sound.

218
00:09:32,182 --> 00:09:33,322
Oh, no.

219
00:09:34,262 --> 00:09:34,842
Oh, no.

220
00:09:35,462 --> 00:09:36,762
Help me.

221
00:09:37,302 --> 00:09:38,722
Kill me.

222
00:09:42,682 --> 00:09:44,522
Here comes Major D.

223
00:09:45,142 --> 00:09:46,462
With our next chorus.

224
00:09:46,802 --> 00:09:47,962
Major D has our next chorus.

225
00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:49,242
Uh, buh, buh, buh.

226
00:09:49,242 --> 00:09:54,002
Yes, I'd love to learn about the cuisine of Cambodia.

227
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,722
No, Jenny, what is this doing to you?

228
00:09:59,522 --> 00:10:00,042
Jenny.

229
00:10:04,922 --> 00:10:09,782
You're not the sweet person that I matched with on sweet Bumble.

230
00:10:11,662 --> 00:10:14,802
Okay, how can I help you, Jenny?

231
00:10:14,802 --> 00:10:20,602
find my twin

232
00:10:20,602 --> 00:10:23,622
scene